Why do people get so touchy when discussing religion?

[Philosoraptor]

Why can't we discuss religion, pro and con, without descending into insults and jabs?

[wug37]

1. Easy answer to that

Religion, like politics, is very personal. So when discussing religion at any more than a very high level, it becomes very personal and things are taken personally. Statements are taken as insults and jabs, and are therefore returned as such.

[LaurenG]

2. My take

It makes people fearful to have their beliefs taken apart and made possibly "wrong". If what you believe in your core is made to seem wrong it makes one defensive thus causing big giant FIGHTS.

[jus_the_facts]

3. becaues it's impossible...look at the middle east.....

....same as it ever was. :nopity:

[LynzM]

4. I think it's because for most people....

It's a defining part of who they are, and what they believe, and I think that many people don't like to be told that their beliefs are wrong, or consider things outside of what is comfortable for themselves as a worldview. That, and it can be awfully scary to start thinking about not believing something you've believed for your whole life, too.

[Warpy]

5. Probably because nothing in the world looks stupider

than somebody else's religion, although somebody else's marital fight is certainly a close second.

Religious beliefs are felt on a visceral level as such an integral part of who a person is that to attack the belief is to attack the person.

That's this atheist's take on it, anyway.

[JitterbugPerfume]

6. because

only I know gods will and you are unenlightened:sarcasm:

[Donald Ian Rankin]

7. Because there isn't a clear standard of what is and isn't offensive

And, people being what they are, and especially posters to internet forums being what they are, every sets the standard for what degree of criticism of their beliefs is innoffensive much lower than the standard for other people's beliefs.

That means that in most discussions you will have people on both sides who genuinely feel wronged and self-righteous, and have no qualms about "being as rude to the other person as they're being to them".

[no_hypocrisy]

8. A rabbi explained it this way to me, so here goes:

Try to equate religion, any religion, with having the ultimate answer to all problems. And being the ultimate answer, everything else is lesser, a mistake, and illegitimate. And further, when nonbelievers do not embrace your religion, you take it personally, you feel rebuffed, and it can go to the point where you feel like your religion is being delegitimized and attacked by the nonsupport.

So, the emotional distress by SOME religionists is rather personally psychological and sometimes the result of being manipulated to go along with the crowd (social psychology). This negative reaction can be conscious or unconscious, but as a nonbeliever, you still have to deal with it and logic is not one of the strongest tools in your box. And there's the rub as it's hard to reach a consensus when you lack the ability to agree.

[Lowell]

9. It is discouraging to discover

that someone you know and consider intelligent believes in fairy tales. I just avoid it at all costs unless asked directly. Then just answer truthfully and don't elaborate or get down in the mud with them.

[TallahasseeGrannie]

10. I think it is because the questions and statements

that usually are part of an argument, when it is about religion, become insulting.

Like calling belief "fairy tales" which says so much more about the person saying it than the believer. It says that the accuser is poorly mannered and has little tolerance, tact, or nuance. And when they innocently say "why what's wrong with fairy tales?" they are ingenuous because they know very well that fairy tales are for children. And to call an adult childlike is an insult.

And then on the other end we have the "whackjob atheist" jabs and the folks who simply cannot believe that anyone doesn't share their convictions and takes all sorts of rabbit tunnels to try and get to the place where atheists believe something..anything! Those folks need to turn the binoculars around the other direction and see the whole picture.

Tolerance is a skill. You have to learn it and you have to practice it.

[Finder]

11. If someone is not willing to have their beliefs questioned or discussed...

they should not be on a topic/discussion of theology.

[Jeroen]

15. Discussion of Theology isn’t only about questioning ones believes

[SPKrazy]

19. I Think That Sounds Absurd

a person may wish to discuss theology and religion without wanting to have their beliefs questioned

[SPKrazy]

18. Now If I Said That TG

I'd be roasted

I guess there are some times when one just sits back and watches rather than post what they think.

[NMMNG]

12. To many people,

their religion is part of what they are, a part of their identity. If someone criticizes their religion it is, in essence, like the person is criticizing them. To say, "your religion is stupid" is to say, "you are stupid/you're stupid for being (insert name of religion here)". It can be very hard (if not impossible) for people to look at their religion objectively, even if they can look at other religions that way.

[cosmik debris]

13. People believe for emotional reasons

So any discussion of religion is by its very nature emotional.

It is easy to accept that you are wrong about the dates of the Civil War, but it is not easy to accept that you are wrong about an emotion based belief. So people cling more tightly to their emotion based beliefs than their fact based beliefs.

You can tell a person that his facts are wrong and they will get over it. But if you tell a person his emotions are wrong you will have a fight on your hands.

[Jeroen]

14. Because it is like playing soccer without goals - but seriously: I agree

[SPKrazy]

20. Emotions Aren't Wrong

beliefs associated or based on emotions can often be wrong, but not emotions themselves

emotions just are, it's what we do with them that counts

[nemo137]

16. Because its intensely personal

I think Lydia Leftcoast uses the analogy about someone bad mouthing your significant other. It's something that's so firmly tied into people, so closely linked to their last inch, that you can't separate it from who they are.

[smirkymonkey]

17. People get touchy because they are insecure in their beliefs.

If they weren't, If they had true faith (meaning no doubts) they would dismiss all naysayers as misguided meddlers. The fact that people get so angry when their faith is challenged leads me to believe that they really don't have a very solid faith to begin with.

The truth sometimes gets to people, or at least the insinuation that one's truth is a bit of a lie.

[SPKrazy]

21. True Faith=No Doubts?

I have never thought that having faith meant never questioning, or thinking about your beliefs

I don't think it is always insecurity (it may be sometimes), I think that religion is very personal, and for many people a core of who they are, it's like questioning any other core belief a person has that is part of defining them, it is going to get a rise.

If someone questions someone's lack of belief on this forum, it usually gets a rise.

I someone came out and questioned people's core ideas it gets a response, religion is a particularly touchy one.

[smirkymonkey]

23. Not necessarily no doubts, but serious underlying doubt is what

I think is a the root of a lot of religious insecurity.

[Dorian Gray]

26. I want to agree...

I have faith, but I also constantly question my faith. That questioning makes my faith stronger, though there are days when it is shakier than others. It is natural to question.

[Lydia Leftcoast]

22. Actually, I was always taught (in two different denominations no less)

that doubt is natural and normal.

[smirkymonkey]

24. However, most of the people that get REALLY upset are usually

the people that are very externally religious - the ones who talk about it all the time and say "Jesus" this, and "Allah" that, etc..... I think the people who ARE threatened are usually the hypocrites, meaning that they don't necessarily have true faith, they just hide behind dogma, hate and rigidity and are secretly without the secure knowing (with maybe a few reasonable doubts) that the really faithful (usually the quiet ones) have.

[ulysses]

29. that seems a poor version of faith.

Practiced, I know, by legions of fundamentalists who are too immature to know how to approach doubt, but I very much doubt that that's the kind of faith that religious DUers practice.

In fact, the only time I see DUers of faith get angry isn't when their faith is challenged, but when the "challenge" is actually a personal insult in disguise. (The same goes in return, of course, for "whackjob atheist" comments...)

[Dorian Gray]

25. Too many people

identify their SELF with their religious beliefs. They belive that the foundations of their belief (or non-belief) is at the core of who they are as people. Whether raised in a belief system or converted to said belief system, that system is inextricably linked to who they are as people in a way that politics or other beliefs may not be.

Hence the touchy touchy.

[Dissenting_Prole]

27. Because death is inevitable.

Most religious schemes have a system that allows the believer to cheat death. And as you know, death is terrifying.

So, if I have a scheme that allows me avoid a state of non-existence, and your beliefs challenge that, I must do everything in my power to destroy your beliefs. Either I must convert you, or make sure that you are destroyed.

[Evoman]

28. I have to admit, I get touchy...I just hide it really well.

Like I said in another thread, when people tell me God loves me, but I have to accept Jesus or burn in a fiery hell for eternity, I get intellectually offended. The very idea is ridiculous, and I feel like kicking the person in the teeth for being so stupid. We all get offended once in awhile...its unavoidable...how you handle that offense, however, tells a lot about you. Most people who offend me would never know it...not only that, since I know they are not TRYING to offend me, I'm pretty quick in forgiving them the offense.

To be honest, though, I don't really get offended on the internet. For some reason, unless I'm looking someone in the face, its not that bad.