Con "Logic" applied to the real world.

[booley]

For fun, I decided to take some common things cons have said to rationalize Shrub's polices and see how they would do in a real world setting. Tom Tomorrow does this very well in his comics.

This is no means an exhaustive list. One simply can't exhaustively document Bullshit. Others can (and are encouraged) to write their own. I used Iraq but Cons are logic impaired on all sorts of issues so no need to limit oneself.

Con Logic

It doesn't matter if Saddam had WMDs or not, we had to take him out eventually anyway.

Real World

Lets say I shoot someone. I tell the police that the guy had a gun and was about to shoot me so i was just defending myself when i broke into his house to shoot him. The police find NO gun or weapon of any kind on the guy or in his house. There is no evidence that the guy was ever a threat to me when i broke into his house.

Do the Police...
A. Tell me the guy was an asshole and probably needed to be shot sooner or later?
or
B. Arrest me?

Con Logic

Members of Al Queda met with members of Saddam's government once so they were linked. Both hated America.

Real World

I once met Bruce Jenner as a kid. I played sports as a kid.

With the above two statements being true, does that mean i played sports with Bruce Jenner when I was kid?

Con Logic

Saddam had WMDs becuase he had them in 1991.

Real World

12 years ago I was in the Navy and could run a mile in about 10 minutes. I was 23.
Today, being 35, I am also about 20 lbs overweight, don't work out and have arthritus in my knees and hip.

Do you think i can still run a mile in 10 minutes?

Con Logic

We had to invade to save the Iraqi people from being oppressed/harmed by Saddam.

Real World

Police-"Why did you shoot into that guy's house?"

Gun Guy-"Becuase I couldn't stand how that guy threatened his wife and kids with a baseball bat."

Police-"Didn't you give that guy the baseball bat?"

Gun Guy-"Yes."

Police-"And didn't you see this guy threaten his family with that bat for years?"

Gun Guy-"Yes."

Police-"And when he lost that first bat, didn't you give him another, knowing he used them against his own family?"

Gun Guy-"Yes, but this time it bothered me!"

Real World Part 2

Police-Why did you shoot into that guy's house?

Gun Guy-Becuase I couldn't stand how that guy threatened his wife and kids with a baseball bat.

Police-Then why did you shoot into the house knowing you would kill the wife and kids?

Gun Guy-TO SAVE THEM from the guy with the bat!

Con Logic

The Iraqis are better off now then under Saddam!

Real World

Me-"Oh No I broke my leg and the pain is excrutiating. What will I do? I know! I will cut off my leg and therefore NOT have a broken leg anymore."

Con Logic

Just becuase these soldiers were in Iraq and say they saw torture and/or don't think we should be there, that doesn't mean thier words carry any more weight then anyone else's! (Similarily, just becuase someone who lost a loved one in 9-11 or Iraq doesn't support the war...)

Real World

Guy 1-"I have had two doctors tell me I have cancer and need immediate surgery. But I don't know if I will do that."

Guy 2-"Why the hell not?"

Guy 1-"Well My barber said I could cure cancer with leeches. And I just don't know who to trust."

There are many other examples I can give, using Iraq or other issues. And maybe I will later. For now, feel free to add your own.

[stepnw1f]

1. CON Logic:

I need to get a gun before everyone else does, because everyone or anyone is a danger to me... heeeheee! :crazy:

[ck4829]

2. Con logic on clean air

Con Logic: Clean air means allowing polluters to dirty the air and get away with it.

[booley]

3. or to put it another way

The more trash I dump in my room, the cleaner it is!

[EST]

5. Seems more like:

I was going to haul the neighbor's trash over and dump it in my room, but he had already dumped it into his other neighbor's yard. Look at how remarkably clean my room is! (Compared to what it was gonna be)

[hwmnbn]

4. Very nice ........

Your analysis might be considered booleyan logic!

[booley]

6. A few more

This time the free market...

Con Logic

If we make regulations (environmental, safety.whatever) voluntary, corporations will be more prone to do what's right.

Real world

If we make all laws regarding murder or theft or rape illegal, the people who murder or steal or rape will be more prone not to do these things.

Con Logic

We don't need regulation for business. We can just let the invsible hand of the free market guide what happens.

Real world

I don't need to steer my car. I can just get it on the highway and then fall asleep. Magical forces will guide my car safely to work all by itself.

Con Logic

If we give assistence to the poor, they will never learn how to not be poor.

Real world

Sure I could have tossed a life preserver to that drowing man. But then he might never learn how to swim!

Edited to fix my all too common typos