How many of you are involved in a marriage equivalent relationship but can't get married.

[dsc]

I am curious as to how many of us would actually be helped by same sex marriage equity.

[FARAFIELD]

1. IM Catholic and my wife is Methodist

does that count?

[dsc]

2. not unless you have been banned from getting married

[littlebit]

3. Been with the same woman

for almost nine years. According to the state I live in we are just roommates.

[NMMNG]

4. I'm engaged right now.

We're waiting for the SCOTUS of our state to decide whether we can get a real Marriage or just a Domestic Partnership. The decision is expected to be handed down within about 75 days now.

[dsc]

5. hope for the best

At least you have a plan b. I know it wouldn't be as good but the dp could be helpful for some things.

[NMMNG]

6. Yes

The "Colored Only" drinking fountain is better than going thirsty. It's still not equality, though, so we'll keep fighting.

Thanks and best wishes to you and everyone else. :hi:

[dsc]

7. I need to find the man first, then hell has to freeze over

since I live in NC. But good luck on yours and congrats on your relationship either way.

[NorthCarolina]

13. Been together for 7 years

but like you we also live in NC so we're not holding our breath for any great transformations.

[littlebit]

15. Same here

we know how you feel.:hi:

[NorthCarolina]

16. Welcome to the club

.... it's not like any of us have much choice in the matter I suppose, at least until we can diminish the power the "haters" have over our government.

[moose65]

25. Another NC boy, here!

My partner and I have been together for over 4 years now, but there's nothing "legal" about it. In the eyes of the law, he's my roommate, which sounds silly when you're talking about a 42 year-old and a 36 year-old.

[Not Me]

8. I live in FL...

Own a home here and a condo in Toronto. Our intent is to snowbird up in Ontario during the summers after retirement.
We may reconsider the whole arrangement if FL passes the anti-marriage amendment this coming fall...living all or most of the time up north. The weather would kill me, but FL is pissing me off more and more.

[dsc]

9. global warming baby global warming

[mitchtv]

10. After 31 years

they can say anything they want , we are married but illegally so

[Rowdyboy]

11. 19 wonderful years sleeping with my best friend but the state of Mississippi....

has no synpathy for such. I think we probably would marry if it was legal here

[Lyric]

12. We've been together for nine years.

We have an 8 year old little boy, a Golden Retriever, and a handful of cats.

But according to my state and the federal government, she's nothing more than a longtime roommate.

[TankLV]

18. We have TWO goldens (lost are "surgar" Cookie girl last week to cancer) and a cat...

same thing about how our relationship is "considered"...

[Bluenorthwest]

14. 16 years

Our state just opened up Civil Unions, but we have not done so as yet. We have not lived here long, may move this year, and the 'rights' are limited and not transferable.
If we could file jointly on Fed Taxes, we would have zero debt, and zero needs unmet. That is what matters to us. Half baked crap is half baked crap. This state and many others also allow for example Medical Marijuana, but the Feds arrest and prosecute if they want. State protection is in some ways partial protection and in some ways none at all. Equity is the word I like.

[TankLV]

17. No room for "other"?

I'm in an eight year monogomous and exclusive loving relationship, but CAN'T get married even if I wanted to, because it's NOT an "option".

You left out THAT important overwhelming common "choice"...

[dsc]

23. My state refuses to recognize my same gender relationship at all

would encompass that.

[Ms. Toad]

19. Ouch! You left me out

I am legally married to my same gender partner, but have no federal or state rights.

A marriage is essentially a three party contract between the couple and the state (and by extension the encompassing federal government).

Normally, when a US couple marries in British Columbia, Canada the state in which they live steps in and fills the role of British Columbia (and Canada). The same thing happens on a smaller scale when a couple marries in one state, then moves to another state.

I was married in Victoria, British Columbia, Canada. Because of the federal marriage discrimination statute, and Ohio's marriage discrimination amendment, Ohio and the United States have asserted they are not legally obligated to stand in for British Columbia and Canada. I happen to believe this violates the Federal constitution - but until a case works its way through court, I am legally married with no accompanying rights except when I travel to Canada (or other countries that recognize same gender marriages) or Massachusetts.

Folks who married in Massachusetts but moved/lived elsewhere are in a similar boat.

Our marriage - 26+ years. Recognized by our faith community for 13 years. Legally married - 3 years this spring. Recognized by my state/US - still waiting (very impatiently!)

[Rhythm]

20. 9 years... and counting.

I see she already posted above, too...

:hug: to my dearly-beloved Oktoberain!

[SacredCow]

21. I don't know how to vote....

I'm in a relationship, but it's nothing like being married (and I know this with all certainty, since I was married to an opposite sex partner for 10 years). I live in his house and pay him "rent" to cover utilities and other things... I keep my own finances, and he keeps his... Overall, there's a pretty clear distinction of "mine," "yours," and "ours" (and there really isn't much in the "ours" category)... He has his health insurance from his retirement package, and I have mine through my employer...

I'm obviously all for something to allow same-sex partners equal legal privileges (whether it's called marriage or not seems irrelevant to me), but I won't be making use of any such right. Personally, I find the whole concept of marriage devoid of anything that is truly meaningful to me anymore.

So, it really wouldn't help me personally. But obviously, I'm in the minority here- and that's OK. My life's experiences led me to this place...

:hi:

[mondo joe]

22. 18 years, 2 kids. We took steps to form as equivalent a situation as we could - merged finances,

durable power of attorney, wills, etc. Then WA state came through with a Domestic Partner registry which was helpful.

[galledgoblin]

24. WRITE A WILL

I can't stress that enough! if you are in a relationship, particuarly a same sex or complex one (3 or more people), write your will and keep it updated! it's grim, and much less fun than signing a marriage certificate, but it will give you some legal ground to stand on if something happens.

[IndianaGreen]

26. I am happily single

Enough drama in my already!