It appears that the holiday blockbuster for 2026 will be the tragicomedy, "The Tragedy of George II." Now, I don't want to get your hopes up about the acting or special effects, but I've seen the script, and there are some great lines that might make some lucky actor quite famous. I've exerpted my five favorites below -- don't worry, no spoilers here!
Quote #1:
George: Santa, I want to show that we need to accept responsibility for America's unique role in preserving and extending an international order friendly to our security, our prosperity, and our principles--by attacking Iraq!
Santa: You'll shoot 46,880 U.S. servicemen and servicewomen's eyes out, kid. {Kicks George down a slide}
Quote #2:
Rummy {singing with Condi, Dick, Denny, and Joe dancing behind him}:
Saddam, with only ninety-eight rounds,
Will get sand in his face when kicked...to the ground.
And soon in Tikrit, with a translated sheet,
The sweat from his pores, as we pack him with gauze,
We'll make him listen...and scream
And with phosphorous...and just a little bit of flame
He'll think and come clean
He'll be a strong man, oh honey...
But the wrong man
He'll use dangerous chemical weapons and use UAVs
Try to build up his Republican Guard, his sons, and al Qaeda
Such an effort...if he only knew of my plan
In just seven days,
I can give Bush Iraq,
Oh yes I can!
Quote #3:
George: I thought you said your dog did not bite!
Prime Minister Nuri al-Malaki: That's not my dog.
Quote #4:
Jim "Bones" Baker: Iraq's dead, George.
Quote #5:
George: You don't understand, Russ. I could've had class. I could've been a contender. I could've been somebody, instead of a bum, which is what I am, let's face it.
Vote for your favorite!
By the way, I hear that tickets will be $388.50. BYOB.
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