Erika
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Sat Sep-02-06 02:03 AM
Original message |
OK... What happened to the Rapture? |
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We had the Israel war which was supposed to bring the Rapture, etc. The fundies said W would bring the Rapture, etc. Just where is the Rapture?
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Bluebear
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Sat Sep-02-06 02:03 AM
Response to Original message |
dipsydoodle
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Sat Sep-02-06 03:32 AM
Response to Reply #1 |
magellan
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Sat Sep-02-06 02:04 AM
Response to Original message |
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Too many wanted in who weren't worthy.
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Kutjara
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Sat Sep-02-06 02:08 AM
Response to Original message |
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I'm up here in Heaven, having a fantastic time. You would not believe the mojitos that JC is whipping up at the Perpetual Pool Party.
Don't tell me you got left behind?
Gotta dash now. Richie Valens is about to start his set. I want to get a good seat (but then, they're all good seats).
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Syrinx
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Sat Sep-02-06 02:12 AM
Response to Reply #3 |
4. tell Bear Bryant I said hi! |
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What do you mean he's not there? ;)
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lvx35
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Sat Sep-02-06 02:31 AM
Response to Reply #3 |
filer
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Sat Sep-02-06 02:19 AM
Response to Original message |
5. It's could happen any day. |
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I hope the fundies have changed their undies.
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Arugula Latte
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Sat Sep-02-06 11:51 AM
Response to Reply #5 |
30. They won't need 'em -- |
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They're gonna be NEKKID when Jebus sucks 'em up to Heaven! :woohoo:
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filer
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Sat Sep-02-06 01:00 PM
Response to Reply #30 |
34. That'll be a sight for sore eyes, |
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thousands of naked goobers soaring into the blue. I'll want front row seats for that one!
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Why Syzygy
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Sat Sep-02-06 02:35 AM
Response to Original message |
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hysteria inducing death in some in 1000 AD? Been awhile since I read about that.
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eviltwin2525
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Sat Sep-02-06 02:50 AM
Response to Original message |
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Would they PLEASE hurry up and have their FUCKING rapture, already? And leave the world to people who actually give a shit about it?
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snot
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Sat Sep-02-06 03:17 AM
Response to Reply #8 |
The Straight Story
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Sat Sep-02-06 03:09 AM
Response to Original message |
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It ain't rapture until it all comes tumbling down at once.
And things have to get a lot worse in several other areas as well beforehand.
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Zhade
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Sun Sep-03-06 07:14 PM
Response to Reply #9 |
CC
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Sat Sep-02-06 03:22 AM
Response to Original message |
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which one's sect?:nosmileyforrollingtheeyesindisgust:
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HarukaTheTrophyWife
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Sat Sep-02-06 05:49 AM
Response to Reply #11 |
19. What about this smiley? |
CC
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Mon Sep-04-06 02:11 AM
Response to Reply #19 |
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and not quite snarky enough.O8)
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CC
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Mon Sep-04-06 02:14 AM
Response to Reply #19 |
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Edited on Mon Sep-04-06 02:14 AM by CC
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autorank
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Sat Sep-02-06 04:05 AM
Response to Original message |
13. Oh "E" of little faith;) It happened, the remains are nasty pod people. |
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They're non stop bots who will be neoons forever...and they don't die.
Sorry, I'm a TruthTeller in the bank of the eternal positive balance.
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prole_for_peace
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Sat Sep-02-06 04:58 AM
Response to Original message |
14. i thought i read it was postponed until Sept 12th. |
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it was a thread on du.
i don't know much about the rapture but is anyone supposed to know the day and time? i thought it was supposed to be a "surprise".
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RC
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Sat Sep-02-06 05:04 AM
Response to Reply #14 |
15. It's a surprise only for us heathen non believers. |
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The believers always know when the rapture is coming, no matter how many they have lived through.
