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JeffR
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Fri Jul-27-07 04:42 PM Original message |
| ***DUzy Awards for week ending July 27, 2007.*** |
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Edited on Sat Jul-28-07 04:31 PM by proud patriot
edited to remove a pa rather than remove the whole thread
proud patriot Moderator Democratic Underground  Welcome to the DUzy Awards, honoring alluring alacrity, anarchic animadversion, and acrobatic absurdity from this week on DU. Congratulations to this week's winners!The diaperless DUzies will be announced every Friday, if I get around to it. Previous awards can be found in my journal. Note to Mods: Skinner has authorized the DUzy Awards to be posted in GD. OP by Botany: People who still support bush are like: Somebody who watches re-runs of "Walker Texas Ranger," all the time and are still surprised when Chuck Norris does a "roundhouse kick" to the bad guy's head. I don't know why I just thought of Chuck Norris but sometimes my dendrites tend to fire in strange ways. :rofl: response #2 by Patsy Stone: The same ones who think that this time, the castaways will finally make it off the island. response #5 by Idealist Hippie: No one could have foreseen that Chuck would perform a roundhouse kick at that time..... response #20 by LanternWaste: Bush supporters are like... Bush supporters are like: People who deny evolution... and would go to the edges of the earth to prove it. response #21 by tjwash: They are like people who would eat tuna fish flavored tic tacs and like them... ...because the nice man on the TV told that they were delicious. response #22 by Ghost in the Machine : People who still support Bush are just like a slinky - They serve no useful purpose, but it's still fun to watch them tumble down a flight of stairs... OP by panader0: Why can't I have a colonoscopy too? Oh yeah, no money. bush gets his on the taxpayer dollar. Me, I gotta use a flashlight and a mirror. response #1 by KAZ: You'll be in a better position for the procedure... ..if you pull yourself up by your bootstraps. At least in my mind's eye. :) On a thread by AZBlue: New Forum Suggestion: Conspiracy Theories So that all the people who really think that we're going to be under martial law here or that there will be no election in 2008 or that the GOP is planning a fake terrorist attack on US soil can all congregate there! That way conspiracy theories won't hijack threads anymore. If you like the idea, recommend or kick. If you want to share a conspiracy theory with me, be forewarned that I will completely ignore it... response #18 by me b zola: New forum idea: Tighty-whities in a bunch On a thread by bob_weaver: The star-studded lineup for Hannity's "Freedom Concert" response #27 by impeachdubya: I'll Take "Has-Beens, Never-Weres, And People That Suck" for 500, Alex! nt response #31 by bob_weaver: In the tradition of "The Three Tenors" they should call this "The Nine Ugly White Men" response #35 by SalmonChantedEvening: Tickets are SOLD OUT! All both of them! :D response #37 by lonestarnot: Where are they holding this thing? I thought we had done away with phone booths. :shrug: response #46 by alfredo: Four musicians and five propagandists. Yep, should be fun. response #49 by lpbk2713: Look up *one trick pony* and you'll find a pic of Lee Greenwood. Has he ever done anything else besides that flag waver song? :shrug: response #52 by bob_weaver: They are promising that he's going to do a medley of his hit On a thread by bluethruandthru: Why is Bush having his Colonoscopy at Camp David? response #1 by messiah2012: That's where they keep the really large drill bits. response #4 by babylonsister: He's secretive. Heh-heh. And maybe was confused about a Colin being involved. response #6 by Bluebear: They're telling him he's going to the circus. nt On a thread by frogcycle: When Al Gore enters the race... response #6 by lvx35: Still waiting for Gorot, eh? nt OP by Lil Missy: Breaking - Diagnosis on Bush surgery He's an asshole. OP by In_Transit: Well, ol' Georgie had a colonoscopy today and they found seven polyps, forty-two senators, including Joe Lieberman, and one hundred and twenty six congressmen. A spokesperson for the hospital said that the polyps were successfully removed but the political trash was inoperable. Just sayin'. OP by edwardsguy: Ever wonder how Cheney survived multiple heart attacks? Because Satan does not want a coup in hell... :hide: OP by Botany: Breaking: CBS to replace Katie Couric w/ Stephanie Miller A.P. 7/21/2007 New York, New York CBS News President Sean McManus, announced today that after September 15, 2007 that Katie Couric will make a lateral move in the CBS News Department and will no longer anchor the evening news. In breaking with tradition McManus is expected to make Stephanie Miller, (age 57) of Hollywood Hills, California the new anchor for the nightly news. After seeing her on MSNBC McManus thought she would be perfect for lifting the CBS Evening News out of last place in the ratings. "Nobody sweats the details like Ms. Miller and she seems to have her finger on the pulse of what America is thinking." McManus also thinks that hiring Ms. Miller will help the bottom line of the news departments budget because she is willing to work for $36,000 a year, pet supplies, a condo on Long Island, and boxed wine. Ms. Couric reportedly slapped her personal assistant when told of her change in job status. "Don't they know who the hell I am? ..... I am the fuckingist perky little news anchor in the world and I will not put up with this shit. By the way do you want an autographed picture of me?" Ms. Couric was reported to have said to a reporter from T.V. guide when asked for her reaction. Stephanie