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hangemhigh Donating Member (587 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Feb-10-05 08:05 PM
Original message
Preparing for the imminent death of a dear canine friend-
A very close friend called a few minutes ago-their 15 year old Kirstie's little body has begun to shut down. She is in the advanced stages of diabetes and won't make it much longer. They are in tears and hysterical-not because she is suffering, she's calm and sleeping most of the time, but they are hysterical at the thought of losing her. I have my own thoughts-it's her time, she did for them what she was here to do for them (love, honor and protect them) and that although heartbreaking, it is her time-I feel that it's time to hold her close, love her and let her go peacefully and with dignity. It's probably not necessary at this time to have her put down. I would really appreciate everyone's insight-Not on whether my thoughts are right or wrong, but on how to help my dear friends face up to it- Peace.
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mopinko Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Feb-10-05 09:53 PM
Response to Original message
1. there is a buddhist saying
all beginnings are happy, and all endings are sad.
not that much else you can say. if she hadn't made them so happy, they wouldn't be sad now. it is the price we pay.
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hangemhigh Donating Member (587 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Feb-10-05 10:23 PM
Response to Reply #1
2. Thank you so much-
I am going to share this with them-Peace to you and yours and thank you for helping me to help the people I love.

Kitti
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Lorien Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Feb-10-05 11:13 PM
Response to Reply #2
3. When I lost my beloved Peewee, a friend wrote and said
"grief is the purest expression of having loved and loved well." it helped somehow.

No, unless the dog is obviously in pain, I would let nature take it's course. Having to put down an animal is sometimes the kindest thing we can do, but it is a horrible decision to make.
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hangemhigh Donating Member (587 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Feb-10-05 11:48 PM
Response to Reply #3
4. Thank you, Lorien-
Again you share your gift of doing the right things for our critters. (I have always used the term "critters" it's all in love) If this hasn't already been covered in this forum, we could all have a great discussion about what our animals are here to teach us. Peace and love- I am holding my own critters and their funky habits especially close to me tonight-
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livetohike Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-11-05 04:31 PM
Response to Original message
5. Share this with your friends when it is time
Edited on Fri Feb-11-05 04:33 PM by livetohike
The dreaming mind recalls past impressions.
It sees again what has been seen; it hears
Again what has been heard, enjoys again
What has been enjoyed in many places.
Seen and unseen, heard and unheard, enjoyed
And unenjoyed, the real and the unreal,
The mind sees all; the mind sees all.

-Prashna Upanishad

They will always have Kirstie in their hearts and in their dreams.
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Digit Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-11-05 08:25 PM
Response to Original message
6. It is neve an easy thing to lose best friend.
I feel their anquish.
Their beloved pet will always know they loved them.
I wish their pet an easy passing, and hope they can focus on the good times they had.
Losing a pet you love, and is your best friend is difficult.
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mermaid Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Feb-12-05 12:55 AM
Response to Original message
7. Share These With Your Friends....
I hope they help to comfort your friends in their time of grieving. It's hard to say goodbye to our furry friends...I know I will be a basket case when mine go, but these may help just a bit...


Rites of Passage - story by Robin Downing, D.V.M.

Some of the most poignant moments I spend as a veterinarian are those spent with my clients assisting the transition of my animal patients from this world to the next. When living becomes a burden, whether from pain or loss of normal functions, I can help a family by ensuring that their beloved pet has an easy passing. Making this final decision is painful, and I have often felt powerless to comfort the grieving owners.

That was before I met Shane.
I had been called to examine a ten-year-old blue heeler named Belker who had developed a serious health problem. The dog's owners; Ron, his wife, Lisa, and their little boy, Shane, were all very attached to Belker and they were hoping for a miracle. I examined Belker and found he was dying of cancer. I told the family there were no miracles left for Belker, and offered to perform the euthanasia procedure for the old dog in their home. As we made arrangements, Ron and Lisa told me they thought it would be good for the four-year-old Shane to observe the procedure. They felt Shane could learn something from the experience. The next day, I felt the familiar catch in my throat as Belker's family surrounded him. Shane seemed so calm petting the old dog for the last time, that I wondered if he understood what was going on.

Within a few minutes, Belker slipped peacefully away. The little boy seemed to accept Belker's transition without any difficulty or confusion. We sat together for a while after Belker's death, wondering aloud about the sad fact that animal lives are shorter than human lives. Shane, who had been listening quietly, piped up, "I know why."Startled, we all turned to him. What came out of his mouth next stunned me - I'd never heard a more comforting explanation.

He said, "Everybody is born so that they can learn how to live a good life - like loving everybody and being nice, right?" The four-year-old continued, "Well, animals already know how to do that, so they don't have to stay as long."


The Story of Rainbow Bridge - Anonymous

Just this side of Heaven is a place called Rainbow Bridge. When an animal dies that has been especially close to someone here, that pet goes to Rainbow Bridge. There are meadows and hills for all of our special friends so they can run and play together. There is plenty of food, water and sunshine and our friends are warm and comfortable.
All the animals who had been ill and old are restored to health and vigor: those who were hurt or maimed are made whole and strong again, just as we remember them in our dreams of days and times gone by. The animals are happy and content, except for one small thing: they each miss someone very special, someone who was left behind.
They all run and play together, but the day comes when one suddenly stops and looks into the distance. His bright eyes are intent: his eager body begins to quiver. Suddenly, he breaks from the group, flying over the green grass, faster and faster. You have been spotted, and when you and your special friend finally meet, you cling together in joyous reunion, never to be parted again. The happy kisses rain upon your face; your hands again caress the beloved head, and you look once more into those trusting eyes, so long gone from your life, but never absent from your heart. Then you cross the Rainbow Bridge together...










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SiouxJ Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Feb-12-05 11:17 AM
Response to Reply #7
8. Oh man, thanks for making me cry this morning
I knew better than to click on this thread, having lost my companion of 18 years about a year and a half ago. But it was worth it. That line from the four year old is brilliant!
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mermaid Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Feb-12-05 12:48 PM
Response to Reply #8
10. Thanks
I'll be telling that story at church tomorrow.

We are having a blessing of the animals service tomorrow, and I am one of three in the congregation who will be sharing things like that with the congregation.

Of course, we are a Unitarian Universalist church.

Those stories always make me cry, and damned if I know how I'll get thru tomorrow without crying. But, at the same time...the tears are for a different reason.

At any rate, I loved Belker's Story...and, of course, Rainbow's Bridge.

I'll also be sharing "A Dog's Prayer" by Beth Norman Harris.
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Mandate My Ass Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Feb-15-05 11:13 AM
Response to Reply #7
21. From the mouths of babes, eh.
I lost my 15 1/2 yr old last month. It's never easy.

Peace to those who are facing such heartache.
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ernstbass Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Feb-12-05 12:27 PM
Response to Original message
9. It is so sad to lose a pet
but part of the commitment we make to them is to end their suffering when it is time. I'm sorry anyone has to go through this and our beloved pets wouldn't want us to grieve but to celebrate the joy of their memories.
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EFerrari Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-13-05 12:07 AM
Response to Original message
11. I've never posted here before, hi there
My dog had a stroke this morning. She's a yeller lab, and about 13 years old. She has no visible damage but she's been really quiet all day. We've just been watching her and trying to keep her warm and hydrated,comfortable. Not liking this.
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Minimus Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-13-05 11:15 AM
Response to Reply #11
12. I hope everything turns out okay. I had my 13 yo Sonic
put down 12/1/04 and I am still greiving. He was so sick and I know it was the best for him, just so hard on me.

Keep us posted on her prognosis.
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EFerrari Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-13-05 03:09 PM
Response to Reply #12
13. Thanks, Minimus. She's still quiet today.
Buddy isn't eating (which makes sense to me) but she's drinking water and able to go out to be curbed. She doesn't seem to be in any pain but seems a little confused and a little weak.

I used to do cat rescue, so have a lot of experience with ailing critters. Buddy seems to need heat and reassurance more than anything. She's always been such a patient girl, she's handling this much better than we are.