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EFerrari
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Sat Sep-02-06 05:04 AM
Response to Original message |
16. Really! What happened? I was counting on the rapture. |
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There's too much cheese whiz around here and not enough parking.
lol
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Philosoraptor
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Sat Sep-02-06 05:05 AM
Response to Original message |
17. It happened already, but only 32 folks made it to heaven. |
and-justice-for-all
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Sat Sep-02-06 05:43 AM
Response to Original message |
18. The Rapture is pretend... |
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Just like G-D, Jesus and religion in general.
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RebelOne
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Sat Sep-02-06 05:49 AM
Response to Reply #18 |
20. The wackos at RaptureReady.com don't think |
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Edited on Sat Sep-02-06 05:50 AM by RebelOne
it's pretend. They are eagerly awaiting it. They think that any day now, Jesus is going to zap them up to heaven.
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and-justice-for-all
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Sat Sep-02-06 05:58 AM
Response to Reply #20 |
21. Raptureready.com is a great laugh... |
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They can believe that all day long, but their theocracy is getting in my democracy and I dont particular care for that very much....
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RebelOne
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Sat Sep-02-06 06:01 AM
Response to Reply #21 |
22. I visit Rapture Ready when I need a good laugh. n/t |
Why Syzygy
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Sat Sep-02-06 11:29 AM
Response to Reply #21 |
29. It really pisses me off sometimes. |
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The BIBLE doesn't even teach the RAPTURE. Some crazy dudes made it up in the 19th century. This is the TWENTY-FIRST CENTURY folks. Drop it already. And it sure does get in the way. They are so sure they are going to escape the destruction of the planet, they just don't give a damn!
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and-justice-for-all
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Sat Sep-02-06 06:29 PM
Response to Reply #29 |
35. I know the Rapture isnt in the bible.... |
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Thats what makes it so funny...and I am fully aware that it is also the 21st Century; silly dogmas and redicules superstitions (that are continuesly fed to people in order to maintain control of the weak minded) are an endangered species...
Religion is a dinosauer trying to survive in an enviroment that it is no longer needed in.
Religion ruled once...it was called the Dark Ages.
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Why Syzygy
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Sun Sep-03-06 04:21 PM
Response to Reply #35 |
37. I was yelling at them. |
and-justice-for-all
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Sun Sep-03-06 06:57 PM
Response to Reply #37 |
ClintonTyree
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Sat Sep-02-06 06:44 AM
Response to Original message |
23. Shoot, the "rapture index" is only at 158......... |
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Edited on Sat Sep-02-06 06:46 AM by ClintonTyree
2003 High 177 2004 High 157 2005 High 161 2006 High 160 2003 Low 133 2004 Low 135 2005 Low 143 2006 Low 151
Record High 182 Record Low 57 24 Sept 01 12 Dec 93
It looks like they're going to be waiting a while. I'm sure they're bitterly disappointed. Cheer up guys, if anyone can hasten the end of the world as we know it, it's your boy Bush! ;)
On edit: it looks like the all-time "rapture low" occurred during the Clinton Administration. How could that be? I thought he was the devil incarnate? :shrug:
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mcscajun
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Sat Sep-02-06 08:37 AM
Response to Reply #23 |
28. Myabe They think Clinton was the devil incarnate... |
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...but only Bush is actively working to Bring about the Rapture, or so the fools think.
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ms liberty
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Sat Sep-02-06 06:55 AM
Response to Original message |
24. God postponed it; it will be rescheduled at a later date |
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He decided he couldn't cope with those assholes right now.
Interviewed recently, God commented, "Hey, I'm only a God you know. Those people would get up here and start hounding me all the time about everyone they think shouldn't be here. All I'd here from them is 'Who's that Ghandi puke? Why's he here and not the sainted President Reagan?' and 'Hey, that Mohammad guy is a MUSLIM!'" God added sorrowfully, "How they could screw up my message so thoroughly is beyond me. Didn't I tell them that the whole judgement thing was my job, not theirs? I'm tempted just to wash my hands of them, but none of the other deities want anything to do with them, either. And my Son! Well, Jesus is just livid! Every time he goes down there to check on things, something terrible happens. In the last five years he's been captured and tortured in Gitmo and Abu Ghraib, rendered and tortured in Uzbekistan and parts unknown, and drowned in New Orleans. I may have to unleash my wrath just to cleanse the planet of those idiots!"
