How did you deal with coming out?

[ccharles000]

How did you deal with coming out? I at first admit that I was thinking of going in to the ex-gay world but decided against when the preachers wife told my mom I needed an exorcism (thank god my mom is not that Conservative). My cousin Dana who is a lesbian overdosed on her moms pain killers(she is ok). My best friend cut himself because he is transgendered. How did you feel win you came out.

[terrya]

1. I thought my parents would handle it very well.

My parents were both very open minded when it came to race...I thought they would be the same with me telling them I was a homosexual. Wrong. My mom cried...a lot. She asked me at one point if I was attracted to boys...she also said that I would be susceptable to blackmail...don't laugh, but that was what she told me. Of course, she and my dad were born in the late 20's and early 30's...my dad was born in 1927, my mom in 1931. So, that was the knowledge they had about homosexuality.

Following that completely unexpected reaction, I was never more stressed and defensive in my life. Eventually, we went to family counselling...to "straighten out" my problems, I guess. Of course, the counselling was a big waste of time. Because, well...you really can't "solve" that "problem", can you?

My coming out was not pleasant. All is well today, though.

[Zuiderelle]

2. When I came out, I didn't really care what anyone thought.

I just came out. That was nearly three decades ago. I was so used to being different that it was almost a relief to be different for a reason.

[qb]

3. I just called my friends & family & told them. They were cool about it.

My ex-wife told everyone else we knew (with my permission). Everyone was either supportive or neutral. I waited a couple of months until school let out before I told my kids (7 & 10). They were ok with it too.

[dsc]

4. I drank, alot

and don't recommend that method. It has taken quite some time but I am happy, sort of healthy (I could lose a few dozen pounds), and respected at my school. In short, even here in NC, you can have if not it all, at least alot. If you go to Pride in Sept or the movie festival in Aug, both in Durham, let me know.

[Q3JR4]

5. I came out to my mother

on, appropriately enough, Mother's Day. She flat out told me "why do you think you're gay?" and "I know you're not, you've never been that way." I cried, she cried, we both cried, there were lots of tears. At first she wanted me to "prove" that I wasn't the way she expected and wanted a reason for why I thought the way I did. Shortly after I started dating someone near my parents and she got used to the idea when she saw how happy I was.

Over the next couple of months she slowly outed me to the rest of the family (with my permission), and now we all have a great relationship.

Q3JR4.