I apologize for dropping out of sight without a word....

[Shallah Kali]

I went into a depression, start to come out of it, stuff happened, more depression, a relative pass on, more old associated stuff hit me, family stuff happened, repeat. And throughout most of this my therapist has been ill unable to see anyone. so I did what I used to do when something like this happened - retreat, avoid, freeze up and obsesses over bad stuff happening to others rather than deal with my own bit of misery all of which make things worse. My therapist is finally well enough to see people so I will get in this week thank the Universe! I was starting to consider looking for a new one to at least tide me over until she was better but it is so hard for me to trust someone enough to properly spill my guts I kept holding back on looking even when I had the energy.

I est post this before I change my mind again worried I am going to depress others talking about depression.

I care about all of ya'll so I am very sorry if I worried anyone.

Shallah

[MagickMuffin]

1. I was just thunking about you ;=D

I was wondering if you were alright, since I hadn't seen you posting lately.

I'm sorry you have been having a difficult time, and I hope things start getting better. I'll send you Light and Love.


:hug: & :hi:

[get the red out]

2. Glad to see you back!

I am sorry you have been having a rough time. Hopefully things will improve for you now.

[OneGrassRoot]

3. It's you!!!!!

I kind of want to cry....in a good way!!! You have no idea how much you've been missed, with good vibes silently sent your way, Shallah.

:hug: :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug:

What a gift to "see" you today!!!! :bounce:

So glad you popped in. I'm sorry it's been such a struggle lately for you. :(

You just take care of you and know we're here and that you're loved.


:hug: :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug:

:grouphug:

[Kind of Blue]

4. You know how much you are missed??? Even a thread

was started :hug:

I'm so glad you posted and no need for apologies. You had and have to take care of yourself. It's really good to hear from you :pals:

[ricochetastroman]

5. Welcome back

It's what happens after a Neptune transit over your Sun has just completed. You may feel like "you've been a fog." But ultimately, it's a rich spiritual experience.

Neptune makes us see life without the mythical boundaries that we used to rely on. Can make you all of a sudden feel naked.

Be well. :hi:

Rick

[Kookaburra]

6. I hope you know how much we missed you

So glad to see you back, and I'm really sorry you've had to deal with all this yucky stuff. Seems like that's the norm for folks right now. I hope you're doing better.

Missed your particular insight.

Peace

:hug:

[MorningGlow]

7. !!!Shallah!!!

So glad you're back! :bounce:

Sorry to hear you've been going through a hard time, though. :( Hope things are finally looking up for you. Hang here when you can; maybe we can help a little? :shrug:

:hug: :hug: :hug:

[Cleita]

8. I'm so sorry you have been in an unhappy place.

I hope things get better and that you can enjoy the sunshine again.

[I Have A Dream]

9. I'm sorry that you've been having such a difficult time, Shallah.

I'm glad that you're back. :hug:

[BlueIris]

10. Poor Shallah. I hope you can stay with the therapist you trust. nt

[mysticalchick]

11. Welcome back, Shallah!

We sure missed you here! I hope that you can see the light and follow it all the way out of the tunnel.

Blessings to you.

[rumpel]

12. Hi Shallah

Glad you are back!
Was wondering what happened..

Much light and healing energies to you.

:hi:

:grouphug:

[hermetic]

13. Hugs to you, Shallah

Just read this the other day, "A new study suggests that Transcendental Meditation may also be an effective way to lessen depression symptoms."

http://latimesblogs.latimes.com/booster_shots/2010/04/depression-symptoms-may-lift-with-transcendental-meditation.html

In hope this helps.

[Sanity Claws]

14. Glad to see you are back

I understand depression. Sorry you went through that.
I find it a constant battle not to sink back into the deep hole.
I hope you don't feel like that. :hug:

[Celebration]

15. a sight for sore eyes!

Hope things pick up for you and you can rejoice and rejoin! Yeah, we missed ya. :hi:

[JanusAscending]

16. Welcome HOME!

[elleng]

17. Happy you've decided to return.

As to depressing others by talking about depression, well, assume we'd deal with it! Its not contagious, after all, I think!

[japple]

18. Dearest Shallah, I am so happy to see you (and Frederic) again.

We missed your enlightening posts. Don't worry about depressing others. That's why we're here--to help each other. We love you and hope you are over the hump soon. Stay with us.

[FirstLight]

19. You've been missed!

It has been a long and difficult winter in many ways for us all...so glad to see you here again. Hope that we can bring you some Light & Love and healing care....

There's lots going on as always, and your voice is a wonderful addition to our little tribe here.
thanks for letting us know you are still kickin'!!!!

:grouphug:

[LiberalEsto]

20. Happens to me too, SK

Depression is hell, and we both know it.
You look physically okay, but inside, you're sick and suffering.
I went through a bad depression this past winter and have only started to perk up recently. Some medication changes helped.
All my best wishes to you for recovery, Shallah.
PM me if you need extra support.
Hugs,
LibE

:hug: :hug: :hug:

[Fire Walk With Me]

21. ...

:hug::hug::hug::hug::hug::hug::hug:

You are not alone. Please stay with us and share your pain.

"Shared pain is lessened; shared joy is increased." -Spider Robinson

:hi:

[Delphinus]

22. Thank you for letting us know, Shallah Kali.

We all care about you, so this is helpful (knowing).

Sending you light to help show you the way through this. :hug:

[Shallah Kali]

23. I haven't retreated from everyone and everything like this in years

it was like months long flashback to my teens or right after my Dad died. I am working to fight the urge to retreat like a snail into it's shell and try to go numb again. I am having more moments when I surface from the depression long enough to feel more normal, less in a fog of pain, and then I can see the cycle and know I will come out of it then I go down again. Oh and I am pretty sure I am hypoglycemic as it gets so much worse if I don't eat at little every couple of hours. I used to be eternally hungry so that no matter how much or what I ate I never felt full. Worked on that in therapy and started not feeling hungry all the time. right now I am confused as I am not really hungry, it is more like a feeling that I will be Hungry and really want to eat in an hour or so, but now need to have a snack to perk myself up.

Thank you all for caring. Thank you.