Man doused in burning grease by wife in Mississippi dies

[jobycom]

http://www.sunherald.com/mld/sunherald/news/local/15204602.htm

HANCOCK COUNTY - Charges facing Edna May Sanders were upgraded to murder Friday, when her husband died from severe burns sustained during a domestic dispute last week at their Diamondhead home.

The 45-year-old woman is accused of dumping a pot of blistering-hot grease on her sleeping husband, leaving him with third-degree burns on more than half of his body.

Sherman Sanders spent a week clinging to life in the burn center at the University of South Alabama in Mobile. After his death late Friday afternoon, county investigators intensified the search for his wife.

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This is a follow-up on a recent thread:

http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=show_topic&forum=364&topic_id=1805990

[Tin Man]

1. Deep frying - more proof that it really IS bad for you.

sorry about that.

[jobycom]

2. YOU know, there is a poster on the other thread who knew the victim

Just sayin'.

[Bluzmann57]

3. Without knowing a lot about the case

I still hope that the woman is captured and gets a long long stretch in the Mississippi State penal system. There is absolutely no justification for a crime such as this. None.

[jobycom]

6. Not much has been revealed

There's a lot of discussion on the other thread about whether he might have been abusive, and what kind of abuse would justify this. No evidence, just speculation. There is a poster near the end who says she knew the victim, and that he had asked for a divorce and the woman just flipped. Rare, but I'm sure it happens. If the latter is the whole story, Parchment is too nice for her. If the former, I'd have to hear the full story. I'm sick to death of people I know being beaten or murdered by husbands because no one will believe a wife or do anything to prevent abuse. So IF that's the case--and there's no reason to think it is, so far--I'd have a lot more sympathy. Right now both are hypothetical situations, and so I haven't formed a full opinion.

[etherealtruth]

7. I, too , am sickened by spousal abuse ...

However, regardless of what this man could have conceivably done (if anything), his death would have been a tortured one ... one very horrific to imagine.

[jobycom]

15. No question

It's a horrible act.

In general, I would say that a women in a deadly abusive relationship who fears for her life, and maybe her children's lives, has few options. Stabbing, beating, fighting back, anything short of her shooting him while he sleeps (if he has a gun) may result in her death. What does she do, let him kill her because the only way she can find to fight back is horrific? Obviously she should go to the police, but the graveyards are full of women who did, and were failed.

This may not apply at all to this case. We have a poster who says it doesn't, and I have no reason to doubt him/her. Just saying, in general, that the alternative is sometimes just as horrible. I have two acquaintances in the grave because they couldn't fight back (both were my parents age) and a best friend who barely survived, and whose husband was never prosecuted, and just moved on the next wife. There were three husbands for whom boiling in hot grease wasn't extreme enough, in my opinion, if it could have been done beforehand, to save a life.

This woman may have no such excuse, and if not, she deserves the worst of punishments. Just sayin', I like to understand things before I decide. It costs nothing to make sure.

[etherealtruth]

4. Hideous, horrifying, horrendous ... n/t

[MrSlayer]

5. They should dunk her head in a McDonald's fryer.

One ill turn deserves another. What a cowardly thing to do to someone.

[opihimoimoi]

8. Was she a Battered wife??? It would help to explain things...

What was the husband like for the wife to do this horrific deed?

[calico1]

9. That's my feeling too.

If it's a "Burning Bed" type situation then I too would be more sympathetic. But I would need to know more about the story.

[Sapphocrat]

25. Yeah, but...

And I speak as one who has a lot of sympathy for anyone who's been battered/abused (and spent one terrifying night moving a woman, her kids, and everything they owned out of their apartment before Abusive Hubby got home), I just can't get past the brutality of frying someone to death.

Same with Faith McNulty burning her mister to death while he slept: If you're going to kill him, for God's sake, be more merciful than he ever was! Shoot him in the head if you absolutely must, but torture...??

Know what I'm sayin'?

[calico1]

31. Yes, of course. n/t

[Cessna Invesco Palin]

10. Battered?

And... uh... deep fried, perhaps?

:hide:

[AngryAmish]

18. Post of the Day!!!!!

[IntiRaymi]

21. You need to fix that sense of humor.

[jobycom]

11. A poster in the other thread says she wasn't, that the poster

knew the victim. Other than that, it's all speculation. Even that is a bit of speculation. I've known families where abuse was well hidden. But, again, no evidence has been released either way, and no one with the Sheriff's office has released any possible motives--they are still trying to find the woman.

[Porcupine]

14. Because women never kill or abuse out of regular meanness......

It HAS to be a man's fault. :sarcasm:

If you have any information indicating that this woman was defending herself from an active attack by her sleeping husband while she heated a large pot of oil and poured it on him please post it.

Otherwise it appears to be a knee-jerk, sexist, excuse for horrific behavior. NOBODY desrves to be burned in this way. The "he did someting bad to her last week" crap just doesn't wash. No man would ever attempt that as a defense in a murder trial for good reason. No woman should propose it.

[opihimoimoi]

17. I only asked a question because battered spouses exist

She may have some serious mental probs...and, on another note...she may have a hidden boy friend and wanted to rid herself of the present hubby.

No one knows cept for those 2 one of which just passed in a horrific death.

[IntiRaymi]

20. No it doesn't.

Murder is inexcusable. And he was sleeping when this happened.

