Please caption this George Allen Family Portrait

[Wickerman]

:rofl:

[Burma Jones]

1. I ALWAYS bring a football to a beachside bar......

and it's a 4 by 6 inch painting??????

[maseman]

50. Ahhh...no dark people on THIS beach

[karlrschneider]

2. Wow, a 4 by 6 inch painting!

:eyes:

[DemocratSinceBirth]

4. It's 4 Feet By 5 Feet-LOL

eom

[vogonity]

47. Insert Spinal Tap "Stonehenge" reference here (EOM)

[karlrschneider]

53. The reference is lost on me but I did notice the surfer boyz seem to be

enjoying each other's proximity. :evilgrin:

[vogonity]

55. I should have worded it better

There is a hilarious scene in "This Is Spinal Tap" where the band designs a stage prop that looks like a big Stonehenge monument thing. Well the band member sketches it out but makes the dimensions something like 12" high x 6" wide instead of 12' (feet) high x 6' (feet) wide. The band first sees the new prop when it is lowered down on thee stage. One foot high by six inches wide.

[karlrschneider]

56. Ah, okay I get it. Didn't see the movie but I understand now.

:D

[berner59]

3. those poor kids...

I'd be so embarrassed if I were them...the blurb says the painting is 4x6 INCHES but it's really 4x6 feet...can you imagine walking into the house and seeing this QUEER painting???

Why is there a high heeled shoe sitting on the patio with a bird on it??

[Sequoia]

11. And the children have those snobby annoying last names as first names.

[ProgressiveEconomist]

26. Those names are not just annoying--they may be treasonous

A DUer who went to school with Allen has posted that all Allen's children are named after KKK and confederate antiheroes: for example, (Nathan Bedford) Forrest, co-founder of the KKK.

[Sequoia]

38. As for Brooke and Tyler:

Brooke Rifle

A Confederate Brooke Rifle is fired regularly outside of the National Civil War Museum at Port Columbus. The gun was built in 1865 at the Confederate Navy Works in Selma, Alabama, and was brought to the Confederate Navy Shipyard in Columbus for use on the CSS Jackson.

http://www.georgiaencyclopedia.org/nge/Multimedia.jsp?id=m-8379


AND


Robert Charles Tyler: Last American Civil War Confederate General Slain in Combat

http://www.historynet.com/magazines/military_history_quarterly/3038531.html?featured=y&c=y


So there you go!

Edit: Well heck, I just read the next post. Well, exc-c-c-c-cuse me.

[ProgressiveEconomist]

61. Great links! I learned a lot. You've taken it farther than I had.

On edit: I just had an idea for a google, and it worked!

"who was who in the confederacy" got 37 hits.

The next step in trying to show that Allen must have intentionally named all his kids after KKK-confederate antiheros could be to find the frequencies of Forrest, Tyler, and Brooke in the population of first names, and compare those frequencies to a consensus of the positions of those names in the Confederate who was who.

[ProgressiveEconomist]

37. Forrest, Tyler, and Brooke--what are the odds that all three names

would just happen to coincide with such prominent names in KKK and Confederate history? See http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=show_mesg&forum=364&topic_id=2156858&mesg_id=2158216 .

[turbo_satan]

5. The caption...

"Former Senator Macacawitz and his family in exile in the Cayman Islands."

[thereismore]

6. Felix is the cat, obviously. A swell-looking family, if you ask me. nt

[canadianbeaver]

7. Nice to see faux news on the TV behind them eh? eom

[central scrutinizer]

8. Where is that Macaca with my margarita?

Those darkies are so lazy! Maybe a deer head in their mailbox will get them to fucking move!

[verse18]

9. Ugh.

Their watching Faux in the background of the painting. On the damn beach!! That is truly sickening.

[tridim]

10. Is that Hastert behind Tyler, playing the ukulele?

No maccacas at that private beach club I see.

[AspenRose]

66. I thought it was Rush Limbaugh

:rofl:

[Ian David]

12. Notice they're watching Fox "News" on the TV?

Damn, I hate Republickers.

[Ian David]

13. Here's the painting of Hastert and his room-mates...

[OneBlueSky]

14. sophisticated taste in art, don'tcha think? . . . n/t

.

[DemocratSinceBirth]

15. A True Renaissance Man

eom

[displacedtexan]

16. Does Brooke have a skitty-wonkus eye, or...

...is the artist just that damned incompetent?

That poor little girl looks like hammered shit in that
"painting."

[RobertSeattle]

17. The "Macaca Lisa"

[Richard Steele]

18. DingDingDing!!!!!

I think we may have a winner!

[WillyT]

29. ROFLMAO !!! - Pretty Much A "Scream" Too !!!

:rofl:

[Saphire]

19. Is it on velvet?

[tridim]

20. What's the deal with the bird on the shoe in the background?

Weird.