You'd think this would be easier after surviving two teenagers :) Let's see how we do.
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WhoDoYouTrust Donating Member (476 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-13-05 03:48 PM
Response to Original message
14. O.K., I'm crying.
We lost our "big dog", Casper on Wednesday. He had lost his dignity, so we thought it was the best for him. It definitely wasn't for us. We miss him so much. He was a 14 year old dalmation. Out "little dog", Lucy is still looking for him. It breaks my heart. She had harrassed him every day since we got her 5 years ago. With a heavy heart I had to respond to this thread.

He is gone, but never will be forgotten.

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EFerrari Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-13-05 05:24 PM
Response to Reply #14
15. Join you, a little later
My hubby is disabled (personality disorder) so it's been me and the cats watching over Buddy.

I went right into some kind of shock watching Buddy have her stroke. Not out of it yet although crying my eyes out might be an indicator.

What are you doing for Lucy? I bet she is looking for him. Have you thought of putting things that smell like Casper by her sleeping place?

My girl seems a little better today, but the day she goes, all bets are off. I went through a period of being really phobic, nearly housebound and I adopted Buddy for the express purpose of getting over that.

She was perfect. Went from a scrappy, nippy, yipping pup to the most patient being I've ever met. I got a permit and she went all over with me, on buses, to work, everywhere. I used to have trouble sleeping while I lived in Berkeley and so I'd put this really ugly looking steel collar on Buddy and walk any time of the night I wanted to, she looked so fierce. (I had to steer her away from people, because they were in extreme danger of being licked, which would have blown our cover. lol)

She used to sleep under my desk when I went back to teaching. She could be in a roomful of toddlers at a bare 8 months and be so gentle that she never knocked over a single one.

Once, my little niece felt afraid of Buddy. So, I taught her how to manage Buddy -- the verbal commands and the handle signals. And so this little tiny girl set out to get Buddy to sit and to "down" and to stay. And Buddy played along. Ella isn't afraid of big dogs anymore. :)

They're furry angels.
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WhoDoYouTrust Donating Member (476 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-13-05 06:03 PM
Response to Reply #15
16. oh, dear
I didn't read all the posts before I posted. I am feeling for you. At times I wished that Casper would just go to sleep, but we made the "decision" to have our vet (who is wonderful) help us out. So wonderful, in fact, that she called on Thursday to see if there was anything she could do for Lucy. My hubby is home for a week then at work for a week, so it would have been very, very difficult for me in more ways than one.

We have kept Casper's beds. Lucy is sleeping in them. Something she couldn't do before.

My thoughts are with you. It would be great if Buddy could just bounce back to her own self. She sounds like a sweetie.

Keep us posted.

Judy
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EFerrari Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-13-05 07:14 PM
Response to Reply #16
17. Thanks, Judy
Maybe things will be okay for now, maybe not. I sort of don't remember making this deal when I signed on. Selective perception maybe.

Well, I've got her in warm blankets and we've just been sitting together.

Humans, can't live with them, can't live with them. :hi:
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livetohike Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Feb-15-05 09:49 AM
Response to Reply #14
19. So sorry for your loss of Casper WhoDoYouTrust
:hug:

Yesterday, marked the 2 year anniversary of the loss of our dog Ranger. I hope all the good memories you have will ease the grief you are feeling today.
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EFerrari Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Feb-15-05 06:12 AM
Response to Original message
18. The Budster is MUCH better today after her stroke.
You know, I hate posting negative stuff. So, I'm sorry if I just swooped down on this group but I was shocky all weekend. Buddy is my heart.

Today, after two listless days, she did normal stuff! Still a little fuzzy headed but she even did her usual "You're eating? Where's mine?" thing.

So, for Valentine's Day, Buddy got better. That's better than any chocolate or jewel. No comparison.

Thanks guys,
Beth in SF
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livetohike Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Feb-15-05 09:51 AM
Response to Reply #18
20. Great news!
:-)

Hope Buddy continues to improve and is back to normal soon.
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EFerrari Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Feb-15-05 08:41 PM
Response to Reply #20
22. Thank you. No one outside of this group
might readily realize just how much we love these guys.

I've as many mental images of Buddy as I do of my two boys. She's not a pet at all. She's a gift. And she's slowing getting more and more disabled. Well, like any family member, we hang in with her.

Thanks for being here.

Okay, back to scooping litter boxes.

Beth in SF
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