Sometimes I don't think I represent progressives very well.

[Puglover]

Yesterday I was driving home from work and there were cop cars every two inches down Cedar Ave. President Moron was flying into town for some reason. Probably a fund raiser. Anyway that put me in a foul mood so when I pulled up to my house I was abit twitchy. College Pro Painters are working on my trim and I shared some choice words with them about * on my way into the house. Anyway the supervisor said in somewhat of a cool voice, "Well, I lean very very right." And here is where I don't think I do very well representing anti-war progressives.

Now take note this guy is probably 27, built like a brick shit house, very very buff. I immediately went for the throat and said, "Wow, very very right huh? How come you're not in Iraq? I mean don't you think you should go and protect us against the terrorists?" He stammered and didn't really answer me. And I was disgusted and went inside. (He probably peed in my paint) <sigh> I wish I could keep my temper better but it's getting ridiculous that anyone could defend ANYTHING this asshat of a unelected moron does. Any thoughts? Suggestions?

[xchrom]

1. shrugging -- i think you did exactly the right thing.

why isn't he there?

this. is. an. elective. war.

you have a right to your anger -- especially after this long -- and it going this badly.

[katmondoo]

2. This is my problem too

I can't control my temper with these people, even with my own son whom I love dearly. It is best for me,to say nothing. Some people can argue with reason I cannot.

[Earth_First]

3. I've had the same problem in the past...

Sometimes you can only be pushed so far before veberal reason leads way to verbal confrontation.

I've been working on it.

[acmejack]

4. I'm 54 & my entire life I've admired those who are calm, cool & collected

Unfortunately, I'm not one of them. I've tried, God knows I've tried. Write it off to being a person of passion. You are what you are, bite your tongue if you can and know you are smart if you can, but people like him deserve to be called. Why isn't he walking the walk?

[mrreowwr_kittty]

5. At least you managed something coherent

I get so enraged in the presence of a Bushbot I can barely choke out a complete sentence. What really sucks is the bastards will bring the shit up when you're in some kind of social or work situation where it's awkward to get into a full-blown row.

I just console myself these days by thinking "34%" over and over......

[Puglover]

6. It didn't feel very coherent. I just felt pissed.

Here is young guy who obviously has it going on. He is spouting this bullshit at me and I doubt he even fucking knows WHY he "leans very very right." Probably because he's listened to way to much Rush or it gives him a hard on thinking of the macho fighting the terrorists bullshit. And that is about as deep as it fucking goes. And that is precisely why I get so sad and pissed and also why I wish I could remain calm and say SOMETHING that might make someone like him fucking think and not just piss him off.

[mrreowwr_kittty]

7. The White Guy Ignorance Bubble

That's what I call it. And Rush and Glen Beck et. al., reinforce it by assuring them that everything wrong with the world is the fault of (insert convenient scapegoat).

Personally, I think what you said is perfect. Guys like him can't stand being called out on their failure to act on all their heroic posturing. He's probably still seething about it. As he should. Guys like him need to hear it as loudly, and often, as possible. Next time you see him explain to him what a Chickenhawk is. Then call him one every time you see him.

Forget trying to make him think. Ain't gonna happen. Our only hope with these types is to shame them.

[nmliberal]

11. I found one 'solution' to awkward situations

I also get too worked up (knot in my stomach, tense shouldors, lack of coherent response) most of the time. When I worked at a cancer treatment center, I finally came up with a response I could make and still keep a smile (inside and out): "Well, we sure see that differently."

On occasion, I am able to maintain a sense of caring for whomever I'm speaking to and can calmly respond. I'm tring desperately to increase these resonses and reduce the babbling idiot ones! Sometimes, as an exercise, I listen to the hate-mongering Rush and practice staying physically calm.

[mrreowwr_kittty]

15. That's perfect!

Especially if said with a raised eyebrow and slight shake of the head. Many thanks, I'm going to use that.

[ms liberty]

8. You're not alone...

It's almost impossible for me to keep my cool and be reasonable with these morans. I just don't have it in me...I care, I'm frustrated and angry, and I don't have any more patience for idiots.

For what it's worth, I think you did ok - after all, that guy was in YOUR yard, doing work YOU hired him to do. You had the right to say anything you wanted. He should have kept his mouth shut if he didn't agree with you.

[meganmonkey]

9. It's totally understandable

to have anger right now, and you gotta get it out. Even if taking it out on this guy isn't the most 'rational' way to get it out, please don't beat yourself up about it - there is nothing rational about killing innocent civilians for no fucking reason and destroying our own country's economy in the process...

I participate in a daily protest in my liberal town, and occasionally we'll get someone who wants to argue. Generally its pretty easy, because there is NO reason for all this so they spew their talking points and we shoot them down, they call us commies and walk away....

Well, one day, we got a live one. All the Limbaugh talking points. He said that no one lied about WMDs and that Katrina wasn't Bush's fault blah blah blah. Okay, so the guy doesn't have his facts straight, big deal. One of our guys started talking with him and it was okay. Then he started talking about Christianity vs. Islam, and how violent Islam is and how "they" hate us and our way of life and how "they" want us all to die. One of our women got a little feisty about that and called him a fundamentalist and that some of the most horrible violent people in the world have been Christians, and torture isn't Christian. And granted she was a little emotional, but she was reasonable, and he started getting an attitude with her (funny how he communicated fine with a male but not a female).

But when this guy announced that there was NO TORTURE I fucking lost it. I asked "What do you mean, no torture?" and he said "Flushing the Koran down the toilet isn't torture!" And I went off - "How about sodomizing INNOCENT TEENAGERS WITH A FUCKING BROOMSTICK? Huh? Is THAT torture? If you don't think THAT is torture than YOU ARE A SICK FUCK and YOU should be LOCKED UP!!!"

I lost it on the guy. It wasn't pretty. Then he told me that we were in the minority in this country and I started blathering about 33% approval and you live in a dream world and if you want to stay deluded go right the fuck ahead it sure makes it easier doesn't it? I hope your Ambien helps you sleep at night go home and listen to Rush Limbaugh and let him tuck you in you are happily supporting the deaths of hundreds of thousands of innocent people and babies being born deformed in ways you can't imagine....

I felt AWFUL that night. I cried the whole way home, I couldn't believe I lost my shit like that, not only because I am usually a level-headed person, but mainly because, like you, I felt like a horrible representative of the anti-war movement.

But I posted about it on another message board I hang out at, and this is what some people told me, and it made me feel MUCH better:

---Remember Jesus in the temple with the money changers? He got ANGRY and overturned all the tables and LOST IT!!!

Feel better now? noone is perfect!! Don't you think you deserve a break? You said you've stood outside now for how many days holding the signs and talking to how many people? And ONE time you lost it with a guy who has an attitude and most likely disrespect for most everyone but (well I won't go there) and doesn't think that torture is an issue?

Holes are for vermin. You aren't a critter or vermin, so STOP IT! Stop beating yourself up.

Unconditional love. Always remember that love bares all things (even though this isn't an example of needing to bare anything, IMHumbleO).

---You were angry for a reason and I'll give a giant hug for choosing truth over violence.

As to the tone you used for expressing this truth?
I honestly don't know if polite expression spoken with passion
is more effective or less effective than truth expressed in anger.
Until I know the answer to that I have no right to scold you.

I suppose somewhere between lies the balance

---Are you sure you didn't "find it"? The guy deserved everything you sent his way and more. Why do protesters think they must be polite and controlled? No fucking way. The guy deserved to be hounded, berated and belittled. Of course it would be nice to be nice and calmly discuss the facts, and with some you can, but with idiots like the one you so rightly confronted only a board to the head will do.

