As a man---whould I allow myself to get raped by gunpoint?

[trumad]

That's a tough one.... Oh sure, I'm all big and tough in typing that I would fight to my death---but then again, I'm not facing the barrel of a 38.

I think I'd have to beat the fuck out of the rapist.

mho

[mntleo2]

1. You'd Most LIkely Submit

...men do it all the time in prison, and nobody even has a gun in there ~ though lets face it, you would get "shanked" if you resisted there. It is a horrible crime but the truth is that submission means keeping your life. As a victim I will tell you, I am still glad to be alive and I suspect my family will tell you they are glad I am still alive too.

Cat In Seattle

[virginia mountainman]

2. Don't even try..

Get a CCW {concealed weapon permit), like my wife and I have, and use your OWN gun.

A .45 trumps a fist anyday!

[itsmesgd]

3. thankfully, no one would want to have me

I heard a comedian say that if he were arrested he would do two things: punch the first guard he saw and yell that his AIDS was acting up.

[brentblack]

4. So women are just weak??

What are you implying? Are you saying that women do not resist or even enjoy it?
Are they just 'allowing' it to happen??
Yours is a rather misogynistic post...


Sometimes one must make life or death choices that effect other people such as our children or spouses.

[NorthernSpy]

15. oh, please....

He said none of those things, and you know it.


I will say this, though: the cultural stigma for adult male victims of sexual violence is truly profound. I suspect that for many men the only possible choices in such a situation will seem to be either fight to the death (literally) or never breathe a word of what happened to anyone (while, perhaps, forming some kind of plan for eventual revenge).

[Scout1071]

16. And you think it's any different for women?

Oh please yourself.

I suspect that for many men the only possible choices in such a situation will seem to be either fight to the death (literally) or never breathe a word of what happened to anyone (while, perhaps, forming some kind of plan for eventual revenge).

You don't think that women face the same choices? You don't think that some women fight to the death? You don't think that women shamefully keep it to themselves and keep it a secret?

But, gosh, it must be oh so much more difficult for a man to be raped.

[NorthernSpy]

18. I AM a woman, and I KNOW it's different...

Whatever happens, my gender identity will never be called into question. There are whole layers of stigma that just won't apply to me, and I recognize that.

[Annces]

25. There are whole layers to be violated and humiliated also

You are putting gender identity above basic body boundaries, which seems related to putting a male's sensibilities higher than a woman's.

Also in some countries, a woman who is raped is blamed for the rape, and is considered damaged goods, and not worth marrying. How about the layers there for keeping a secret.

[NorthernSpy]

30. okay... you know how the stigma applied to promiscuity is harsher for women?

Well, some other stigmas are applied more harshly to men.

You are putting gender identity above basic body boundaries, which seems related to putting a male's sensibilities higher than a woman's.

Stop putting words in my mouth, please.

Also in some countries, a woman who is raped is blamed for the rape, and is considered damaged goods, and not worth marrying. How about the layers there for keeping a secret.

We're talking about this country. This thread is a tangential discussion of a series of rapes that have been occurring in Texas.

[Bluerthanblue]

35. as a fellow woman, and

survivor, all i can say is rape- sodomy- sexual abuse is something you can't put a 'qualifier' on.

My hurt isn't worse than anyone elses- or less than.

I understand where the poster that originally confronted your position is coming from- as a woman, it is somehow ALWAYS 'our fault'- the clothes we wear, the way we walked, the eye-contact- being vunerable- (simply by being alive)- no matter how many times people tell you it isn't something you could have prevented, you feel like you somehow 'asked for it' or 'didn't fight hard enough'.

And yes, sometimes the notion of having died, rather than survived makes fighting back no holds barred to be the only choice-

Rape is violence- visited on others- it is impossible to know what you should have done- or should do- never mind what you - will do when confronted with the situation- we all like to believe we have control- especially in situations where we have little or none- and we'll take the guilt, rather than face the terror of realizing we are so vunerable.

[trumad]

28. Well I kind of think it's mano v mano.

If I felt I could get the jump on him I might do it being that I'm 6:2--230.

Would you?

[bicentennial_baby]

26. Wtf?

How in jeebus' name did you get that from the OP? :wtf:

[brentblack]

34. How??

The post stated 'As a man, would I ALLOW myself to be raped'

This implies that women allow that....not too hard to get that from the opening.


I take extreme exception to any statement that women are weak for getting raped or they 'allow' it.

[trumad]

36. Well then you need to recalibrate your sensitivity meter...

because that clearly not the meaning of my op...and me-thinks you know that but would rather argue for the sake of arguing.

[Sapphire Blue]

5. You would most likely do whatever your gut tells you to do at the time...

... and deal w/your decision from then on.

[raccoon]

6. I think it's impossible for anyone to know how they'd act in such

a situation, male or female.

It's always easy to say, Why didn't the victims fight, or charge and take his (their) guns away? If a person isn't there it's easy to say things like that. It's not a real situation then, you're not paralyzed with fear, and remember, the bad guy(s) have the element of surprise on their side.

Thing is, you don't ever know, until you're faced with something like that, how you'd act in such a situation.

[Scout1071]

7. Man or woman, you wouldn't have any choice.

Dear God, do you think a woman decides to be raped?

That's part of the tragedy of rape....it's taken from you against your will.

[Ron Green]

8. BY gunpoint or AT gunpoint?

ouch.

[Lex]

11. That was a bit confusing, wasn't it?

Either way, it would be bad.

[trumad]

29. Sorry...

at--by... I'm glad you got my drift..LOL

[Ellis Wyatt]

9. yes, you would

because in the moment, a rational person would choose being raped to being murdered.

You think you'll somehow be able to magically overcome your attacker, but you won't.

[JohnnyLib2]

10. Wow, sensitive issue.

It seems to me the post brings up differences in how men and women are taught to think of themselves.

Maybe the ultimate "macho" response would be do get shot/killed first??

And maybe the clearest answer comes from Phoenix; the men are raped.


Much to think about here.

[Mandate My Ass]

12. Nobody allows rape. It is always forceful and unlike B-movie villains

a rapist doesn't make his intentions known while you're standing there facing him allowing you to devise some method to stop him in his tracks.

They used to dismiss victims who weren't beaten to a bloody pulp because they must have "allowed" the rape to occur. This is nothing more than the usual blame the victim bullshit that leaves the stigma of rape on the wronged person rather than the wrongdoer. :puke:

[ayeshahaqqiqa]

13. I really don't know how I would react

but I will say that I feel that any victim of rape who retaliated against the rapist, even if it were after the fact, would have my sympathy and if I were on a jury trying the victim for assault on his/her rapist, I would vote to acquit, as I would think their actions justifiable.

[nadinbrzezinski]

14. As a medic who treated rape victims, both male and

female, I can tell you it is a horrific crime.., regardless

And victims are scarred for life

It is compounded when the medical system does not treat them as victims either and with males it is ten times as bad because the silence and denial is ten times as bad

And no, if this was you, you would not even be asking the question, since the victims never have time to ahem resist.

[sniffa]

17. i'm gLad you gave this its own thread

getcha fLame on

[EstimatedProphet]

19. A gun is a helluva motivator

I haven't been raped, but I have been in situations where things could get ugly in very short order and with no control of the situation by me, and I'll say this: it becomes remarkably easy to not challenge someone being seriously threatening.

[NYCGirl]

20. Does anyone else remember a made for TV movie called "The Rape of Richard

Beck" starring Richard Crenna? Hell of a good script, and Crenna won a well-deserved Emmy. In it, he plays a police detective who thinks that rape victims "asked for it," and when he's raped at gunpoint...well, he changes his mind.

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0089882/

[Gidney N Cloyd]

21. I remeber it. There was also a Hill Street Blues episode where male rape of

one of the detectives was strongly implied.

[Marnieworld]

32. St. Elsewhere

One of the best shows in television history.

They had a Dr. character who was in a prison for some reason, not as an inmate but probably to give medical care. He was raped by several men and it was a storyline for the duration of the series with that character. Flashbacks, nightmares, how it affected his job, his marriage everything.

As far as the OP is concerned, I bet that when anyone is faced with a gun or any other life or death choice, you'd choose what would be the best chance of staying alive. Unless you truly would rather be dead than being raped, I imagine that submission for survival is the choice for anyone after assessing the situation. It's nice to think of yourself as invincible but it implies that there is a choice. The whole point of the violation is to remove your choice. I don't know if I'm making much sense. My point is that that is wishful thinking and gratefully I can only imagine how someone who has been raped would react to it- implying that because they didn't fight harder they somehow failed or agreed to it etc. I imagine it's that kind of thinking that stops many men from getting the help they need.

[sniffa]

23. i remember it very weLL

it's stiLL on sometimes.

[cut.your.crap]

22. Vigilance is the watchword

I spent over 12 years in the trucking industry. There's a few times people wanted to rape me. There are many times people want to rob me. I did my best best to protect yourself.
At an interstate rest area I was beaten up in the rest room. They stole my keys and my truck. They broke my nose and hurt me pretty good. The police found my truck at the next exit ramp. When they checked the truck, they discovered all I was carrying was food. Canned and dry goods. They figure maybe I have cameras or tv's. That time I had about 20 pallets of canned soup, fruits and vegetables and about 10 pallets of cookies and crackers. They just left it. The state police let me and my employer know they found the truck when I was being treated in the hospital. The police weren't too keen on an investigating this crime, as the truck was recovered. I guess I was not all that important. I was actually back on the road trying to make up for lost time within 3 hours.
I thwarted many attempts to hurt me or rob me by getting away fast. You think you'd stand and fight, but you instinctively know to get away. I know truckers that carried a gun or other weapon. You think you'd use it to protect yourself. The truth is it takes a certain mental state to do that. The Army trains people to kill. It doesn't come naturally for most of us.

[bicentennial_baby]

24. As a woman who has taken self-defense,

I've been taught when to pick your battles...If it's a knife, I *may* take my chances, depending on the size of the potential rapist, but if it's a gun, I'm not gonna risk it. My life is more important than a fool's effort.

my .02

[shadowknows69]

27. I've been at gunpoint

luckily this thug only wanted money. I gave it. If he'd came at me with a knife maybe he would have had to earn it, but it still ends up with one of you dead, I carry one now and I intend to sever arteries and tendons if someone tries something again.

[Solon]

31. Let me just say that the likelyhood of males or females facing this particular choice...

is somewhat rare. More likely you will know the perpetrator, and therefore, resistance, if possible, is usually something that you do not really think of at the time. Most victims of rape knew the attacker beforehand, usually as friends, co-workers, or family.

Sometimes such things are rather complicated, its not an easy decision, like a mugging, which, while itself violating, is more along the lines of something that brings about emotions of anger rather than shame. This is the biggest reason why all rapes are much less likely to be reported than most other crimes, excepting, perhaps, domestic violence.

[Xenotime]

33. Just carry a bigger gun..

.45ACP slug to the head would stop the rape pretty quick.

[etherealtruth]

37. No one ALLOWS them-self to be raped

Some choose to do whatever is necessary to survive

[Marie26]

38. WTF? nt

[Fenris]

39. Locking.

This subject can be discussed seriously, but this is not the way to go about it.