"I'm sorry, I'm mute."

[Prisoner_Number_Six]

I'd been sick all week, and I hadn't had anything to eat in two days. So I finally decided to go to the Subway Sub shop for a sandwich.

While ordering the toppings, I looked up and found myself suddenly, silently enraged. The young man behind the counter had a small piece of white paper scotch-taped to his shirt. "I'm sorry, I'm mute." is what was written there boldly in black ink.

I do not know what the story was, but I can imagine the worst- "Okay, so you can't communicate with our customers. They have to know why you're not speaking. Here-" the boss scrawls something on a white scrap of paper- "wear this if you want to keep your job."

The young man looked a bit depressed to me- forced to proclaim his "handicap" to the world in order to satisfy customers. "I'm sorry. I'm mute." I wanted to say something- I shoulda said something, but I didn't. Who was responsible for this insult? Who should I yell at for this unwarranted branding? Could I have done the slightest bit of good by speaking out for this silent person?

In the end, I paid for my sandwich and left. Not knowing how to correct this insult, I remained mute.

It isn't just the little paper sign taped to a boy-man's chest. It's a far, far deeper slap upon our collective face. Remember where we are and what's going on in our nation. The next thing pinned to our chests could be Stars of David, or pink triangles, or even a big red "T". It's open season. You're different, they get to brand you. Muslim. Suspected Terrorist. Parolee. Thief. Sex offender. Arthritic. Deaf. Anything.

How long do we let this go on? How far do we let it go before we stop it? What has to happen before we remember who we are and what we used to stand for?

How long before we all just scrawl that one little sentence on a scrap of paper and tape it to our own chests in explanation for our failure to act?

I'm afraid I have no answer to that- the look in that young man's eyes says he knows he's in for a long, rough life if we don't turn back soon. I sure hope we do- it's a life I wouldn't wish on anyone.

"I'm sorry, I'm mute."

[jody]

1. Could the young man have been deaf-mute? Would not that have altered

your reaction?

[Prisoner_Number_Six]

4. Not in the least.

There's a deaf girl behind the counter at one of the Starbucks I go to occasionally. She needs to wear no sign. Besides, the boy was not deaf, as he was the one taking my order for extra toppings. I watched hi- he was NOT reading my lips. And it would not have made any difference at all. An insult is still an insult (to the person forced to wear the sign, not to me).

[MoseyWalker]

2. I've read quite a few of your posts

and this is one of the best.

good post!

[Prisoner_Number_Six]

7. I'm occasionally inspired

Not often, I admit. But once in a while something naturally boils my blood.

[skipos]

3. Someone at my grocery store wears something like this by choice

so they don't have to explain themselves to custromers over and over, day after day.

[Prisoner_Number_Six]

5. It's not even the sign, per se

It's the "I'm sorry" part. A forced public apology for being who and what he is. It set my teeth on edge.

[Truthiness Inspector]

9. I replied before I saw this

so I understand now that you are pissed about the "I'm sorry" part of it.

I agree with that.

[Prisoner_Number_Six]

11. I had intended to make that clearer in my orignal post.

I'm sorry I didn't. :evilgrin:

[blonndee]

19. I got it. That's sad that such a thing merits an apology

these days, as though it's something to be ashamed of, or even some kind of inconvenience to others? How would we feel if we had to display all our challenges and differences to the whole world?

[jwirr]

17. That of course is the real issue. He had nothing to be sorry for.

The sign did probably help him with impatient customers. One thing to remember: not too long ago the company would not even have given him a job. Now all they have to do is learn how to communicate this without insulting him.

My daughter has no formal means of communicating and often people will come up to her to be nice - say something and then wait until she responds. That is when I step in and explain that she never learned to talk but that if you watch her eyes you pretty much know what she is thinking.

[pinto]

6. A suggestion. Ask *him* about it. I'd bet he'd be glad to tell you

what's what.

[Clark2008]

15. Um.... how is he going to do that?

Do you think his boss will let him stop and write out a response to that question?

I think I'd talk to the manager and ask him or her why his/her employee is wearing that - is it by choice or the manager's inability to handle differentiation.

[pinto]

20. That's an option. I just figure it's best to go to the source.

And if he's wearing a label he's approachable without making it a big issue. Personally, I'd tell him I noted the message, thank him, and tell him I appreciate it and it wasn't necessary for my business...Then see what he "says". Yes, he may need to write it out. Or make himself understood with a gesture or two. If he chooses to "say" nothing, I'd let it go.

[Truthiness Inspector]

8. Maybe the guy wanted it there?

Before you get too enraged, maybe the mute employee wanted customers to know so they wouldn't yell and flap around, when he couldn't communicate back. Just something to consider.

How is he supposed to tell them he is mute if he can't talk?

Go back tomorrow and ask the manager. Better yet, go back and try to communicate with the mute employee so you don't end up possibly costing him a job, have him write his answers if that needs to be the means of communication.

[Prisoner_Number_Six]

10. He's probably gonna be mute for a long time.

He could easily have something quietly personal and permanent made. Being forced to tape a written sign to his chest apologizing for it could NOT have been his idea.

[EST]

13. I applaud your better instincts, especially the warmth

you display toward fellow humans.
Is it possible, however, this time, that you are jumping with a paucity of information?

[liberalhistorian]

14. Exactly! Like I just said in my post below,

THAT is the main problem with the sign, there is NOTHING to be sorry for. I've apologized enough in my life for my hearing problem, my learning disability, and being bipolar, NO MORE. One thing having a disability makes crystal clear is that too many people are uncomfortable with any kind of "disability" and we then, therefore, have to "apologize" for it, over and over, when it's not our fault and there's absolutely nothing we can do about it, short of a medical miracle. If people have a problem with it, tough shit, that's their problem.

It's no longer my problem. I quit apologizing a couple years ago, and have never felt better about it.

[liberalhistorian]

12. You have a good point and normally

I would agree with you. Especially as I'm hard of hearing and wear hearing aids and I get pretty damned tired of explaining that to people over and over again, all fucking day, whenever I misunderstand something or have to ask someone to repeat themselves.

But, as the OP said, it's the "I'm sorry" part that is particularly galling and infuriating. A simple "I am mute and unable to talk to you" would have sufficed. There is no reason at all for him to be sorry, and no reason why that should have been included. If I had ever been required to wear a sign such as "I'm sorry, I'm hard of hearing" or some such, or if I ever am in the future, that particular employer can take their sign and their medieval attitude and shove it right back up their ass. I don't care how much I may need the job.

I've endured enough these past twenty years of wearing hearing aids, since college, and I've apologized enough to people for it when I never should have had to do so in the first place. It is not my fault I'm hearing impaired, and I will no longer make any apologies for it just to appease people or make them less uncomfortable. And neither should this young man. There is NOTHING to be "sorry" for, except that our disabilities may make some people uncomfortable. Tough shit. That's THEIR goddamn problem, not ours. There's nothing we can do about our disabilities, but people can change their attitudes.

[Truthiness Inspector]

16. I agree with you 100%

see posts #9 and #11, though.

NOBODY should have to say "I'm sorry" for a disability.

[liberalhistorian]

18. You're absolutely right, and I think

people with disabilities, no matter what kind, are really starting to wake up to that, to how often we're expected to "apologize" and do so with a cheerful smile plastered on our face. To hell with that!

I LOVE your username, btw!!

[pinto]

21. Good point.

[lumberjack_jeff]

22. Being a contrarian is in my nature.

As a volunteer for The Arc, I'm pleased whenever I see someone with a disability gainfully employed.

I would have been off-put by the sign as well, but I see the difference between the sign you described and "trainee - please have patience" as somewhat subtle.

Perhaps it would be worth calling the manager, expressing your appreciation that he hired the young man then expressing your concerns. :shrug: