What is your age and at what age did you come out?

[dsc]

I am curious as to the extent to which younger people are really coming out younger. I apologize to those between 25 and 30 but I couldn't fit you in this poll.

[xchrom]

1. i voted, that's all i'm going to say.

[HarukaTheTrophyWife]

2. Coming out...

I came out as bisexual when I was 15 with my friends at school. By the time I was 16, I came out as a lesbian (no issues coming out as bi). Shortly afterwards, my mother searched my room and yanked me out of the closet. The fucked up story is in his DU Blog.

I went to the senior prom with an FTM and we wore matching tuxes. No one hassled us at all. We only got positive comments.

[dsc]

3. You don't realize how amazing that sounds to someone from

my era. Great for you. Glad it went well.

[HarukaTheTrophyWife]

6. I had a lot of friends.

I was well-entrenched in the arty/theatre clique but I also hung out with some of the cheerleaders. The cooler guys in the school enjoyed having a girl around that could check out girls. My teachers were awesome. The only offensive homophobe I had to deal with was the principal when it came to starting the Gay-Straight Alliance. We did get an awesome picture of him at the prom. Him standing between my date & I. He got beet red and started sweating, then stuttered "Uhh...uhh...I...I...want an 8x10 glossy of this."

So that's what we did. Monday morning, I left it in his office, framed with a note that said,

"Dear Barry,

This is my graduation gift to you.

Love,
Jackie"

One of my teachers told me that he did hang it up in his office after I graduated. She said he probably did it so people would stop calling him a homophobe.

[dsc]

10. sounds amazing

Great job. Fortunately educators are getting better about homophobia.

[HarukaTheTrophyWife]

7. Oops...posted twice.

[JustFiveMoreMinutes]

4. THIRTY???????????????

I know being over 40 in the gay community is likened to being invisible... but do you HAVE to put it into words?

Sorry, gotta run, the dot in my hand has been glowing red for years and they've finally found me.

[BR_Parkway]

25. Maybe we should start a Bifocaled Queers group. Over 40, came

out when I was 32. For those of you waiting, it's not as bad as you think it'll be. My parents, ex-wife, kids and grandkid are all fine with it.

[W_HAMILTON]

5. I was about to say...

I don't exist in this poll :p

I just turned 26, and still am not out yet. It's not such a big deal to me, but I figure I would wait till I found someone to be with before I came out. Unfortunately, I'm not the party/club type, and I can't really just fall in love with someone through those online dating services. I'm basically left waiting to meet someone in an everyday situation, and of course, I'm not sure I've even met another "out" gay person, sooooo yeah. Up until now it's basically been me falling for straight guys, since that's really the only type of guys I've ever been around. It stinks!

So 26 and not out yet, even though I'm pretty sure that people are coming out younger and younger all the time now. I read an article about how people used to not come out until their 20's, but now kids are frequently coming out between 14-18.

[HarukaTheTrophyWife]

8. Come out.

You'll probably meet people easier that way. I was out in HS and I dated quite a few girls (who weren't necessarily out). Who knows there might be some cute closeted guy out there with a crush on you that thinks you're straight.

[dsc]

9. We must have read similar articles

and I was testing the theory. The article I read was dated in 2000 so I added the 6 years to the 18 year old an adult would be and rounded up to 25.

[ncrainbowgrrl]

11. 26 now

Came out as a lesbian at 18/19
Came out as bisexual at 19, and still continue to come out!

[donco6]

12. None of the above.

Older than 45 and came out at 31.

[dsc]

13. wouldn't that be covered

by my second choice?

[donco6]

14. Oops, misread it.

Hey, I'm old. Give me a break. :)

[TechBear_Seattle]

15. I'm 38; came out at 15

I admitted to myself that I was gay on March 26, 1983 at 3:56 p.m. (I was a neurotic journalkeeper in my teens.) I was so surprised that I was still alive when March 26, 1984 came around that I treated my self out to lunch, and have kept March 26 ever since as a day of celebration.

I came out to my mom and step-dad on May 19, 1983, at 8:24 p.m. About 10 minutes latter, I realized that I would keep May 19 as a day of fasting and repentance for the rest of my life.

My mom couldn't decide if I was claiming to be gay because I had been molested, or if I was claiming to be gay as some sort of cruel joke to get attention. At a loss over whether I needed to be protected or punished, she hit on the perfect compromise....

I was grounded.

I had to take the bus to and from school (I preferred to walk), could not stay after school (I was in the chess club), could not receive or make phone calls, could not have friends over, could not leave our property without having at least one other family member with me at all times. That lasted almost three weeks before I was freed on probation. That lasted until late September, when my nosy mom found some books I had checked out of the library on the history of the gay pride movement.

Did I mention that I was so surprised to still be alive a year after coming out that I kept the date as a day of celebration?

[Rowdyboy]

16. Came out to myself as 100% gay at 25 (1979), and my family in my 30's....

Life is very different than it was in the 1960's. DU's young gay members are luckier than they know.

[Maven]

17. 24 now, came out at 19.

Wee!

[zcflint09]

18. well

came out at 16, realized that i was gay probably by the time i was 11. right now i'm 18. i was actually outed, didn't really come out myself. aunt and uncle, who i was living with at the time, read a livejournal entry that i accidentally left up on our computer. bad mistake, but in all actuality, it went without a hitch. apparently they'd all pretty much knew, and everything turned out for the best.

