Colbert's Satire Goes Completely Over Catholic Blogger's Head

[Hissyspit]

http://fideidefensor.blogspot.com/2006/11/stephen-colbert-defender-of-faith.html#links

Tuesday, November 28, 2006

Stephen Colbert Defender of the Faith!

UPDATED

I hope you all caught Colbert Report tonight. This should set aside any doubts of his devout Catholic orthodoxy. I can't believe what I am hearing! I wish I could type fast enough to transcribe it, Colbert has proudly identified himself as a Catholic, the "one true religion," he has recited the creed, attacked Ecumenical movements that water down Christian truths, and actually called out Islam for what it truly is! Let me know if anyone gets the Youtube on this. This is pretty darn impressive! I really hope other Catholic bloggers are picking up this story! This is exactly the kind of strong Christian truth that we all need to be voicing, if only all our Priests were so vocal and courageous, and here is Colbert taking this message to the ultra-secular-world!

I know I am a bit prone to waving the Colbert banner more often than I should, but this seemed completely legit, I think we can truly all now confirm that Colbert is a lonely champion of our Catholic values in the secular media!

UPDATE: The show just re-ran I did my best to transcribe Colbert's words, this is not totally accurate but it's about 70% on the spot, I notice a lot of the jargon Colbert uses is obvious "insider" speak in terms of Catholicism, even dare I say, earmarks of the Catholic blogsphere. I wonder if Colbert is a reader of some of the more famous Catholic blogs? I'll keep an eye out for video on this, for now here is the "transcript,"

“My man of the year every years is the pope no matter who he is….Turkey is getting a healthy dose of vitamin B16…upon arrival the Pope spoke today about reaching out to Muslims (Pope’s quote)… Sorry Holiness that is to ecumenical, I liked you better when you were John Paul’s rotweiler… the ecumenical movement seeks to bring people together… the Pope’s visit is designed to bridge the gap between Christians and Muslims…the Muslims are a tad miffed, alright homicidally outraged, over a speech the Pope gave criticizing Mohamed as evil and inhuman…the Pope is trying to make amends and that is a big mistake.. Mohamed happens to be wrong (crowd is a bit shocked Colbert points at audience members and tells them sit back down)….hear me out, I am a Roman Catholic, the one true faith, (the Microsoft of religions) I know Roman Catholicism is the one true faith because Roman Catholicism tells me it’s the one true faith… I am sorry Islam, inherent in my belief is your wrongness… Muslims believe Mohamed ascended to Heaven on a horse, horses can’t fly, Jesus can!… the 72 virgin huggers are going to say Muslims do believe in Jesus, yah they believe that Jesus was just God’s friend, I hate to break it to you but anybody can be God’s friend, even Ted Haggard, God is a people person… the truth is Jesus is the only son of God (recites The Creed to applause) that’s the hometown crowd! Now what I just said is the complete truth or the Muslims are right and I am an infidel. I’ll tell you, the one thing I respect about Muslims is that at least they have the balls to say I am wrong… now when Christians try to be ecumenical we just look weak in our faith… if religions have to agree lets just agree on the one thing we both believe, the other guy is going to Hell!”

The blogger doesn't transcribe Colbert's FULL joke... "I know Roman Catholicism is the one true faith because Roman Catholicism tells me it’s the one true faith..." Colbert then asks rhetorically why should he believe that Roman Catholicism is the one true faith? See the first part of the statement. It's class circular logic fallacy and it's ridiculous and that's the joke. Sheesh. Some people. If this blogger's site is satire, I can't find any sign of it. He links to Drudge.

[fishwax]

1. Well, the blogger does have some points

Colbert is a devout Catholic and he often does use Catholic-insider language on his show ... but beyond that it all goes over the blogger's head.

The attack on ecumenicism, Islam, and the circular logic of blind faith was certainly satire. The breathless recitation of the Nicene Creed was :rofl:

[Hissyspit]

2. The audience cheered Colbert's recitation.

They weren't cheering the creed. They were cheering the fact that he could recite it all from memory... and very quickly, too.

