Morgan Freeman for President!!!

[krispos42]

I'm watching "Deep Impact" and how Morgan Freeman is portraying the President during a massive and ongoing crisis (cometary impact) and I keep thinking...

If BushCo was in charge, he would have just sat there, drooling, for a couple of weeks. The spaceship never would have been built in time, the Ark Cave in Missouri would never have been built, there would have been massive panic-buying and profiteering, riots all over the place as the populace drew absolutely zero strengh and conviction from him, and he would keep saying they had a secret plan, that the destruction of the comet was right around the corner, that the nex six weeks were critical, and you don't change horses in mid-stream, right up to the moment a half-trillion tons of ice moving at Mach 40 punches through the Earth's crust.

Thoughts?

[The Straight Story]

1. Bush would create a war on comets and spend a ton of our money paying his buddies

to build prisons to interrogate people about the comet.

Then he would look up at the sky and say 'bring it on', followed by a prayer group in the west wing to try and deflect it with prayer.

And we would all be on DU bitching about it when the thing hit, though the posts would be lost in a sea of 'look how big Edwards' house is' and 'Paris Hilton should stay in jail when it hits' :)

[krispos42]

2. No, he would invade Mars

A haven for rogue comets, and all that :P

[bluerum]

6. That about sums it up. eom

[DFW]

3. If the right wing nominates Thompson

We might as well nominate Morgan Freeman.

Then we'll become the country of actors that so many
around the world think we are already!

Besides, Morgan Freeman has a much better speaking voice,
and he already knows how to play God (Bruce Almighty).

[Dogmudgeon]

4. Coulter, Limbaugh, and O'Reilly ...

... would proclaim that Jenny Lerner was "shrill" and subtly imply that her relationship with the President was sexual.

The funding appropriation for the Messiah mission to stop Comet Wolf-Biederman would have a rider stipulating that no federal funds be used for abortion.

They would also demand a Congressional investigation into this mysterious femme fatale named Ellie.

There would be calls from the Religious Right to fund Faith Based cometary diversion "Prayer Warriors", and PETA would demand that the survival lottery be extended to animals.

There would be a Comet Wolf-Biederman Skepticism movement, and Penn Jillette would proclaim it to be "Bullshit!" Alexander Cockburn would also denounce the effort as a liberal plot to destroy true leftism, Christopher Hitchens would call the President a "hell hound", and David Ickes would announce that Comet Wolf-Biederman was part of the Jewish conspiracy to institute a one-world government.

The entire mess would then be blamed on Bill Clinton.

Finally, under pressure from Nancy Grace and Chris Hansen, Leo and Sarah would both be prosecuted for statutory rape, and each would be sentenced to 10 years in prison.

--p!

[krispos42]

5. Yeah, that sounds about right

I forgot to blame Clinton for the mess. How foolish of me!