A little Pastor Ted snarking

[splat@14]

Church member Christine Rayes, 47, said "This doesn't make what Ted accomplished here any less. The farther up you are, the more you are a target for Satan."

Yes, yes, Christine. I've noticed that myself. Perhaps there's a shortage of qualified labor and the eternal forces of darkness are having to be judicious in how they allocate their time and resources. I can see the memo now:



From: Hell
To: All Instruments of Satan
"Due to this year's increased attrition and our ongoing shortage of qualified applicants, we must ask all of you to be more diligent in your efforts to increase efficiency and eliminate redundancy. Effective 11/01/06, please remove the following US public figures from your prospect spreadsheets:

Bush, George W.
Cheney, Dick
Coulter, Ann
Dobson, James
Falwell, Jerry
Frist, Bill
Gingrich, Newt
Hannity, Sean
Hastert, Denny
Ingram, Laura
Kennedy, D. James
Limbaugh, Rush
Rumsfeld, Donald

These individuals have been under our control for quite some time and continued efforts on them are a duplication of labor that we simply cannot afford at this time. When you convert a prospect, please update the spreadsheets so our efforts aren't wasted in the future.

Thank you.

Ken Lay,
Chief Operating Officer
US Operations

Comment made by "Dave" on:
http://www.pamspaulding.com/weblog/

[Union Thug]

1. These hypocritical, fundamentalist, fantasy worlders are a wonder

to behold. I don't even know how to respond to this except to shake my head, perplexed, befuddled and a little pissed off.

[AlamoDemoc]

2. Christine Rayes, 47, said ....the preacher told me to do so...

[NightOwwl]

3. Oh, so it's all Satan's fault.

Well, that makes total sense to me. :crazy:

[JohnnyLib2]

4. William J. "Clenis" Satan --

Please keep up!

[Donkeykick]

5. Why don't these people write their own Bibles.

They can call it the Biased Bible (Note: book subject to change quickly in order to prove a point!):eyes:

[noobie2]

6. Although the irony

Although the irony isn't lost on me that Ted is a hypocrite, I initially laughed a lot before it hit me. If you consider that he used to get high before having sex in order to enjoy it more, it becomes clear that the guy has some serious self-hatred issues. For one thing, he will probably say he has a drug problem and blame his homosexuality on the drugs, ala Foley. I think that is the way he rationalizes being homosexual and being an anti-gay preacher in his head. Unlike Foley, I don't think that Ted believes he is gay. That's a helluva lot of cognitive dissonance. Because crystal meth can increase one's libido and decrease one's inhibitions, it becomes real easy to blame the drugs solely. It is a bit of a tragedy because he believes homosexuality is a choice. He'll probably enter himself into one of those bizarre clinics that "make gay people straight," come out and say he's "cured" and the cycle repeats. His kids will suffer humiliation and a wrong view of what has happened. They will think that "dad sinned" as opposed to "dad is a homosexual" and Ted Haggard will never know who he is.

[newyawker99]

7. Hi noobie2!!

Welcome to DU!! :toast:

[SalmonChantedEvening]

8. Thank you for the post noobie and welcome to DU!

Hope to read many more from you!!

:hi:

[noobie2]

9. thank you

thanks