Bush's Addiction

[graywarrior]

President Admits Petroleum Addiction, Enters Rehab

One day after claiming that "America is addicted to oil" in
his State of the Union address, President Bush stunned the nation by
confessing that he was personally battling a petroleum addiction and was
entering rehab immediately.

In a nationally televised address from the Oval Office last
night, a visibly agitated President Bush began his speech with the
following simple statement: "My name is George W. Bush, and I am an
oilaholic."

The president, seeming to choke back tears, said that he had
thought he was keeping his petroleum habit "under control," but added,
"When you start invading other countries to get more oil, you know you've
hit bottom."

Mr. Bush's decision to enter rehab for his petroleum addiction
drew applause from many quarters, including from James Frey, author of the
bestselling memoir "A Million Little Pieces."

"He has a rough road ahead of him in rehab," Mr. Frey said. "I
hope that none of the things happen to him that I pretended happened to
me."

In Iran, President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad said that he hoped the
United States would wean itself from its dependence on Middle Eastern oil
and would gradually become dependent on Middle Eastern nuclear energy
instead.

"Iran stands ready and willing to supply the United States
with all of the nuclear energy it wants," President Ahmadinehad said. "We
have so much of this stuff we don't know what to do with it all."

Elsewhere, in a positive development, the nation of
Afghanistan announced that its entire opium harvest had been wiped out by
British rock star Pete Doherty.

[JeffR]

1. k'n'r

:applause: :applause: :applause: :applause:

[NoSunWithoutShadow]

5. I'm clueless; what is the reference to "k 'n' r"?

I've seen it quite a bit on DU and the only thing that comes to mind is Karl Rove. But that doesn't seem right. Please help me, I'm clueless.

:blush:

[JeffR]

6. Kicked and recommended

O8)

[NoSunWithoutShadow]

7. Thank you

Now I really feel stupid, but informed.

:dunce:

[NanceGreggs]

2. Thanks, GreyWarrior!

This is a GREAT read!

[AllegroRondo]

3. Maybe he needs a 12 step program

[graywarrior]

4. Oh, that's cool!