Please dear C & B friends --Can one of you help me?

[The empressof all]

As I've mentioned, I have radically changed the way I eat over the past year and a half. I'm down about 68 pounds now....but I have pretty much had to sacrifice my cooking activities. If I spend too much time in the kitchen I veer down that slippery slope and all kinds of nasty things start to happen. Of course I am and probably will remain food obsessed and I have been thinking pretty much non stop about this.



It's a Tamale tart with a garlic custard and a crab meat topping.

http://www.saveur.com/article/Food/Tamale-Tart

Could one of you kind souls make this for me and tell me in graphic detail how perfectly Awful it is.

[Tangerine LaBamba]

1. I don't even have to make it,

believe me. I can tell from the photograph and the recipe how absolutely lousy it is.

The tart shell, probably because it contains both masa harina and cornmeal, has the mouth feel of the worst of Taco Bell. Plus, there's way too much cumin in it, so that taste is overwhelming and not in that fun Cinco de Mayo way, It's also soggy right under that filling, which is the next big mistake in this recipe.

Custard. Garlic custard. What lamebrain WASP came up with THIS idea? I suppose someone somewhere ran out of Jello and decided to go all avant-garde, or something. Not to be vulgar about it, but this custard, with all the oil and egg yolks and cream, has the feel of Gatorade on the tongue, and my son once said that Gatorade "tastes like spit." I wouldn't be that indelicate, but it does bring to mind certain nasal functions. There's not nearly enough garlic in this ::: cough, cough:::: custard to render it meaningful, and the wetness it leaves on the execrable crust is not pleasant.

You do need to have Kleenex handy if you're going to try to eat this concoction.

However, the topping is perfect, and with the addition of a bit of garlic along with the onions, I'd say this would make a very nice dish, all by itself. Perhaps tossed with some significant and precious greens.

The tart and the custard belong in Alice In Wonderland Tea Party Hell, where, I'm sure, the Mad Hatter will pronounce them quite tasty.

It's a good thing you didn't fix it ...................

[bicentennial_baby]

2. LOL

:rofl: Can always count on you...you've got a talent. :D

[Arkansas Granny]

3. Oh, you're good. I thought it looked pretty tasty until you "deconstructed" it.

I don't think that I could bring myself to put it in my mouth after that review.

[The empressof all]

6. You are the Best---T La B

I wouldn't have made it with that crust myself. I was thinking of a lovely flaky leaf lard crust. I thought the custard was intriguing though I was thinking of adding some onion flavor to it. The topping does look divine. But I can eat that on my food plan. I'm gonna check the prices on the crab when I go shopping tomorrow. If I don't need to mortgage the "farm" I'll be making the topping for dinner Thursday but I'll add more chili flavor and maybe some celery.

[Tesha]

4. Congrats on your achievement!

You rock!:headbang:

Honestly, you've got me beat by 28 pounds... but I'm working on it. One thing I've learned is, and I'll bet you already learned these things...

don't cut out everything wonderful
make a small one and when it's gone, it's gone
take the recipe and tweak it until it's good for you.

TLB is right, the filling just sounds heavy, the crust sounds heavy too.. but the crab topping over lettuce would be wonderful!

FOR THE CRAB TOPPING:
2 tbsp. olive oil
finely chopped
1⁄2 small yellow onion
1⁄4 red bell pepper
1⁄4 yellow bell pepper
1⁄4 poblano chile
10 oz. fresh lump crabmeat, picked and cleaned
2 tsp. fresh lime juice
2 tbsp. chopped cilantro

Next time I find a deal on crab I'm making this!

[The empressof all]

7. I know...We can eat the crab!

I'm making it for Thursday and serving it in lettuce leaves. I rarely go out to eat anymore so an occasional splurge on the Crab is within reason. And since the SO won't eat it I'm making it just for me and the kid. I won't need to get as much! I'll probably just get two Dungeness Crabs and Pick them myself. Then I can make some Crab and Cauliflower "bisque".

I've really been getting into the Cauliflower puree as a substitute for cream in soups. I stick an onion, celery, cauliflower and a bit of garlic in the pressure cooker with broth then cook till soft. Using the immersion blender I puree it and use it as a base for all kinds of lovely "creamy" soups. Full of fiber, low calorie and very filling!

[Tesha]

9. good tricks!

onion, celery, and garlic would be perfect to add - I'm going to remember that.


I've learned to absolutely love cauliflower, I steam it in the microwave then mash it - there's a creaminess that satisfies beautifully in a low-fat diet.

[Warpy]

5. I'm going along with the consensus on this one

because the crust sounds horrible and the custard absolutely vile, glue on floor sweepings.

However, that crabmeat topping is intriguing. I might have to make that one of these days and do either lettuce wraps or quesadillas with it.

However, that 1/4 poblano is miserly. I'll probably use the whole thing and substitute fake crab, as well.

[wakemeupwhenitsover]

8. I've got all the Saveur cookbooks & I used to

get the magazine & I have to say that I've never had a bad recipe from them. They've all been great & most get rave reviews, but this one does look a bit odd.