http://www.dailyiowan.com/media/paper599/news/2006/02/08/Opinions/Sex-Topic.Lacking.Substance-1603145.shtml?norewrite&sourcedomain=www.dailyiowan.com Sex topic lacking substance
The Iowa Legislature is not getting off to an auspicious start. Despite venting outrage over the fact the TouchPlay video-gambling machines, whose installation it authorized, are apparently being used for gambling, legislators have found the time to consider House File 2163. The bill, introduced on Jan. 30 by Rep. Dawn Pettengill, D-Mount Auburn, seeks to restrict "the exhibition or dissemination of certain sexual devices to minors." Yes, that's right. Our elected officials have been spending the week debating sex toys.
The bill, itself, borders on self-parody at times. It would not only criminalize the sale of a "sexual device" to a minor but also the possession of such an item in the presence of anyone under age 18. Bizarrely, the law excludes parents and guardians - but no other family members - from this regulation. (A "sexual device" is defined as "any three-dimensional item designed and marketed as useful primarily for the stimulation of human genital organs." How often do lawmakers have to come up with phrases like that?)
Yet, as humorous as the bill appears, its implications are not very funny. Anyone convicted under the law would be guilty of a serious misdemeanor, punishable by up to a year in prison and a $250-$1,500 fine. But the most worrisome aspect is that violators would be placed on the state's registry of sex offenders, which is certainly no laughing matter.
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How do they come up with this crap? I see Pettengill is from Mount Auburn. I do not know where Mount Auburn is for sure, but I am guessing the adult book store is quaking in its boots with such a watchdog of public (pubic?) morals in its midsts.
Wouldn't it be a better use of the legislature's time to figure out how to handle the medical care for an uninsured person who goes into orgasmic shock using such a device?
Will a coach now be able to allow a student to use a massager to work out a charlie-horse without threat of life in prison? How will vaseline be categorized? Oh so many technical questions on this one that it might take up the whole session.
Oh and let's cut taxes and close schools.