What would you think of a guy who sent you this link...

[crispini]

in response to a personal ad? ;)

Warning: some nudity.
http://homepage.mac.com/rjmotivated/PhotoAlbum1.html

[RevCheesehead]

1. And Crispi will be happy to give you the links to the nudity, too!

:evilgrin:

I think his name must be "Lars" or "Sven." :rofl:

[gkhouston]

2. bwah!

Not. In. A. Million. Years.

[crispini]

4. It gets better...

his website....
http://www.hometown.aol.com/rjmotivated/index.html :rofl:

[gkhouston]

5. he should relocate to DC

it's a higher-rent district.

[bleever]

38. He and Jimmy-Jeff could have their own freakin'

cable news show there. Suggested title:

"Correspondents with Benefits".

[CC]

3. So exactly how did you find this

RJ? :evilgrin: After I picked myself off the floor from laughing so hard? Think, I would be too busy laughing and running as fast and as far as I could. I would have to change my email, user name or whatever that I came across him on because I would laugh too hard every time I saw his name. :rofl:

[crispini]

6. I got a wild hair and posted an ad on CL.

What can I say, I figured it'd be fun. RJ has certainly provided some laughs! :rofl:

[CC]

7. You'll have to share anymore

that come up like RJ. Not sure what CL is but betting it is like everything else, a lot of digging through lots of dirt but a diamond could show up in there.


BTW when I saw the thread here it was listed like this


when I answered it ended up like this

[crispini]

8. LOL! "this link" and Tom Delay, I love it!

:D

[CC]

9. Its the Crispi meets her

goal after having seen Cloud 2004 and the lounge thread that had me laughing so hard I was in tears.


I have got to get to bed, windows will be here early in the morning. God forbid I be a sleep who knows where they would end up.

[gkhouston]

10. so is RJ

the dirt or the diamond? :evilgrin:

[CC]

15. To me,

dirt but someone must of thought he was a diamond because it looks like he has a little boy. Just wonder if they get a chance to look in the mirror with out having to hog tie him away from it.

[gkhouston]

18. he has a child? Poor thing.

Having a narcissist for a parent has got to be hell.

[Berry Cool]

11. My take on the guy?

Flakier than an Amish piecrust.

Uh, he will wrestle with you...or you can watch him wrestle someone else. If you like to watch. "Choose any wrestling style, theme or fantasy." Uh...yep. :rofl:

Oh, and how he describes his "Signature Plus Massage": "This massage is the joining of bodies in the highest rapture. With pleasure I offer you a bead of sweat, a seductive twist, a flushed face, curious positioning, and a combination of wildly pleasing deep pressure with feather-soft fingertips you won’t want to miss."

It's that "curious positioning" thing that gets me.

Why am I getting scary mental pictures of Bill O'Reilly and a loofah?

And there is that one picture on the "Personal Training" part of the site...you know which one I mean.

As for the "Digital Photography"...it makes me wheeze.

And if you think that's great...the MASSAGE REVIEWS.

"It almost defies description. RJ seems to combine massage with a sensual and erotic dance. The feeling is unlike anything I've ever experienced before. He is well built and caring, periodically checking with me to make sure I was enjoying myself."

"It was amazing and more than satisfying to have his godlike hard body gliding and twisting over mine."

"He uses all of his body, sliding over every part of you."

"His body is solid as a rock so your muscles feel every muscle in his body as he glides over you like an angel."

"He used almost every part of his body to massage every part of my body."

"When the massage is over, ask RJ to do his 'chair' trick!"

"Many times you are face down wondering just what body part of his is actually being employed at the moment..."

As Keith likes to say, "The joke writes itself."

[Gogi]

12. He's only 5 foot 6?

There were plenty of 400 pound Missourians at the local Ponderosa today who could squash him flat. Definitely a Napoleonic Complex.

[crispini]

13. Hee hee hee hee hee hee ....

Exactly! :rofl:

[gkhouston]

14. hee. You obviously took more time

to arrive at your conclusions than I did. Perhaps we were being a slow learner on purpose? :smoke:

[Botany]

16. The man is nuttier than a Squirrel Turd.

His ads might as well say .... go out with me once and I will make your life a
living hell of stalking, being held against your will, and endless talk about me.