[fishwax]

4. it's hilarious when he does that

and impressive how fast he does it, but it always makes me laugh thinking about how the rote recitation, with little or no reflection, of the creed in catholic mass.

[mduffy31]

5. Hell I joined in

Something about hearing the Creed takes me back the the Catholic School days.

[Epiphany4z]

7. aww hell

I am an atheist and I have the lord pray, the creed, and rosary stuck in my head forever...I can recite it all from memory today and I haven't called myself christian in at least 25 years. That stuff is like riding a bike...it just never leaves you....15 years of reciting it day after day after day....gets it all lodged in your head pretty dam good.

[alcibiades_mystery]

14. Every Catholic or former catholic can recite the Nicene creed from memory

And very quickly. That's the point: you say it super quickly, just like you say your Hail Mary's and Our father's. When recited as quickly as possible, it doesn't mean anything anymore. That's the catholic insider joke. Fifteen hail mary's penance. We used to see if we could do five in a row without taking a breath.

HailmaryfullofgracetheLordiswiththeeblessedartthouamongwomenandblessedisthefruitofthywombJesus
HolyMaryMotherofGodprayforussinnersnowandatthehourofdeathamen
HailmaryfullofgracetheLordiswiththeeblessedartthouamongwomenandblessedisthefruitofthywombJesus
HolyMaryMotherofGodprayforussinnersnowandatthehourofdeathamen
HailmaryfullofgracetheLordiswiththeeblessedartthouamongwomenandblessedisthefruitofthywombJesus
HolyMaryMotherofGodprayforussinnersnowandatthehourofdeathamen
HailmaryfullofgracetheLordiswiththeeblessedartthouamongwomenandblessedisthefruitofthywombJesus
HolyMaryMotherofGodprayforussinnersnowandatthehourofdeathamen
HailmaryfullofgracetheLordiswiththeeblessedartthouamongwomenandblessedisthefruitofthywombJesus
HolyMaryMotherofGodprayforussinnersnowandatthehourofdeathamen
HailmaryfullofgracetheLordiswiththeeblessedartthouamongwomenandblessedisthefruitofthywombJesus
HolyMaryMotherofGodprayforussinnersnowandatthehourofdeathamen
HailmaryfullofgracetheLordiswiththeeblessedartthouamongwomenandblessedisthefruitofthywombJesus
HolyMaryMotherofGodprayforussinnersnowandatthehourofdeathamen
HailmaryfullofgracetheLordiswiththeeblessedartthouamongwomenandblessedisthefruitofthywombJesus
HolyMaryMotherofGodprayforussinnersnowandatthehourofdeathamen'
HailmaryfullofgracetheLordiswiththeeblessedartthouamongwomenandblessedisthefruitofthywombJesus
HolyMaryMotherofGodprayforussinnersnowandatthehourofdeathamen
HailmaryfullofgracetheLordiswiththeeblessedartthouamongwomenandblessedisthefruitofthywombJesus
HolyMaryMotherofGodprayforussinnersnowandatthehourofdeathamen
HailmaryfullofgracetheLordiswiththeeblessedartthouamongwomenandblessedisthefruitofthywombJesus
HolyMaryMotherofGodprayforussinnersnowandatthehourofdeathamen
HailmaryfullofgracetheLordiswiththeeblessedartthouamongwomenandblessedisthefruitofthywombJesus
HolyMaryMotherofGodprayforussinnersnowandatthehourofdeathamen
HailmaryfullofgracetheLordiswiththeeblessedartthouamongwomenandblessedisthefruitofthywombJesus
HolyMaryMotherofGodprayforussinnersnowandatthehourofdeathamen
HailmaryfullofgracetheLordiswiththeeblessedartthouamongwomenandblessedisthefruitofthywombJesus
HolyMaryMotherofGodprayforussinnersnowandatthehourofdeathamen
HailmaryfullofgracetheLordiswiththeeblessedartthouamongwomenandblessedisthefruitofthywombJesus
HolyMaryMotherofGodprayforussinnersnowandatthehourofdeathamen
HailmaryfullofgracetheLordiswiththeeblessedartthouamongwomenandblessedisthefruitofthywombJesus
HolyMaryMotherofGodprayforussinnersnowandatthehourofdeathamen
HailmaryfullofgracetheLordiswiththeeblessedartthouamongwomenandblessedisthefruitofthywombJesus
HolyMaryMotherofGodprayforussinnersnowandatthehourofdeathamen

