RNC hires voodoo witch doctor to try and reanimate corpse of Ronald Reagan

[ck4829]

Comments one anonymous official: "We don't have any real candidates, but we think the twenty second amendment doesn't apply to zombies who served two terms in their previous lives." He continued, "Better not tell the religious right about this, or they'll flip, but then again, they haven't even noticed our sacrifices made to Mammon with the blood of Iraqi children, so they might not even notice."

[BrklynLiberal]

1. If there was a chance in a million, I am sure they would try it.

[JohnnyLib2]

2. Don't laugh, it is working!

Just heard from a relative in California -- The Gipper was spotted riding his horse in the hills above Santa Monica. Doomed, we're doooooomed.

[Mark 2000]

3. Reagan was dead the last 3 years of his presidency anyway

And no one noticed then. Actually, the way the presidential royalty has been Im sure one of his sons could run and people would eat it up. Theirs nothing like a good dynasty.

[jgraz]

4. Who needs a witch doctor?

They way they treat ol' Ronnie, you'd think he'd just walk out of his tomb on the third day.

[Arkana]

5. Hellooooo new Onion article

[BleedingHeartPatriot]

6. Ah, the halcyon Reagan years. Good times.

The guy talked a good game, although he didn't write a word of it.

He union busted with a smile on his face and laughingly put into place "trickle down economics".

Yep, whatta guy. And, he was a zombie the first go round, so he's got "presidenting as a zombie" down pat. MKJ