[opihimoimoi]

22. Is she crazy? some kind of syndrome? Its usually sick peeps who do this

kind of horrific crimes...just my inquiring mind....

[ContraBass Black]

29. It's also possible that he was a battered husband and intended to

Escape. We know nothing.

[madmusic]

32. FUCK!

Talk about blaming the victim! Man, you people spout about the blaming the victim ALL THE FUCKING TIME. Fucking hypocrites.

Ever since I learned the feminists got "the right to confront" witnesses flushed down the toilet, I have no sympathy any more. I'm pissed!

A woman can can call 911, cry spousal abuse, clean out the bank account and take off, and the husband could get busted and thrown in jail and she would never have to testify. Her 911 phone call could be enough evidence against him.

Fuck that! It's as cowardly as pouring hot oil all over a SLEEPING man.

How fucking chicken-shit can you get?

And you want equal rights.

[RagingInMiami]

12. I bet he never envisioned this

When he vowed "till death do us apart."

[senseandsensibility]

13. I'm wondering why none of the news articles, including your

link, include a picture of the woman. The articles say that she's at large, and your link says the police are asking for the public's help in locating her. But no picture? No physical description?:shrug:

[jobycom]

16. This is from a local Mississippi paper, I haven't seen it make the MSM.

Diamondhead is a development on the Mississippi Gulf Coast, and was in the path of Katrina. The local paper, the Sun Herald, is decent, but this hasn't become a national story, that I've seen. They may not have a picture of her. Or they may have one in the print papers but not online. I haven't checked the tv websites, or the New Orleans news sites to see if they've got the story.

Interesting, isn't it, that the wife who shot the preacher in Tennessee was such a big story, but this one isn't. The media has inconsistent criteria for choosing their obsessions. I wonder how many domestic violence murders happen a day, as opposed to how many make the national news?

[sweetladybug]

19. In my opinion, there is NO excuse for doing this to another person

If she was abused, she should have gotten the hell out of a bad situation. The is coming from a lady that has been married to the same man for almost 36 yrs. 5 yrs ago my husband was in an explosion and was burnt over 50% of his body. He almost died and was in a coma for 6 wks. Watching him go threw all that he went threw I would not wish this on anyone, not even my worst enemy. He couldn't do anything to me to cause me to even want to throw scolding grease on him. If my husband mistreated or abuse me in anyway I would get the hell away from him (hide from him if needed and have the law on his ass) People that stay in an abusive relationship are choosing to stay in an abusive relationship. There are ways to get out if they choose to get out.

ps My husband is doing great now, he's even back working full time
Gayle

[jobycom]

23. You ever tried to get out of an abusive relationship?

Not saying this is what happened in this case (I keep repeating that because I don't want anyone to think I'm defending her, especially without knowing anything).

Some men don't let go. They follow you. They find you whereever you go. Two years later you are relaxing for the first time in years and suddenly he's grabbing you behind the neck and throwing you through a closed sliding glass door. Watch the news, the papers are full of dead women who tried to get away, to just leave, to trust the cops. How many stories have you read where a violent husband murdered two step kids in front of their mother, then killed her, then killed himself? Would you think that watching your children die would be less painful than being burned to death? How about the gu a couple of week s ago who kidnapped his girlfriend's young son, tied him to a chair, and set it on fire, then left the body there until the police arrived?

The hell there isn't any excuse. The hell there isn't.

[Cronus Protagonist]

28. I'm reminded of Andrea Yates

It's not just the males that do shit like that.

[etherealtruth]

24. I am so glad to hear that your husband is doing well

What a horrendous experience for him to have gone through.

Though I don't agree that a battered woman can necessarily extricate herself from the abusive situation ... I do agree that death in this manner is nothing short of horrendous torture.

Again, I am so glad to hear of your husbands recovery.

[progressivebydesign]

27. You really don't understand domestic abuse..

do you? For anyone to flippantly say that a woman should just "get out" of an abusive relationship just like that, has never experienced it, or maybe just never understood it. The point of an abuser is to KEEP the victim around. That's the game for them. Beat, apologize, Beat, apologize, insult, apologize. It's like the analogy of a frog put into boiling water.. well, it's gonna jump out immediately. Put a frog in cool water and slowly increase the heat. It will die without trying to save itself. That's what domestic abuse is like, for either sex. It's a person you love who abuses you, then begs for forgiveness. It's a person you love and has supported you in the past suddenly finding all kinds of things wrong with you, and you believe them because they are supposed to be your closest friend. Abusers isolate their victims, by finding ways of descrediting friends and family to the point that the victim feels alone and unable to get help.

No one here knows if this woman was abused. She could have just been homicidial. Women are getting more violent as society gets more violent... But I do know that thinking a victim can just walk out on domestic abuse shows a lack of knowledge about it. It would be unbelievably helpful to the world if everyone learned more about domestic abuse, the live you save could be that of a friend or relative.

[madmusic]

33. Yeah, a frog in heating water.

That's our Constitution.

Ribbit. Ribbit. Boilit.

[guinivere]

26. What a horrible way to die.

I hope they find this woman.

[OPERATIONMINDCRIME]

30. Again, What A Sefish Evil Bitch. It Takes A Hell Of A Cold Person To Do

something like that. May she never see the light of day again once justice has been served.

What a poor guy. That is one shitty friggin way to go man, sheesh.