Freeper Logic on AIDS and sex. Gag alert & Stupid alert.

[Botany]

This nugget sounds like it came from Pastor Jones @ some teen bible class.

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I can provide anyone with a virtual guarantee they can avoid getting AIDS for life for two bits.

1) Put a quarter between your knees, don't let it fall until your wedding night.

2) On your wedding night, put it in your partners pocket.

3) Never sleep with anyone that does not have your quarter in their pocket.

8 posted on 12/01/2006 4:56:48 PM PST by IamConservative
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Not only is this idea stupid but it is very sexist too. "Damn girls just
can't keep their legs together." What is the problem with all these
people thinking about other people's sex lives?

[Redstone]

1. I guess the girls aren't supposed to WALK until they're married, because it's damn hard

to keep that quarter stuck between their knees if they do.

Fucking freeper idiots.

Redstone

[rusty charly]

2. it's all so simple... for them.

must make everything so... easy.

so... cut and ru..., i mean, dry.

[Tandalayo_Scheisskopf]

3. People who worry about what other people are doing with their genitalia...

Just ain't doin' enough with their own.

[magellan]

4. A quarter won't help you if your spouse is unfaithful.

But you will be able to call someone who cares.

[benny05]

8. That's the best line I've read all day n/t

[mondo joe]

5. And then when your partner gets AIDS and gives it to you...

:barf:

[JackBeck]

13. Exactly. Because you can't get AIDS from anyone.

No one gets "AIDS" from their partner. I'm so sick of hearing from the media that you can get AIDS from someone. It's so ill-informed.

[bluestateguy]

6. That's such a realistic piece of advice for people who don't get married until they are 40

To say nothing of what that means to gay people who cannot obtain the benefits of legal marriage in 47 states.

[Warpy]

7. Funny he doesn't mention what to do with the MALES

It's all women's fault, I guess, even though male to female transmission is much surer than female to male transmission.

I've taken care of too many faithful wives who got it from husbands on the low down or sneaking IV drugs.

[cynatnite]

9. Oldest daughter said superglue can do wonders to keep a man

from having sex. Of course, she had just kicked an ex-boyfriend to the curb for cheating on her at the time. She was pretty pissed.

[Warpy]

14. My parents knew someone who had that done to him

by a wife who was sick of being cheated on.

He ended up in the hospital for quite a while and needed plastic surgery with skin grafts.

Just tell her if she ever does it, she'd better have her plane tickets and passports and be on her way out of the country for an extended vacation.

:evilgrin:

[Buzz Clik]

10. That bit of brilliance goes back forever.

Stupidity is immortal.

[Sapphocrat]

11. "Freeper Logic"

That's a good one! Adding it to my big list of the best oxymorons. LOL

P.S. That freeper you quoted? I bet nobody wants her lousy quarter.

[melnjones]

12. Hey, I'm Pastor Jones!

Pick a different name! :-P

[BlueIris]

15. ...egh. I...can't believe someone posted that. Anywhere. It's 2006.

Almost 2007. My GOD.

[ironflange]

16. What's to keep Hubby from bringing it to the bridal bed?

Oh yes, he's had a quarter between his knees too. Wait, something doesn't add up. . .

[yurbud]

17. and who really believes they follow this kind of advice? And where is the pocket on a sheep?

[Der Blaue Engel]

18. Shouldn't you stick a quarter up your *ss, too?

Here's another idea, you freeping half-wits: use a goddamn condom. Sheesh.

[don954]

19. no wonder they are all so full of shit!

couldn't resist.. ;)

[JackBeck]

20. I don't get it?

Care to explain?

[don954]

21. if they have to keep their legs together all the time....

even in the bathroom...

[JackBeck]

23. You mean like Condi?

Who has looked constipated for as long as I can remember?

Sorry if I got a bit defensive. As a gay man who was once a bartender, I have plenty of gay jokes filed away and I thought you may have been a bit provocative when clearly you weren't. So I apologize.

[Dastard Stepchild]

22. This would TOTALLY work...

The muscle atrophy I would experience from laying on my bed with a quarter between my knees for a minimum of 9 years (counting from the first day of menses) would make it virtually impossible for me to not only not get HIV/AIDS through sex, but to actually have have any form of sexual intercourse involving my nether region.

Excellent! :thumbsup:

[uppityperson]

24. I remember an AnnLanders thing about both ft on floor and aspirin between knees

I always wanted to send her a copy of The Joy of Sex or even just a drawing and explanation that missionary position isn't the only way.

[Jamastiene]

25. I've always heard about using a nickel.

I guess the dumbasses figured in inflation or something. :eyes:

[NMMNG]

26. Funny how there's no "wait until marriage/stay faithful" warning for the guys.

Typical sexist BS with unrealistic "save it until marriage" (even if you don't get married until you're 40) tripe. :eyes:

[Blix Krieg]

27. Hmmmmmm

Are you quite sure the virtual guarantee wasn't referring to males?

partners pocket? :wtf:

[JackBeck]

28. Not in this case. They're referring to women keeping their legs shut.

But since freepers are highly obsessed about boy on boy action, you could be on to something. They do seem fixated about figuring out how guys engage in intercourse.

Seems to me you seem focused on a guy keeping that coin between his "partners pocket". Wonder why?

[newyawker99]

31. Hi Blix Krieg!!

Welcome to DU!! :toast:

[MnFats]

29. maybe im wrong but i seem to recall positions that...

......positions that would permit sexual congress even with the knees tightly together. Maybe it's been a while and i just hallucinated that but...

[Warren DeMontague]

30. Not in freeper-land.

It's ALL missionary, lights off, grimace and think of Jesus for 20 or so seconds.