[Sapere aude]

29. Ever notice how fast Catholics leave the parking lot after church?

Now I am a recovering Catholic and my brother is a priest. I noticed back when I went to church how most of us walked in a trance into mass and did the stand up sit down kneel down thing almost in a trance also. But when the mass ended it was a mad rush to see who could get out of the parking lot first and it was a free for all, every driver for him/herself.

[StraightDope]

36. Lol...

Yeah, I remember that. Italian-American steelworkers and coal miners mostly. Everyone always wanted to rush home to watch football and have Sunday dinner. People were heartless when they got behind the wheel after an hour of droning indoctrination.

[tblue37]

44. My grandfather was an Italian-American coalminer.

Actually, he was a Sicilian imigrant in northeastern PA. Is that where you are from?

[StraightDope]

56. No, but very close...

Northern WV, on the PA border. I was born in Erie though. :hi:

I do believe that the Italian side of my family hails from Naples.

[fishwax]

43. at my parish there were always several who grabbed the eucharist and split

after communion to beat the rush. Like leaving when the team's up in the fourth quarter, I guess.

Sometimes they wouldn't even go back to their seats after communion, just grab the wafer and keep walking right out the door :rofl:

[MrCoffee]

are you telling me he doesn't use a prompter?

[Lisa]

33. I was impressed by his high baud rate!

I'm not Catholic but I thought it was way cool. He spoke very quickly but it was all intelligible. (I've often been told that I talk "too fast" but I think the real problem is that I can't enunciate as well as Stephen.)

I also love his ability to shift in and out of character so deftly -- and I think he got the message across quite well, that one can be a devout follower of a particular religion without being obnoxious about it.

[knitter4democracy]

41. It wasn't all of it, just the part on Jesus.

We recite it at church every Sunday and are supposed to do it every morning and evening during prayers. Ours is a bit different, but it was funny seeing him do it super-fast. :)

[maggiegault]

28. As Far As Catholics Go, He's Pretty Hardcore

And he's adorable, in a nerdy Catholic boy sort of a way. SIGH.

Yes, he is always spot on...cradle Irish Catholic with eight years at St. Lawrence Catholic School under my belt.

The names of his siblings are also all very Catholic. Peter and Paul were killed, along with the Colbert dad, James, in the crash of Eastern Airlines flight 412. I also think that he has a sister named Mary Katherine, which is an uber-Catholic name.

In fact, he very often reminds me of aspects of Catholicism that I had long forgotten...or simply blocked out of my mind!

[fishwax]

35. welcome to DU!

In fact, he very often reminds me of aspects of Catholicism that I had long forgotten...or simply blocked out of my mind!

I know what you mean! :)

:hi:

[fujiyama]

46. I read about the date his dad and siblings were killed on Wikipedia

It was 9/11.

Assuming it's accurate, that's one weird coincidence...

[Richard Steele]

3. Wow. Even the FReepers figured out Colbert was satire after a week or two.

They still don't really grasp what SATIRE actually is,
but they do at least know that he doesn't really mean
what he says.

But THIS guy...wow. Just WOW!

[HarukaTheTrophyWife]

19. Dude...

we had a couple DUers that were confused about Colbert on Election Night of 2006!

[fleabert]

27. My 18 yo, intelligent, funny, cute brother thinks Colbert is a Repube-lican.

I cannot convince him otherwise. As smart as he is, he's so stupid. (He is a Republican, although I doubt he'll ever vote)

[President Jesus]

6. In real life, he is a devout Catholic.

But never mistake "devout Catholic" for "crypto fascist." I've know just as many that were Liberals (if not more) than Conservatives.

[OmmmSweetOmmm]

15. He also teaches Sunday School! eom

[Beaverhausen]

17. I read that in the Rolling Stone interview and was amazed!

[bobbolink]

42. Why would that surprise you?

Maybe he does "The Word" in class every week.

