This just in! CBS stocks tank on word that Freepers are forming a boycott

[JohnnyRingo]

A dejected Dave Letterman admits his job may be on the line for this "I don't know what I was thinking". "I should have known better than to take on the likes of 'Buckhead' and his band of righteous conservatives by attacking Bill O'Reilly and the war in Iraq". "This could be the end for me". "I guess I can always go back to doing the weather, as they suggest".

In a related report, CBS begins a backpedal for damage control releasing a statement: "Far left 'bomb throwers' like Letterman will not have a forum here in the future". "We will be exploring the possibility of replacing him and others with more mainstream personalities like Sean Hannity or Pat Buchanen". "Anything to get these viewers from Free Republic back".

After the flood of literally dozens of angry e-mails from angry Freepers, it appears that CBS has come to the realization that they have to appeal to viewers across the political spectrum, and not just the traitors from the "Michael Moore camp". "We now understand that America wants to see inclusive programming aimed at everyone from conservatives to ultra-conservatives" said newly installed program director Ann Coulter. "We have to target the majority of Americans, those who gave George Buxh his mandate in 2004, not just whiny Hollywood liberals".

Many Freepers have switched to NBC's "Late Show with Jay Leno" who they never used to watch either because he's a "left coast commie liberal", and several have expressed willingness to reprogram their remotes to accept channels other than Fox News™ to find out "who's David Letterman" after they write their angry e-mail to cBS president Les Moonves who stated only "We hope it's not too late".


Sorry, no link yet as it was transcribed from a dream a Freeper had after he went to bed last night.

[marmar]

1. LOL...

I was all prepared to get indignant and call CBS.

:hide:

[sasquatch]

2. FReepers couldn't CBS

[Loonman]

3. Jeff Gannon is breaking "dates" as we speak to get on the scene and report

Jim Robinson's only comment was ".....Clinton....blowjob...rosebush...hedgehog...!"

[derby378]

4. "What's a brazillion?"

:silly:

[IndyOp]

5. I hate to admit that you had me going -

I had to skip down to the bottom line before I freaked.

On Edit: I didn't think just the FreeRepub minions would be able to do this, I thought Freepers was being used in a very 'general' sense - to include fundies and others...

:dunce:

[Democrats_win]

6. 60% of what Freepers dream is crap!

The other 40% is capricious.

[cdb]

7. LOL, great post! n/t

[flvegan]

8. CBS' new "Faith Based Comedy Initiative" kicks off next week

I'm sure.

[Cleita]

9. Even if it were true, Letterman is just too big to topple.

:rofl:

[TallahasseeGrannie]

10. Damn! You got me!

[anitar1]

11. Got me too, dang! n/t

[catmandu57]

12. If I were a younger man

I'd stay awake long enough to watch Dave just to piss the idiots off.

[TexasLady]

13. that was brilliant!

thanks for the very loud LOL that spewed out my mouth
:D

[underpants]

14. Well done JohnnyRingo

too funny.