'I am transgender, and I want my voice to be heard'

[icymist]

(CNN) -- Rebecca Avery always felt different, even as a child. It wasn't until the age of 13 that she would even hear the word that explained why she felt out of place -- she was transgender.

It would take another 14 years and a new job before she started her transition from male to female.

Avery, 30, works as a graphic designer in Waukegan, Illinois. And even though she has worked in the publishing and design field for 10 years, only the past four have been under her current name and identity.

Her transition has made finding work difficult. "For a while, I was trying to cut off all my past work from before my transition," Avery said. "Questions kept coming up, and there was just no escape from the past."

http://edition.cnn.com/2010/LIVING/04/14/transgender.irpt/

[readmoreoften]

1. I personally can't wait until my partner has a full beard and an "F" on his driver's license.

:sarcasm: But even with all the legal, family, and social problems it brings, he has never been happier since he started his transition. But he will probably be in a legal no-man's-land for the rest of his life.

[undergroundpanther]

2. my beard is looking

better than I thought it would,wish it would grow faster tho. The legal limbo thing bothers me too.
I am scared to change my name to what I really want it to be because I am disabled.If the system messes up and my checks come late I am screwn.

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5. Yeah, my honey's got 13 year old boy beard on a 30 year old FTM face.

He's so cute :)
Unfortunately, not passable yet. So we just look "gayer" as a couple and yet more looks of panic thrown our way than ever.

[undergroundpanther]

6. Yeah I know whatcha mean about looking"gayer"

We get the same horrified looks too.

[Divine Discontent]

7. as the verse goes "more power to ya"... so much so! I'm glad you have someone you love.

I wish I had the same. And they can look all they want, you are special and you are loved - how wonderful!

[gvstn]

3. Thanks to all posters to this thread.

As a gay man it has taken me till my (early!) 40's to truly appreciate the realities of transgender issues. I always was a bit put off my men who wanted to dress like women let alone those that wanted to change genders. I always put it in that category of they are just confused and can't admit they are gay. I was of course wrong and looking at things through my own prism and that of my generation.

I think the movie Transamerica was the first film that really gave me an appreciation of what it meant to be transgendered. I rented the film hoping Kevin Zegers would get naked but found Felicity Huffman as the character Bree so compelling. I hope this movie isn't an insult to transgendered people because it really did change my mind. For many years I just had an aversion to even drag queen type shows let alone guys that were compelled to make more permanent changes. Those feelings don't exist any more for me and I think it would be a great day when everyone feels the same. I don't understand exactly what about that movie enlightened me but it did.

I am so happy to see transgendered and loved ones of transgendered people being brave and standing up for themselves.

After hearing Rep. Steve King's comments about gays needing to hide their identities to remain employed; I can imagine how terrible transgendered people must feel.

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4. It's really scary. I think for FTMs it's a particularly weird journey.

The laws are written more towards MTFs. Legally, a "sex change" happens when after genital reassignment. With transmen, genital surgery is often expensive, unattractive, and not even desired by the person transitioning. But the state doesn't always consider top surgery or hormone treatment "enough". You've gotta have your bits tampered with.

The result of this is having an "F" on your license even if you don't pass for female--leading to uncomfortable alcohol purchases, nerve-wracking overseas travel, and letters from doctors kept in the wallet for routine traffic stops.