:hi:

[RevolutionStartsNow]

20. Indeed, all 4 of my parents (step-parents included) are devout Catholics

and EXTREMELY liberal. Jesus was a peacemaker. Duh.

My mom and stepdad are currently having some issues with the way the Catholic church is run, but they have been Catholics and people of deep faith as long as I can remember.

[Ian David]

24. Step-parents? Catholics can't get divorced!

HERETIC!

[AspenRose]

25. They can remarry if someone dies....

....and there ARE some provisions for divorce in the Catholic Church.

(you forgot the 'sarcasm' thingy)

[RevolutionStartsNow]

31. LOL!

When my parents originally divorced, they were attending a very liberal church, but still a Catholic church, and they were essentially "cast out" after the divorce. I was very young, don't remember much, except that it was painful and ugly for my parents. They remained practicing Catholics after both remarrying and eventually my mom and stepdad even returned to the same liberal church.

My mom and stepdad especially are both of deep faith, but they certainly disagree with many of the teachings and political admonitions of the church itself. Their faith is very personal and genuine, from my vantage point, and isn't really about "going to church."

[SavageDem]

45. Rev, I'm glad your folks/stepfolks went back...

The only way to change things is from the inside. It's as true with institutions as with people: hate the sin, but love the sinner. So many nuns that I read and hear about spend their lives trying to make change in the way Catholics do business; a ship that big turns slowly.

I like Colbert more and more the more I see him and hear about him. To be able to separate the message from the crazy rituals the Catholics have developed over the years shows insight. It's too bad more people can't see the base truths that constitute most of the world's major religions, chief among them variations on the Golden Rule. Christians, Muslims, Hindu, Buddhist, etc.: we're a lot more similar than different.

[RevolutionStartsNow]

48. You know, I grew up equating the Catholic church with liberalism...

because we went to a church full of young people where my stepdad played guitar in a band that played Paul Simon and Elton John songs. And my parents had a huge tapestry on the wall in our house that read "War is not healthy for children or other living things."

My parents taught me that Jesus was the first peacemaker, and that war is evil. As the Steve Earle song goes, "I don't remember learning how to hate in Sunday School."

I didn't grow up to be a practicing Catholic, at least not outwardly, but I have turned to my faith when I needed it (sometimes in desperation, even), and I have a hard time with the fact that so many people equate religion with conservatism (for example, jumping all over Obama for his comments). While it's true that the Catholic church can be very backward about things like birth control and gay marriage, I still believe that my God is a god of love and peace, and always will be.

The Christian fundamentalists who see God as punishing and non-Christians as heathens have no place in my faith.

[jasmeel]

52. Amen! I'm not familiar at all with religion - grew up in a non church

going family. So unfortunately, outside of what the religious right has told all of us about what Jesus says/believes I know little. That's a damn shame.

[RevolutionStartsNow]

53. That is a shame.

I have kids, and I'm not raising them as church-goers, for various reasons. But I have talked to them a little bit about my faith and what it means to me. I don't want them to grow up believing that Religion/Faith = Religious Right/Conservatism.

[malaise]

8. Half the people who watch Colbert

are clueless re satire.

[Jacobin]

11. It's hilarious

[Donnachaidh]

9. are they going to invite him to speak at a dinner for the Pope?

Like the WH did? I pray that they videotape that one too. :evilgrin:

[ChairmanAgnostic]

13. can you imagine Colbert interviewing the Rat?

wow, I would pay for that show.

[Ian David]

10. Fundies are genetically incapable of recognizing sarcasm or irony...

it's part of the natural mechanism that protects them from cognitive dissonance caused by their own hypocrisy.

[tanyev]

16. New post: They are mystified.

I'd be more than happy to be wrong about Colbert.

But, like The Curt Jester and Gerald Augustinus, I'm just not sure whether his schtick is sincere, or is meant to make those of us who really do believe what he is saying sound like ignorant bigots.

Ding, ding, ding for door number two!

[Morgana LaFey]

51. I think you've got it

But I'd drop "caused by their own hypocrisy." Cognitive dissonance can come from a lot of different arenas -- native stupidity, for one.