[Sequoia]

39. He's looking at the cat.

[Javaman]

21. It was impossible to get the whole family together because

they all hate each others guts.

:rofl:

[Selatius]

22. I can't believe his children could become like him when they grow up.

We don't need more closet bigots in America.

[Straight Shooter]

23. That is a truly horrid portrait, for all kinds of reasons.

Someone please teach David Cochran a few lessons in conveying depth in an illustration. He also has the painting split in two, the "horizon" of the painting being almost precisely across the horizontal center. This so-called portrait is an artistic disaster.

Allen's portrayal in this *cough* painting reminds me of when painters a few centuries ago had to be very careful to flatter the subject and not paint the person as they actually appeared. George Allen looks to be 20 years younger than he actually is.

His daughters are gorgeous but his son, unfortunately, looks like him.

I shudder to think of the interior decorating in the Allen home, if they would hang such a monstrosity in their living room.

[YOY]

24. 'I see white people'

Reeeeeeeely reeeeeeely white people.

and what's up with his son named 'Forrest'. I know he loves the confederate flag and all but for a guy who doesn't want to be labeled a racist...having a kid named 'Forrest' is kind of idiotic

[Fresh_Start]

25. Makaka, Makakaina,and the Makakaettes

all fantasy and no substance.

[Marblehead]

27. looks like

Forrest is having a few margarites...

[TheCowsCameHome]

28. Too funny. Limbaugh playing a ukulele and Allen throwing his new baby.

[FSogol]

30. Does the cat have something in its mouth? n/t

[Sequoia]

40. Kinda looks like he does.

But look at his tail against the little girl's shorts. I've never seen a cat with a see-through tail.

What a lousy sloppy artist.

[Judi Lynn]

31. David Cochran must have choked down a LOT of these lil' drinkies

before he could have imagined George Allen looked like his portrait!

[skypilot]

32. What's with...

...the single woman's shoe on the ground next to the guy in yellow? There's a high-heel mule with a bird balanced on it. Strange detail.

[Judi Lynn]

36. And it's within pouncing distance from the ubiquitous beach cat!

Apparently shoe birds don't know about beach cats.

[twilight_sailing]

33. quick take, hope this works

[FSogol]

41. Nice, btw, you forgot the Klan Hoods. n/t

[Wickerman]

44. Nice work!

regrettably, you can tell it's shopped in as you are a better artist than the original! :thumbsup:

[Golden Raisin]

34. Giotto, Titian, Rafael & Leonardo

need not lose any sleep. This is SO red state.

[HiFructosePronSyrup]

35. I watched... a snail... crawl along the edge of a straight razor.

That's my dream. That's my nightmare. Crawling, slithering, along the edge of a straight razor... and surviving.

[berner59]

42. The little girl's elbow...

Looks like part of her sleeve is on her elbow...what a horridly painted job!!

[Bluebear]

43. Where's his yarmulke? nt

[Marr]

45. I wonder... did that artist draw the turtle or the pirate?

[Minimus]

51. that made me laugh!

:rofl:

[Bluebear]

52. me too!

[leftofthedial]

46. they are mighty white

mighty white

[Ignacio Upton]

48. His daughter Brooke reminds me of that girl from The Ring

When that girl was "alive" and little, of course.

[SoCalDem]

49. Who's the goof with the ukelele? Grandpa?? Is he ogling the daughter?

Looks like Paint By Numbers is back in vogue:)

[RDU Socialist]

54. which one in the picture is the one who wrote a book exposing

what kind of dipshit hillbilly asshole the senator was when they were at home?

[Catshrink]

57. Thomas Kincade is doing political paintings now?

same kind of schmaltz. :puke:

[Gabi Hayes]

58. can you get a version in black velvet?

I'd buy one

seriesly

[Starbucks Anarchist]

59. "Only coloreds I like are my blue jeans!"

[Catchawave]

60. I guarantee "you all"...that's not Virginia, heh !

Definitely not Virginia Beach....or Southern California...sooooo

My problem with this lovely family portrait, why not a lovely "Virginia" portrait ? Love her or hate her, Virginia has FABULOUS backdrops on her beaches, mountains and national historical monuments.

Oy vey.

[MazeRat7]

62. Who's the backup band, Tiny Timmy and the Destroyers ?

A Strat and a Ukulele in the same band ? Thats something I hope I never have to hear.

MZr7

[Deja Q]

63. 4x6" painting? That's a postcard. He thinks of his family that little?

:wow:

[Wickerman]

64. shameless night crew kick - I still giggle every time I see this

:kick:

[AspenRose]

65. The "artist" forgot to add a sign like this to the portrait

[lonestarnot]

67. Lattiefuckingdattie. A pic to poop on. Phoney plastic people,

made to look more plastic in plastic art.

[Kurovski]

68. Barbie and Ken in Hell (Right Wing)

Inspired by:



Bosch_Hell (RightWing)