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deutsey
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Sat Sep-02-06 07:00 AM
Response to Original message |
25. You'd think fundies would remember that Jesus himself said |
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no one knows (including himself) when the End will come, only God.
It's right there in their Bible...but then again, so is all that stuff about loving your enemies, caring for the poor, and seeking peace and justice, and they do a great job of ignoring all that, too.
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Nightjock
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Sat Sep-02-06 07:37 AM
Response to Original message |
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a little "Wake and Bake".....
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mcscajun
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Sat Sep-02-06 08:35 AM
Response to Original message |
27. Ticketmaster knows... |
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Edited on Sat Sep-02-06 08:38 AM by mcscajun
Rapture Pre-sale begins November 2, 2008 You will need your RaptureReady™.com or ChickTracts™ Pre-Sale passcode to purchase your Rapture pre-sale tickets. Opening Act: REM (in some venues)
Don't bother checking Ticketbastard's site...In the words of Foghorn Leghorn: It's a Joke, son!
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ruggerson
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Sat Sep-02-06 11:53 AM
Response to Original message |
31. It will occur in thirty business days |
Tierra_y_Libertad
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Sat Sep-02-06 11:58 AM
Response to Original message |
32. Cancelled due to lack of funding from the believers. |
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The preachers underestimated how much they could make off the suckers. Not to mention the high cost of condos in Heaven.
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leesa
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Sat Sep-02-06 12:17 PM
Response to Original message |
33. Fortunately, the Israeli wars just go on and on so the Rapture predictions |
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are never on hold for long. Last date I heard was September 12th.
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WritingIsMyReligion
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Sat Sep-02-06 06:31 PM
Response to Original message |
36. Some nutjob thinks it's going to happen on September 12th. |
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I'm hedging my bets that if a rapture happens, only the neocons will be left behind.
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RebelOne
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Sun Sep-03-06 07:54 PM
Response to Reply #36 |
45. But other nut jobs thought it would happen on August 22. |
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There are a lot of disappointed nut jobs right now.
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TheFriedPiper
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Sun Sep-03-06 04:27 PM
Response to Original message |
38. uhoh, don't upset the rapturists, they got thin skin! |
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They get pretty bent out of shape when you suggest to them that they shouldn't ever drive, since they are willingly (at least they believe) putting others at risk of them being raptured while moving down the highway, causing accidents and death.
Maybe they just figure we 'left-behinders' deserve what we get for not being 'good christian death cultists'.
Maybe they really don't believe as much as they profess to.
After all, faith is a man's belief in what he knows to be untrue.
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Rainscents
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Sun Sep-03-06 04:28 PM
Response to Original message |
39. I thought, it was on Aug 22??? |
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What happened? Did God forgot?:eyes:
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guinivere
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Sun Sep-03-06 05:15 PM
Response to Original message |
40. Cancelled. Too many concession and vender problems. |
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Plus the white rapture gowns weren't ready.
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pitohui
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Sun Sep-03-06 05:59 PM
Response to Original message |
41. heh it didn't happen did it? |
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i see i heard the same theory as you, that it would come to pass between aug 22 and sept 2
oopsie
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PresidentWar
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Sun Sep-03-06 06:01 PM
Response to Original message |
42. I can't believe I slept through it. |
RebelOne
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Sun Sep-03-06 07:56 PM
Response to Original message |
46. I wish it would happen soon. I could sure use |
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Edited on Sun Sep-03-06 07:57 PM by RebelOne
a new car, preferably an abandoned Cadillac El Dorado or even a Mercedes would do fine.
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and-justice-for-all
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Sun Sep-03-06 07:57 PM
Response to Original message |
NMMNG
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Mon Sep-04-06 02:19 AM
Response to Original message |
50. Same place it's always been and always will be. |
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In the fertile imaginations of fundamentalist whackjobs.
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DU
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Thu Apr 18th 2024, 02:36 AM
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