[tanyev]

12. Did this guy miss the whole fracas when Colbert spoke at the

Correspondents' Dinner? Maybe he thought he really was praising GWB.

[Abuhans]

18. Haha, I was getting flashbacks while he was reciting

Of being a child bored out of my skull and with back pain on those wooden benches.

[Minnesota_Lib]

21. It's hard to believe someone could transcribe that and not see it was a put on. Wow!

That blogger's stupidity is indeed impressive.

[warrens]

22. OMG, what a moron

Hearing only what he wants to hear. That was a pretty savage slam on Catholicism...and Colbert IS a practicing Catholic.

[BestCenter]

26. Well,

maybe that's why apparently FReepers are into his show, too. I think Colbert's true political leanings are a complete mystery.

[Laurab]

37. I don't think they're a complete mystery

He said in an interview that he voted for Kerry in '04, and I think in that same interview, that he was a Democrat, but that his politics are a mixture of conservative and liberal. He has also said he believes one can disagree with their church on things.

FReepers are just too damn stupid to understand satire.

[frankenforpres]

54. i missed it being a slam on catholicism

colbert was saying that the pope SHOULDNT go to turkey and build bridges with those infidels.

he was attacking the "my way or the highway aspects of certain groups". i didnt take it as a slam on catholicism

[warrens]

23. They missed the main joke: ecumenace as word of the day

Even playing nice with other religions, even if you don't mean it, is evil. He was making the case, satirically, for total intolerance. Trying to be to the right of the pope. "Yes, the pope is infallible, but this time, Your Holiness, you're wrong." I nearly died laughing.

[Lisa]

34. "but this time, Your Holiness, you're wrong" -- perfect!

It was such a wonderful portrayal of an ultra-dogmatic person trying to have it both ways. Classic! I never cease to be amazed at Colbert's talent for letting us know his feelings on a particular topic, even as he solemnly says and does what appears to be the exact opposite!

[Sapere aude]

30. Cobert was making fun of people like the blogger who can find nothing to respect

in other faiths. It's the "only I have the truth" syndrome.

[ComerPerro]

32. further proof that Colbert's RWer impression is nowhere near "over the top" as some may say

[Laurab]

38. Unbelievable - well not so much for a FReep

I loved his whole bit - it was basically just making fun of intolerance. Then he shows a picture of the Pope - it had to be the WORST picture they could find, and says something like "how could you not love a face like that".

I know he's a practicing Catholic, and teaches Sunday school, but I know many Catholics who are liberal and tolerant - I wish I'd had him for my Sunday school teacher, he must be a riot!

[CatholicEdHead]

39. Sounds like he took "The Word" seriously

What was displayed on the screen when he said this? It has to be on YouTube somewhere.

Edit: Yep it is on Comedy Central's web site already. If you cannot pick up the sarcasm (even though Steven is Catholic), you are out there.

http://www.comedycentral.com/motherload/player.jhtml?ml_video=78729&ml_collection=&ml_gateway=&ml_gateway_id=&ml_comedian=&ml_runtime=&ml_context=show&ml_origin_url=%2Fshows%2Fthe_colbert_report%2Findex.jhtml&ml_playlist=&lnk=&is_large=true

[Hissyspit]

40. Another Catholic blogger picked it up:

http://custosfidei.blogspot.com/2006/11/stephen-colbert-is-catholic.html

[eridani]

47. Any known cures for irony deficiency? n/t

[pnorman]

49. WHERE was THAT published? In The Onion?

:rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

pnorman

[Kolesar]

57. &the blogger dutifully transcribed Colbert's speech...hilarious, indeed...eom

[cemaphonic]

50. Heh, well he is a devout Catholic

Just one that regularly calls the Pope a Nazi.

There is an interesting interview with him archived on the NPR website, where he talks about his approach to religious humor (this was when he was still on TDS doing 'This Week in God.'

[hedgehog]

55. My daughter tells me Colbert teaches religious ed at his local parish.

Any idea if this is true and if so, what grade he teaches?

[NoSheep]

58. Oh Lawd!

:eyes: