Heterosexuality Can Be Cured!

[hedgehog]

Leviticus International says that straights can be “born again” as gay with the help and love of Jesus Christ. Joseph “Bo” Kelly, of Las Vegas, NV, a former heterosexual, claims it worked for him. According to Kelly, his compulsive attraction to women led him to two suicide attempts. “Now that I’m gay, my life is divine, and I don’t mean in the biblical sense. My boyfriend and I share so much more than I ever did with any of my four ex wives. I thank God for taking that sinful disorder away from me.”

How did it work? “I got on my knees and asked Jesus Christ to release me from the spell cast by women.” It took weeks of prayer but it finally worked. Then I met Todd at church. One thing led to another and the next thing I knew, it was Super Bowl. We were so excited by the football game, let’s just say there was dancing in the end zone. And we moved out of the trailer park into a fabulous Italian palazzo with topiary and an herb garden. I can’t thank Rev. Karl enough. Prayer works.

http://queering-the-church.com/blog/?p=5965

[donco6]

1. Now THAT I have seen.

Can't tell you how many former heterosexuals I can personally attest to having been converted. Not necessarily by me . . . but . . . well, I have a few toasters to give away.

[tekisui]

2. Praise Jeebus!

:rofl:

[MikeE]

3. This is great!

I knew it! Although, I'm not sure if what cured him was the weeks of prayer or just getting on his knees in front of Jesus LOL O8)

[Crazy Dave]

4. I'd prefer bi

So I could have double the options :thumbsup:

[stray cat]

5. In that case the human population will cease to exist - so much for evolution and the species

but maybe people could force themselves to peform and unnatural repulsive act and pro-create with strangers or those they hire and not significant others

[The Doctor.]

9. LOVE your profile!

It says so much about you!

Let's review your contribution;

In that case the human population will cease to exist - so much for evolution and the species
Posted by stray cat


but maybe people could force themselves to peform and unnatural repulsive act and pro-create with strangers or those they hire and not significant others



Just to be clear; this is an 'inversion' commentary?

[madinmaryland]

6. Hmmm. Limbaugh has been married three times. Maybe he needs to be born

again as gay. Sorry to suggest that thought, to the GLBT members here.

I just bent my brain thinking about that.

[ZombieHorde]

7. Recommended. nt

[The Doctor.]

8. Thank JEEBUS!

Maybe I can start dating the sane members of the species now!

:evilgrin:

[Canuckistanian]

10. Well, good to know

I, too have a compulsive attraction to women. But I think I'll pass this time.

But I think there are others who may be more 'confused' than I am, however. Many people of the fundamentalist persuasion, or so I am told.

May they find peace at last.

[RetiredTrotskyite]

11. LOVE IT!

:rofl:

[qb]

12. Another happy convert here!

I say this in jest, of course. I was, sadly, in the closet.