[dsc]

19. I am glad it went well for you

it is so hard to keep up a double life.

[TechBear_Seattle]

21. "Apparently they'd all pretty much knew"

That was kind of my experience. When I started coming out to my brothers and sisters in my mid 20s, the general reaction was, "Duh!" :eyes:

[tjwmason]

32. Welcome to D.U. - and glad it went so well.

:hi:

I also ended up coming out because of the discovery of something left in the wrong place :eyes:

[newyawker99]

38. Hi zcflint09!!

Welcome to DU!! :toast:

[terrya]

20. I'm 50 and I came out when I was 22.

[progmom]

22. I'm 34. I came out when I was 34.

:hi:

[TechBear_Seattle]

23. An early happy first anniversary to you! n/t

[transeo]

24. 29 now, out at 17

I was actually extracted from the closet by my snooping mother. It took me some time to forgive her, but now I am so very happy she did it.

[GymGeekAus]

26. I'm not old! I'm prime-aged beef!

Well, not as much as I should be. I keep skipping my civic responsibility to hit the gym.

I have a great story from several years ago, back when I was 27. I was at a bar here in Austin, chatting with a couple of younger guys. One was 21, the other 22. The conversation went something like this.

21: Why do all these old guys come to the bar anyway? It's just sad.
22: I know. You'd think they'd have something better to do.
Me: I dunno, the same argument could be made about us. Why aren't we out doing something better?
21: Hey, we're young. We're supposed to waste our time.
22: Yeah, we don't have anything else to do anyway. But look at that guy over there, he must be at least 25.
21: Yeah, by that time I better be settled down. I don't wanna be old and single.
Me: Young and single has been an awful lot of fun, though. And that guy looks happy.
21: Well, people just shouldn't go out to bars after they turn 24.
22: Yeah. 24 or 25. I don't want to be surrounded by old guys.
Me: Well, they probably have jobs, they're probably out of school by now. At least they can afford their own alcohol.
21: I can afford my own alcohol.
22: No you don't, your parents pay for it.
Me: Do they know that?
21: Nah.
22: Anyway, they should go find their own bar.
Me: I think this was their bar before it was our bar.
21: Well they should go find a different bar.
22: I can't even imagine sleeping with a guy over 25.
Me: I wouldn't knock it until you tried it. Experience is a great teacher.
21: Whatever.

The 22-year old eventually took me back to his place. And there I shared my age with him. He conveniently had forgotten this conversation. He was an awful lay, too.

[pro_blue_guy]

27. I am currently 21 and came out when I was 20

[NoQuarter]

28. 47 now,

21 then.

[Ediacara]

29. 28 now, out at 19

Since you won't let me vote :-)

[FuzzyDicePHL]

30. 40 now, out at 16

Out to myself @ 16, out to my parents @ 17. Like for many parents, it was not a surprise to them.

[tjwmason]

31. What I noticed

was that about 5 guys from my year at school came out during the first year of university. Only one had come-out at school. I'm mid 20s, so this is fairly recent.

It was a definite change for me (didn't realise myself at this point) to go from a school (even worse an all boys school) where 'gay' was the insult of choice (though the guy who did come-out didn't get any flack at all about it) to university where it was widespread open and considered totally normal.

[triakis36]

33. 26 out at 25

Out to my parents at 23. uh..ya I was sorta out again in again for a while. First time out at 21, and finally out for good at 25. Thank goodness, 'cause I certainly feel much better for it. :D

[UncleSepp]

34. 34, came out twice - at 16 or so, and at 33

It was kinda complicated. At 16 I was openly bisexual. I still am, although I have only had one encounter with a woman since high school. I have been taken for a butch lesbian for a very long time, even while I was married.

My second coming out was by accident, and very funny. I was meeting with my boss before leaving for vacation, and we were discussing my review. He was telling me something about a Xiotech storage utility, and something about what I was learning, and becoming the "storage queen" or something along those lines. I started giggling, he started talking about women in the workplace and all this. I could not stop laughing, so I changed the subject. He asked what I was doing over the vacation, and I started laughing again. I was going to an FtM conference. I had to tell him, and he said "Ohhh! That explains it! When you started here, we all just thought you were gay, and then you started talking about your husband..."

I said, "You were right, but just not in the way you thought."

[triakis36]

35. Hehe, good story...

:headbang:

[Taxloss]

36. I'm 28, and I came out age 28. There's no option for me! n/t

[GodlessBiker]

37. Yeah. People 25-30 are completely ignored.

[dickthegrouch]

39. 50 Now, came out at 16

Mom was apoplectic, Dad was real cool. Two years later they had switched positions, Dad was worried and mom was on my side.

Now that they (know they) have two gay sons they are really cool with it.

I live a long way from home and my brother lives a lot closer, so he spends more time there. He was always put in a different room from his boyfriend. When I went visiting, my boyfriend and I were put in the same room - major jealousy!

Some people find such "trivial" things to worry about.

[Glorfindel]

40. Older than dirt, came out at about age 22, family already knew...

basically said, "so what?" and started hunting boyfriends for me. Even my older brother, the super-straight jock. I wondered then why I had spent all those years being scared of being exposed. Please, closeted guys and girls, come on out...it's not as bad as you fear it will be. Those who love you will love you still (or even more) and those who don't, don't matter anyway.