Real guys don't pose for pictures like that ...... The man is a walking bag of issues.

"It is like having the power of water falling off the river's edge drowning the
senses and refreshing the spirits."

And did he go to the Gull Bay School of really bad writing?

The breeze came across the San Francisco Bay and with it the smell of the ocean. The wind
lightly tousled her hair as the setting sun bathed her in an amber glow as she leaned up against
the pier by Fisherman's wharf. Crispini sipped her wine as the wind and the sun highlighted her
natural beauty, yes she was a vision of heaven on earth.

A man who had been watching her from afar strode toward her and said, "If our paths are supposed
to cross let it be here and let it be now."

[crispini]

17. ROFLMAO!

Exactly! The Gull Bay school of really bad writing! We should give an award. :rofl:

[Botany]

20. Come with me and feel the powers of the waters

You and me .... you can watch as as I flex under the waterfall ..... and you can be reflected
in the warm glow of manliness.

Please tell me that you did not give any personal information to him.

[gkhouston]

22. oh but she did

she told him her favorite color of fuzzy handcuffs.

[RevCheesehead]

23. Where, oh where is that trashy romance novel cover site?

I'll look for it and be right back. :evilgrin:


Oh, and "nuttier than a squirrel turd" - :rofl::rofl::rofl:

[gkhouston]

24. longmire romances, wasn't it? n/t

[RevCheesehead]

25. Crispi - check this out, and see if RJ is on one of these:

http://www.worldoflongmire.com/features/romance_novels/

[crispini]

26. Bwahahahahaha!

"The Love Bum" :rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl:

[WolverineDG]

31. LOL

:rofl: "Is it beastiality if they're only watching?" :spray: Those Kangaroo covers are the funniest!

dg

[gkhouston]

19. he is NOT a walking bag of issues

he's a hand-standing naked bag of issues. ;-)

and how many squirrel turds have you inspected, anyway? :shrug:

[Botany]

21. Plenty

[Patsy Stone]

27. RUN AWAY!!!!!

My .02. :hi:, girl!

[Botany]

28. He is a hooker too.

RJ's Signature Plus Massage
This massage is the joining of bodies in the highest rapture. With pleasure I offer you a bead of sweat, a seductive twist, a flushed face, curious positioning, and a combination of wildly pleasing deep pressure with feather-soft fingertips you won’t want to miss.
A 90 min. Signature Plus Massage is $315.
2 hour Signature Plus Massage is $420
3 hour Signature Plus Massage is $630

Crispini,

Look for $25.00 I will give you one paragraph of soft core Gull Bay .....
pictures included.



The man wrapped in towel and fresh from the shower strode across the bedroom
towards the double bed as candles cast a flickering light on the wall. Crispini looked
at him and thought about her most inner needs and she rose from the bed and picked
up the phone, "Hello Dante's Pizza? I would like to put in a carry out order." With that she
flipped on Keith Olbermann and told the man to make himself useful and go get her pizza.


the joining of bodies in the highest rapture???? :rofl: in Ohio we call that humping.

[RevCheesehead]

32. Nice to see you again, Dr. Smoooooooth.

If you really loved her, you'd do it for free. ;)

BTW, did I ever tell you that you're my favorite? :rofl:

[Botany]

33. What free pizza?

ah ..... no :rofl:

[crispini]

34. Bwahahahaha!

You are, as always, a Class Act. :thumbsup:

[gkhouston]

36. ROFL

I know that brand!

[WestHoustonDem]

29. I hope that's not Friday's date! n/t

[crispini]

35. No, no, no. Thank goodness.

:P

[WolverineDG]

30. I agree with Pats

:wow:

RUN, CRISPY, RUN! FAR, FAR, FAR AWAY!

dg

[bleever]

37. I only hope I'm not too late to warn you that under no circumstances

should you sign "Power of Attorney" over to this man.


:)

[crispini]

39. Bwahahahaha! nt