Fear of personal power/psychic abilites

[Shallah Kali]

Does anyone here ever feel reluctant to be all you can be, so to speak, esp. when it comes to psi abilities because of a feeling deep inside that something dreadful would happen? I have always felt this for many years and keep working on it. I know it comes from past life trauma. So far I have only remembered one life where I was persecuted and killed for having healing talent but I know there are more that I haven't accessed yet. There is just this nagging little snag I keep stubbing my mental toes on that 'they' will get me.

I have met a few people who said they felt similar feelings at times as well. The regressionist I have worked with once listed all the ways she has remembered being done in during various incarnations to let me know I wasn't alone in this. Oh. I had forgotten this but when I went for my in person Reiki attunements I had a small panic attack before hand.

[LaurenG]

1. Yes but I'm finding it easier in the last day or two.

We were all burned at the stake or harmed in the past. In this life I have been called a witch, a sorcerer, delusional, ungrounded, a know it all... You get the picture.

It doesn't seem to matter so much anymore and I find my anger toward those who don't use their own intuition, magnifying. My tolerance is zero and I'm willing to fight for myself and anyone else who is being harmed by others who are mean spirited, afraid and closed minded.

We are undergoing huge changes and things will get very dicey before this time is done. We don't have to live in fear now but those who refuse to see or listen do. I figure if they want my help they'll ask and if not, I am doing what I'm here to do with or without their blessing. This time it's not about them or what they think, it's all about what we're here to do.

:hug:

[Why Syzygy]

6. haha!

Glad to know I'm not the only know it all around. Evidently, I'm in good company. :D

[davsand]

2. I remember the early days and feeling like I was "breaking the rules" somehow.

I can only describe it as feeling like I did when I was a kid and I did something I just KNEW my parents were not gonna like (smoking that first cigarette, for example.) It was like I was being "bad" somehow and was gonna face disapproval for it.

It felt that way when I bought my first book on numerology. It felt that way when I had my first Tarot reading, and later when I was gifted with my first Tarot deck. It sure felt that way when I first threw for anyone else, and when I started to buy Tarot decks.

I can't even BEGIN to describe how it felt the first time I was in a New Moon Circle or discussing Goddess worship with people, and I still get the screaming willies about discussing religion with certain people...

In each case, and every step of the way, I was moving a little further from what my family had shown me and into turf that was completely new to me. I think a certain amount of caution is not necessarily a bad thing, and I think recognizing WHY you feel that way is vital to any-body's survival and progress.

YMMV, but my advice to anybody is to listen to that inner voice when it is talking and then figure out if that voice is talking out of fear of the new and unknown or is telling you to be on guard for a reason.



Laura

[Shallah Kali]

3. I agree it is important to figure out what is a real warning and what is just useless fear

There is healthy fear and caution and then there is useless fear from various sources. The level of fear on this when it would kick in was so strong I knew it wasn't just newbie anxiety. It was a feeling of impending doom that if I learned this or tried that 'they', not that I knew who or what THEY were, would going to somehow get me and do something terrible. My Dad was always curious about metaphysical things so disapproval from parents, if not the rest of the family, was never an issue. When I first started reading of reincarnation I figured it must come from past lives which gave me encouragement to work through the fear instead of avoiding it. It rarely crops up these days and then usually just a bit of anxiety. It is just that every so often it does and once in a great while it hits hard as when I got my in-person Reiki attunements. For some reason my online attuements did not trigger anxiety. Maybe it was coming out in public like that even if it was obviously with like minded people.

I brought this up now as I am working on devoping my ability to manifest things that i need and as I was working through the various feelings that came up such as guilt for wanting anything beyond the basic necessities of life up came a bit of old anxiety that I would attract negative attention over this. {sigh} time to peel another layer of the onion.

[Brewman_Jax]

4. Happened in my family

my mom was a talented Tarot reader, good enough to do it for pay. Some years ago, she read for a pregnant friend of hers who wanted to do some strenuous/semi-dangerous event (I forgotten the event). My mom's reading said no, don't do this. The MD said go ahead, have fun. The MD guessed wrong, mom's reading was right. The seeker had a miscarriage some days later. That freaked my mom out so badly that she put down the cards and never took them up again. She projected her fears onto my brothers and I.

[Why Syzygy]

5. I always thought

those feelings came from my hyper-religious upbringing. I went way "right" for awhile. Fear was the motivation. I started homeopathy while in that condition, and was very wary. I read everything I could get my hands on. One of the old timers wrote that homeopathy would rid one of their "passions". I didn't like that, as I rather enjoyed my fanatical world view. Since I was out of conventional options, I tried it with much trepidation. It worked, so I had to give up my hesitations. I still to this day believe that homeopathy was instrumental in awakening me from that fanaticism.

Even though I had left the "right" path for good a couple of years before attunement, I had the same type of fear about Reiki.

I also still do not believe that homeopathy and Reiki should ever be undertaken lightly. Both can induce huge life changes. More of a healthy caution than fear now.

I know exactly what you're talking about.

[Shallah Kali]

7. I am glad that you found homeopathy so powerfully healing

While I have not personally gotten such results everyone is different which is why there are so many techniques out there :) My Dad found homeopathy helped a signifigent amount after he got cancer and had nerve damage from surgery. The pain doc and other docs would never give him enough pain medication no matter how many times we asked. My Dad was the sort to wait until he was in agony before mentioning he had a bit of pain so when he said he hurt he HURT. Well I wondered what I could find that would be safe for him to combine with his conventional treatments and he already was getting accupuncture from a wonderful lady so I read up on homeopathy. I found a couple things that most closely matched his symptoms and figured at worst I was out a few bucks. Thankfully it gave him some relief taking the pain down a couple of notches. He would make sure I got more before he ran out of the first tube saying he really noticed a difference if he forgot a dose. When someone's pain level is through the roof even a 10-20% reduction is wonderful and especially so if it does so without adding another couple nasty side effects to the dozen already at work.