Changes AOL users can expect to see now that AOL has hired Mary Cheney

[kweerwolf]

1. That annoying "You've got mail!" will be replaced by a recording of Rosie O'Donnell saying, "You've got female!"

2. During lengthy downloads, AOL users can opt for listening to music by Melissa Ethridge and the Indigo Girls.

3. Profile photos will be rejected unless the subject is wearing a flannel shirt or softball uniform.

4. Really butch lesbians will monitor and mediate all chatroom disputes.

5. At least two lesbians will be assigned to every gay male chatroom and will be instructing to begin discussing the finer points of girl-on-girl sex if the guys get too raunchy.

6. The "News of the Day" feature will be replaced by sports news featuring Women's Pro Golf standings and frequent updates on the AOL women's softball team's results.

7. AOL online polls will feature probing questions such as "Who's hotter? Melissa Ethridge or k.d. lang?" and "Which describes your feelings about Anne Heche? 1. Hate her 2. Really hate her 3. Really, REALLY hate her 4. I speed up to run over Anne Heche?"

8. While keeping the same acronym, AOL which switch from "America On Line" to "Almost Only Lesbians."

[davidinalameda]

1. oh my

:rofl:

[kweerwolf]

2. dang! Where the emoticon for "tongue-in-cheek" when you need it ...

... just in case anyone takes it too seriously. :P

[NMMNG]

3. Oy vey

:rofl: