Ladies, You Should Know Better (WSJ/Duke)

[katty]

(now an attack on femin"ism")
excerpt/cont'd: http://www.opinionjournal.com/taste/?id=110008237

Ladies, You Should Know Better
How feminism wages war on common sense.

BY NAOMI SCHAEFER RILEY
Friday, April 14, 2006 12:01 a.m. EDT



If you have attended college any time in the past 20 years, you will have heard that if a woman is forced against her will to have sex, it is "not her fault" and that women always have the right to "control their own bodies." Nothing could be truer. But the administrators who utter these sentiments and the feminists who inspire them rarely note which situations are conducive to keeping that control and which threaten it. They rarely discuss what to do to reduce the likelihood of a rape. Short of re-educating men, that is.
But just as sociopaths exist on the Lower East Side, they exist on college campuses. One or two might even be playing lacrosse for Duke University. The past few weeks have brought much hand-wringing about the alleged rape of a stripper at a team party in Durham, N.C. Understandably so: An email from one team member, just after the party, suggested that he was aroused by the idea of skinning a woman and killing her. Though the investigation is still under way, commentators have already blamed the event on everything from racism (the stripper was black, the accused players white) to the lack of moral instruction in colleges today.

Which explanation is most credible? Perhaps it doesn't matter. Whatever the problem is, it won't be fixed this year or possibly ever, even with best sorts of attitude adjustment. Perhaps the law of averages says that, with 14 million men in U.S. colleges today, a few of them will be rapists. What to do? For starters: Be wary of drunken house parties.

Now, readers may well assume that this advice is obvious and that no Duke coed would ever do what the stripper, by her own account, did: Upon finding 40 men at the party instead of the four for whom she agreed to "dance," she stayed and performed anyway. When the partygoers began shouting what she described as racial epithets and violent threats, she left but returned after an apology from a team member. A stripper with street smarts is apparently a Hollywood myth.

[Bonobo]

1. What an elegant way of saying "she deserved it"!

[TahitiNut]

29. Not necessarily.

First and foremost, A VICTIM IS NOT TO BE BLAMED FOR ANOTHER'S ACTS! Let's try to hold onto that, OK?

Now, let's imagine a conversation between friends ... the kind of conversation I've had and, I'd guess, most of us have had.

Person A - "I'm losing it! I can't handle this again! Why does this happen to me?"
Person B - "Well, you could be more careful in your choice of friends and lovers."
Person A - "Are you saying it's MY FAULT?!?!!?!"
Person B - "No. I'm trying to tell you what you do that increases the chance this will happen. After all, isn't that what you asked?"
Person A - "I thought you were my friend! Why does this always happen to me!??"
Rinse. Repeat.

It is a tragic reality that we live in a world with predators. Just as the predators are responsible for their acts, so are we. There are things we can (not must, but can) do to avoid predators. It's a choice. Sometimes, it's a difficult choice. Sometimes, it's not a reasonable choice.

[Notoverit]

2. And the reason we need this RW tripe on DU is?

[Richard Steele]

5. The first rule of war is "know your enemy". nm

[omega minimo]

14. That "enemy" must learn the first rule of life: "Know Thyself"

:think:

[EFerrari]

15. I agree. Yes. it's nauseating but we need to learn how

these sick bastards think and operate.

[cynatnite]

3. Did she just blame feminism for women getting raped?

Am I reading this right? :wow:

[EFerrari]

13. You bet! n/t

[KamaAina]

4. She is not a "stripper"

A stripper with street smarts is apparently a Hollywood myth.

A Wall Street Journal writer with journalistic integrity is apparently also a Hollywood myth. The accuser in the case is not a "stripper" but was working as an exotic dancer in order to pay her way through N.C. Central University in Durham. More women than you might guess choose this path. So, in the final analysis, we have the Bush** financial aid cuts to blame for this mess.

[lolly]

6. Contradictions "R" Us

After years of telling us that feminists were just bitter because they were too ugly/strident/unfeminine to attract mates, now they tell us feminists are responsible for women working as exotic dancers? But, but, I thought feminists hated sex and hated being sexually attractive to men?

I'm s-o-o-o-o confused.

[Cone10]

7. Stripper

What you faild to say is the so called stripper was a college student trying to earn money to finish her education. Whether she danced naked in from of forty college students and whether she was drunk or sober should not matter. No means no and rape is not about sex but power. Did these boys do it. I don't know. The LaCrosse players should have had enough intelligence since they go to Duke not to put themselves in a position like this. The truth will come out in the end.

[Catherine Vincent]

8. From the Wall Street Journal ....

That figures!

[Cerridwen]

9. The next generation of neo-cons

"Ladies," I hope you're prepared.

Naomi Schaefer Riley is (was, she left for job at WSJ) an adjunct fellow at the Ethics and Public Policy Center

The Ethics and Public Policy Center was established in 1976 to clarify and reinforce the bond between the Judeo-Christian moral tradition and the public debate over domestic and foreign policy issues.

She's a Phyllis Schlafly wannabe/gonnabe.

[omega minimo]

12. She lost me@: "...weeks brought much hand-wringing about the alleged rape"

"The past few weeks have brought much hand-wringing about the alleged rape" :evilfrown:

Phony baloney :puke:

[Cerridwen]

16. She speaks with all the authority

of a woman who's never known a day of hardship in her life. Has never paced the floor at 2:00am wondering how to pay the rent or the power bill. Has never wondered if she's pregnant and if so, "now what the fuck do I do?" Has watched her friends around her suffer and wondered "why don't they just get over themselves and fix it?" Has no understanding of why we all can't just "take it like a man."

There is no depth to her or her words. She has not lived her life but only existed and done what's expected of her. I doubt she's had an original thought in her life.

Based on her picture, she's in her late 20s. Heaven help her should she ever encounter real life.

Just felt like editorializing a bit.



:evilgrin:

[omega minimo]

22. She grew up in a bizarre post-Madonna, post-Paglia fishbowl...

.......... that's tougher than she can know. :crazy:

[miss_american_pie]

10. "Short of re-educating men, that is."

So who is she insulting here, men or feminists? Or does she just hate everyone?

I have sons. I'm certain they're capable of understanding "no."

[alarimer]

27. Most do get it already I think

it's those few cretins left that still need "re-educating". Those who believe strippers can't be raped for example or that what a woman wears means "she was asking for it" etc.

[EFerrari]

11. What a crock. I hope this "journalist" got a good enough bribe.

"They rarely discuss what to do to reduce the likelihood of a rape."

I have to run -- to my weekly "reduce the likelihood of rape" group. :sarcasm:

[kevinbgoode]

17. I'm sure a pair of Bobbitt shears will reduce the likelihood

quite handily. Perhaps someone should ask Naomi why she didn't recommend exotic dancers carry a pair on every job assignment?

[EFerrari]

18. Right. Because working girls need to be prepared.

Geeze, what a terrible stain on our culture. :(

[Solly Mack]

19. It's the "boys will be boys" mentality - among other bullshit

The thinking goes - It's not the criminal/boorish/sexist behavior of the men that's at fault - it's that women, knowing "boys will be boys", should know better. Men can't help themselves, so women have to act and be a certain way so men won't rape/harass/beat/bully them. It's the warped, demented thinking that women are, somehow, responsible for the behavior of men.

How pathetic is that?(Very) How weak minded is that?(Beyond the pale) How sad is that?(Incredibly)

You'd think all men would be offended by such thinking, yet some embrace it. I can only think of one reason why a man would embrace that thinking - and it ain't a pretty thought.

The other idea is that somehow something viewed by others as a bad judgment call is an excuse for getting raped. So if you make a bad decision in the eyes of others, you deserve what you get.
exampled by:

If you go to a party and are raped?It's your fault because - "why did you go to that party?"
If you get drunk and are raped? It's your fault because - "why did you drink?"
If you wear a short skirt and are raped? It's your fault because -"why did you wear that skirt?"
If you go on a date and are raped? It's your fault because - "why did you go out with him?"
If you go to the store at night and are raped?It's your fault -"why did you go out at night?"

Folks that spout that shit might as well come clean and say what they're really thinking -
If you're a woman and you get raped - it's your fault for being a woman. The true crime in the mind of those who embrace this thinking is: that being born a woman is a crime. They can excuse the actions of the rapist because gee- "boys will be boys and men just can't help themselves - and women should know better"

Or the equally sick and demented - "the victim shares in the responsibility of the rape"

How fucked up is that?

It's saying it's the victim's fault the rapist is a rapist.

A rapist won't rape unless provoked? You have to be truly stupid - or a rapist - to embrace that thinking.

I know some women live in deep denial and play the "bad things don't happen to good girls" game - and those women are truly in need of a spine and some oxygen to the brain. They've bought into the paternalistic bullshit that men don't hurt good girls, so maintain the role of "good girl" that the patriarchal paradigm has established and men will not hurt you - but if you step out of the role that a patriarchal society has dictated for women, then you're a bad girl and bad things happen to bad girls. It's just another way to try and control women.

Be what we say is a good girl or else!

Well, fuck that and fuck people who think that way.

[FredScuttle]

20. We knew this was coming

Gee, what a shock...the WSJ blames feminism and the dancer herself for getting gang-raped. I wouldn't wipe my ass with the WSJ if it was the last paper in the house.

[ismnotwasm]

21. Ugly

Even uglier:
http://www.cdc.gov/ncipc/factsheets/svfacts.htm
excerpt:Available data greatly underestimate the true magnitude of the problem. Rape is one of the most underreported crimes. In 2002, only 39% of rapes and sexual assaults were reported to law enforcement officials (DOJ 2003). While not an exhaustive list, here are some statistics on the occurrence of sexual violence
-snip-

Most perpetrators of sexual violence are men. Among acts of SV committed against women since the age of 18, 100% of rapes, 92% of physical assaults, and 97% of stalking acts were perpetrated by men. SV against men is also mainly male violence: 70% of rapes, 86% of physical assaults, and 65% of stalking acts were perpetrated by men (Tjaden and Thoennes 2000).
-snip-

Vulnerability Factors for Victimization

Prior history of sexual violence. Women who are raped before the age of 18 are twice as likely to be raped as adults, compared to those without a history of sexual abuse (Tjaden and Thoennes 2000).
Gender. Women are more likely to be victims of sexual violence than men: 78% of the victims of rape and sexual assault are women and 22% are men (Tjaden and Thoennes 2000). These findings may be influenced by the reluctance of men to report sexual violence.
Young age. Sexual violence victimization starts very early in life. More than half of all rapes of women (54%) occur before age 18; 22% of these rapes occur before age 12. For men, 75% of all rapes occur before age 18, and 48% occur before age 12 (Tjaden and Thoennes 2000). Young women are at higher risk of being raped than older women (Acierno et al. 1999).
Drug or alcohol use.* Binge drinking and drug use are related to increased rates of victimization (Champion et al. 2004).
High-risk sexual behavior. As with drug/alcohol use, researchers are trying to understand the complex relationships between sexuality and sexual violence — their causality, directionality, and other etiologic factors that increase vulnerability for victimization are not well understood. Some researchers believe that engaging in high-risk sexual behavior is both a vulnerability factor and a consequence of childhood sexual abuse. Youth with many sexual partners are at increased risk of experiencing sexual abuse (Howard and Wang 2003; Valois et al. 1999).
Poverty.* Poverty may make the daily lives of women and children more dangerous (e.g. walking alone at night, less parental supervision). It may also make them more dependent on men for survival and therefore less able to control their own sexuality, consent to sex, recognize their own victimization or to seek help when victimized. These issues increase their vulnerability to sexual victimization (Jewkes, Sen, and Garcia-Moreno 2002). In addition, poor women may be at risk for sexual violence because their economic (and, often, educational) status necessitates that they engage in high-risk survival activities, for example trading sex for food, money, or other items (Wenzel et al. 2004). Poverty also puts women at increased risk of intimate partner violence, of which sexual violence is often one aspect.
Ethnicity/culture. American Indian and Alaskan Native women are more likely (34%) to report being raped than African American women (19%), White women (18%) or Hispanic women (15%) (Tjaden and Thoennes 2000).

[Berry Cool]

23. You know, it's funny.

If some very trusting people left their doors unlocked and then had their house picked clean by burglars, we wouldn't blame them for the burglary. We'd say yeah, the burglars chose a house they could get into, but the act of burglary is still the fault of the burglars, not the fault of the people who left their house unlocked. After all, no one forced the burglars into the burglary.

If a man from a small town goes to a big city, he gets warned not to just stick his wallet in his back pocket, where pickpockets can get at it easily. But if he does, and they do, do we blame him? Do we act as if he deserved to lose his wallet? No. The theft of the wallet is still considered a crime. We don't tell him he was "asking for it" because he didn't put his wallet in a safer place.

So why is it that if a woman is raped, that we cannot simply acknowledge that a crime has taken place? Whether or not she behaved in some sort of streetwise savvy way to avoid being a victim of a crime, she is a victim of a crime. Nothing else really matters--not what kind of clothes she was wearing, not what kind of job she has, not whether she was drunk, not whether she was at a wild party, not whether she was walking in a dark place at a late hour.

Don't most of us think very little of the kind of scum who would roll a drunk in the street and take his wallet? Well, until we start thinking of women the same way--and realize that it's even WORSE to take advantage of them in situations where they're incapable of rendering sound judgment--we won't have advanced as a civilization.

[katty]

28. agree-exactly!

[AnnieBW]

24. Sense of Entitlement

I was talking with an older gentleman of my acquaintance the other day about this. To be fair, he's a lifelong Maryland Terrapins supporter, and hates Duke with the same passion that a Red Sox fan hates the Yankees. But, he made a very wise comment about the athletes at Duke - no matter if they're the men's basketball, women's basketball, or men's lacrosse teams. They all have a sense of entitlement, that they DESERVE to be champions because they're from Duke. It's the same thing with this. This black girl from a state school is putting herself through college by being a stripper. She doesn't have a scholarship. She's not an athlete. She's got a nice body, and she's making better money wearing pasties and a G-string than she would wearing a Wal-Mart smock. These drunken, horny white jocks feel that they're ENTITLED to have their way with her. She's nothing, just a "whore", and a "n****r whore" at that. They know that they'll get away with it, because hey, they're National Champions. They're bringing a lot of exposure and money to the school.

As the late, great Baltimore newsman R. Edward Lopez would say, "sports builds character." :sarcasm:

[EFerrari]

25. Bingo. A sense of entitlement. And it doesn't help to have

this belief and behavior constantly modeled by the pResident. He's the poster boy and who knows how many sociopaths he's enabling.

[bumblebee1]

26. These lacrosse players are bringing exposure to Duke.

However, it's the wrong kind of exposure.

[politicat]

30. When the WSJ gives out jobs to poor, black women that allow them to

make the rent with three hours' of work, I'll listen to the WSJ on what women should and should not do with their bodies and how careful we should be.

I may not be a fan of the sex industry because it profits off of women who can't get another job that lets them both be members of their family and support their families, but I support the women 110%. When this country realizes that the sex industry is economically driven, and is driven primarily by women with enough education to realize that they want a better life, but not enough to get it without having more money; that the women who work in the industry are doing so not necessarily for a love of exhibitionism, but because it is the only job where a woman without 20 years in their field and a PhD can work 15-20 hours a week and be economically secure... then the WSJ can give me pointers about where to go and what to do.

Until then, I really think the victim should be suing for workmans' compensation for her injuries and mental trauma. If her employer had provided her with the basic protections that her job required - a body guard, to start with - she'd have been less likely to be harmed. (And yes, I know that outcall dancing is usually a contractor position rather than an employed position. I see this as a problem and yet another example of the sex industry harming women by refusing to be responsible employers.)

[novalib]

31. Unbelievable!

Just unbelievable!

It's like saying that if I walk at night and get stabbed, I am the guilty one -- instead of the person who stabbed me!