Geez I hope one day we'll hold signs together. I'm not into the passively allow someone to abuse me stuff. Anger is a virtue.

---Thank you for taking the time to stand with others against the insanity which is Iraq. Thank you for standing on the side of children and women who have no control over what is happening to them.

Thank you for standing in my place. I can't do what you do for fear of what I would do to such an asshole. I can't look into the face of such stupidity and ignorance without becoming enraged. It is truly best that I not stand with brave and courageous people like you. I've tried but I do not have your self control.

Thank you for not hurting this fool.

---You weren't a poor representative at all and I just want to thank you for expressing my thoughts to that buffoon.

For every idiot who tells you to play nice, there are 10 of us cheering you on and joining you. It's time to stob being silent.

I want to thank you and other posters here for letting me know I'm not alone. When it comes time to choose between the silent co-dependent enablers and brave people, I'll be standing next to you.

Don't be ashamed of how you reacted. It was just pent up anger at having been told to shut up and play ball for so long. If you crawl in a hole, I'll crawl right in next to you.

You'll get no spanking from this grandma, just a thank you.




So there is a sampling of the wise words I got when I got pissed and freaked on someone. I take them to heart. I try to stay centered, but there is no reason to apologize for speaking truth and being passionate.

I copied and pasted most of this stuff from the other board, so I hope it flows okay...Bottom line - you are not alone and you should not be sorry.

:hug:

Solidarity!

[Puglover]

10. Wow Megan

thanks for your heartfelt and very very well thought out response. I'm mostly sorry for the complete disconnect that SOME people feel about this war. Later I was talking to a couple of the kids painting and one of them asked me why I cared so much about the war. WTF??? I simply told him that I was his age around the end of the Vietnam war and was against that as well. I then added that now we know what a farce it was and how tragic the senseless deaths were on BOTH sides. I said I just hate like hell that my generation is foisting this horror on your generation AND the innocents in Iraq over a pack of lies. This very nice kid looked at me and said. "I don't think your generation is foisting anything on me." and went back to painting.

:banghead:

[meganmonkey]

12. Those kids will learn the hard way

Someday, when we hit bottom and have to start paying our debts (not just $$$, but also what we owe the world for the horror we are foisting on everyone else...)...or maybe even sooner, if there is a draft.

They'll learn.

There's like a mental block - no one wants to recognize the horror of it all. No one wants to recognize their individual responsibility as Americans for what is happening. But that is the reality. And hopefully just one of those painters will get a clue about it from what you said, will look into it further, will talk to their wacky cousin or uncle who is anti-war and get the real scoop...

Planting seeds - that's all we can do sometimes. Where I live, 'everyone' is against the war - we get told all we are doing at our protests is preaching to the choir. Well, if they are in the choir, why aren't they standing out there with us? IMO the only way we will change this is if we seriously get in the streets for days at a time - not just Saturday afternoon permit events but real protest - so we can get real press coverage. If we get bigger in my town, get more press, other towns may follow suit, that's our theory anyway. But these people won't stop for 15 minutes to hold a sign on their way to dinner ('I'm starving - I have to go eat', they say...), it is SO frustrating. So I got a sign made that says:

HOW BAD MUST IT GET BEFORE YOU JOIN THE PROTEST?

Planting seeds. That's all we can do :)

We'll get there someday.

:patriot:

[Puglover]

14. And speaking of drafts.

http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=364x1966571

I honestly believe it is coming.

[MoonRiver]

13. I lost it a long time ago. Bout 6 years and counting.

I am somewhat more able to keep my rage from flaring up uncontrollably now. I think it's exhaustion more than anything else. Still, I will sometimes go off when I smell right wing ignoramuses in the vicinity. My husband thinks I'm going to get us both killed someday. :D But I believe these fools are all cowards underneath their pea brained bully facade. I despise them to the depths of my soul, but really, getting angry at them is not worth my time. At least this is what I keep telling myself.