You lib'ruls take a look at that Big Red Map!!!!

[Adenoid_Hynkel]

We conservatives first proved you lib'ruls wrong back in 2000, when we wanted to show you that "Bush won big," as the Newsmax ad featuring the Son of God, Michael Reagan, proclaimed. (The spot, soliciting a bumper sticker and subscription to the magazine, ran heavily on the then-new FOX News Channel in 2001)

The county-by-county map proves the mood of the country. Never mind the fact that Gore got more votes than Bush and that, if you take the disputed state of Florida out of the equation, that Gore was leading in the EV count as well. Why, just look at all that red, darn it! These colors don't lie!

We sure showed you again in 2004. The Republicans, this time proving that Bush's razor-thin win over John Kerry was a mandate, put out the same county-by-county map.

So it's no surprise that we're going to make you eat crow again in 2008. This time we'll prove that, despite a landslide for Barack Obama in the electoral college and a decisive margin in the popular vote over McCain, this country is still a center-right nation and its politics are inherently conservative. (And don't even bring up those Congressional numbers -- Ya'll know red when you see it and our map will set you straight)

You need look no further than site of Rush Limbaugh (who's always right) on Thursday, Novemeber 13. In a bit entitled (get ready for this!), "The Country is still Conservative," Rush posted the new Newsmax map.



I know you're looking at that and thinking, "Dick Cheney needs to hurry up and get out of Sarah Palin's House. That crimson means, "Case closed. Conservative landslide."

But it gets better.

Rush opines:

"You know, it's interesting, I saw today the final county map, red state, blue state map by county, and if you just landed here from Mars, and you looked at that map, you would swear the Republicans won this thing in a landslide, if you didn't know where the population centers are. I guarantee you by county and by square mileage, we skunked 'em!"

See, even an alien could understand it! (And not any of those border-crossing Obama-voting ones, neither. I'm talkin' E.T. here!)

Rush then wraps it up by reminding us the time-tested "Them-lib'ruls-think-they're better-than-you" truth with evidence like, "Liberals are the ones that organize in little communes and cliques and cities and so forth and only want to hang around with each other and themselves," and other red meat for us Dittoheads.

Next thing you know, lib'ruls will be holing themselves up in seclusion in their Florida compound, so afraid of the public that they'll have to send their maids out with a cigar box full of cash to collect their Oxycontin for them.

Being a sci-fi fan, I've decided to run with Rush's brilliant martians analogy.

Here's America as it would be seen at night from space by our friends from the red planet:



Can't put my finger on it as I take a look at where the country is actually populated, but something seems familiar about that picture.

My lib'rul co-worker tries to tell me that if aliens were actually advanced enough to come here, that would surely be smart enough to know that the barren desert of the West and cornfields of kansas aren't sentient and casting votes.

But you and I know that's crazy talk and the kind of stuff lib'ruls spout after they inhale a few too many fumes from those burning flags.

And I sure I hell don't know what this cartogram crap from electoral-vote.com he sent means.



This is a red, conservative country. End of story.

Now let's go buy some Toby Keith CDs.

[lady raven]

1. So the conservatives get more space. Big deal.

That's not quite fair. We need some breathing room too. (Thinking we should forcibly take some of their land. After all, Obama took all their guns, so they can't defend themselves!)

[musicblind]

2. Toby Keith endorsed Obama.

I know. I was shocked too.

[Adenoid_Hynkel]

3. Damn it! Who's next? William F. Buckley's kids?

What kind of a Rod Serling world is this coming to?!?

DAMN YOU ALL TO HELL!!!!

[stevedeshazer]

4. It's amazing that all the blue counties are places where people actually live.

A whole bunch of those red counties have way more jackrabbits and cattle than people.

[HopeFor2006]

7. Yeah, and if Mickey Mouse can vote

The jackrabbits and cattle should be able to vote too.
:rofl:

[CakeGrrl]

5. Well if soil could vote, he'd have an argument.

:rofl:

[Political Tiger]

6. Open cow fields vote Republican!

[Adenoid_Hynkel]

8. Here's a sneak peak at the site of the 2008 Palin/Jindal GOP convention

I call this one "Bush Country"

[RoyGBiv]

9. So ... They won where there are no people ...

Good luck with that strategy.

[MI4Obama]

10. When will they learn

landmass cannot vote. Fortunately for us (and the state of our nation) it will probably take a few more election cycles.

[No Elephants]

11. Land mass does not go to the polls, but the polls are not the ballgame. The ballgame is the

electoral college; and land mass does kind of vote there.

[Doremus]

12. I'd like hear see their reaction if somebody were to color in

OH, IN, FL and NC.

Apoplectic no doubt.