Miller could not be reached for comment. Sean McManus' father, Jim McKay, will do the introduction to the broadcast of the nightly news. Spanning the globe to bring you the constant variety of news… the thrill of victory… and the agony of defeat… the human drama of media competition… this is The Stephanie Miller News Show! On a thread by conspirator: The monetary system is the biggest scam in the history of mankind response #16 by Raskolnik: Bigger than One Hour Martinizing? Holy crap! On a thread by Omaha Steve: McCain Says He's Happy With Campaign "URBANDALE, Iowa (AP) - John McCain on Sunday assured Iowa supporters that he's doing fine and intends to seriously compete in the state's leadoff caucuses despite staff cuts and money problems..." response #1 by Lastlaughin08: Atta boy, John. So is the rest of America happy with it. G O I N G D O W N F A S T . . . . response #6 by NanceGreggs: McCain said he met with backers to let them know ... ... his campaign is strong. He also assured them that the Sun revolves around a flat earth, construction of DisneyWorld Baghdad is complete and already filled with joyous customers, and every US citizen will get a million dollar check in the mail as soon as he's in office ... ... oh, and he also swore to stamp out gay sweaters in our lifetime, a statement that was met by a standing ovation from his supporters (all three of them). As Dan Quayle once said, "A mind truly IS a terrible thing to lose." response #8 by rocknation: Your staffers weren't cut, John they cut and ran... :evilgrin: OP by Faux pas: Five polyps "WASHINGTON (Reuters) - President George W. Bush had five polyps removed during a routine colon cancer test on Saturday, but his doctors described them as small and apparently not worrisome, the White House said..." ********* Doctors also report finding the following items during the routine procedure: 1. The missing WMDs 2. Senator Joe Lieberman (I-CT) 3. A bootlegged copy of Hooked on Phonics 4. Harriet Miers curriculum vitae 5. A pair of Presidential Seal bicycle socks response #7 by walldude: The Five Polyps? Weren't they an R&B group? n/t On a thread by kpete: Bush Hits 25% Approval (ARG) response #5 by panader0: bush is so low he could play handball against a curb. n/t response #21 by flying rabbit: Bush is so low he needs a ladder to pick up a dime. On a thread by G_j: Bush Approval Rating Down to 25% response #2 by jobycom: Damn. That's the largest majority I've ever been a part of. I'm scared. On a thread by sabra: Gonzales to Senate: I'm Staying "Attorney General Alberto Gonzales says he's staying at the Justice Department to try to repair its broken image, telling Congress in a statement released Monday he's troubled that politics may have played a part in hiring career federal prosecutors..." response #1 by annabanana: Yup.. The henhouse needs guardin' sumpin' bad... best we leave the fox in charge, after all, he's got the experience. yup response #5 by Dr.Phool: Mission Implausible. OP by TahitiNut: Did Georgie and Dickie fail Kindergarten??
On a thread by IanDB1: Above the Law: Billionaires in the Bedroom. Mogul Reportedly Built $30 Million Sex Grotto "The latest in a long line of lurid Lotharios is said to be computer chip mogul Henry T. Nicholas III, who allegedly built a $30 million underground grotto, complete with hidden doors and secret levers, at his equestrian estate in Laguna Hills, Calif. According to court documents unearthed by the Los Angeles Times, Nicholas is said to have planned a 'secret and convenient lair' where he could indulge his 'manic obsession with prostitutes' and 'addiction to cocaine and Ecstasy.' The 47-year-old billionaire, who co-founded Broadcom Corp in 1991, had his private jet ferry prostitutes from New Orleans, Chicago and Las Vegas to his lair, nicknamed the Pond, where he provided his rock-star guests with drugs, including mushrooms and nitrous oxide, according to the draft complaint. In addition, the complaint dug up by the Times alleges that Nicholas used the lair as his "personal brothel" until his wife caught him in the act with a prostitute, according to the paper. His wife, Stacy Nicholas, has since filed for divorce..." response #1 by Lerkfish: not for nothin, but his wife didn't know something was up until then? He built a $30 million dollar S&M grotto, and she don't know about it? wow. I can't even get up to the use the bathroom in the middle of the night without my wife asking if I'm ok. OP by krispos42: Three posts that should not be next to each other I love cocks "Tastes like chicken" I have decided I would like a Designer Vagina Just saw them adjecent to each other, in that order. Laughed my ass off at the thought of a woman picking through a catalogue of vaginas while sprinkling powdered chicken broth on her SO's penis. That is all... On a thread by SoCalDem: Dress code for next "debate"? Swimsuits? evening gowns? Geez louise.. who cares what they wore.. response #2 by bluestateguy: I do NOT want to see Mike Gravel in a swimsuit! response #3 by SoCalDem: Imagine Brownback in a speedo :) or Duncan Hunter :rofl: response #6 by scarletwoman: Hey! That's a FABULOUS idea! A swimsuit competition! An evening gown competition! Top it off with a talent competition (baton twirling, tap dancing, etc.) and the interview portion ("How I will end world hunger"); add some snazzy staging and a tuxedo-clad MC -- it'll be a "debate" NO ONE will want to miss! "Live! From Atlantic City! The Leader of the Free World(tm) pageant!" :D OP by sniffa: Lindsay Lohan is our mandeLa she's in jaiL right? keep up the good fight Lindsay. we'LL burn a candLe for you. response #1 by Rabrrrrrr: . Solidarność! On a thread by rodeodance: Gonzales denies pressuring Ashcroft response #5 by EVDebs: "Hey Andy, let's yank out that IV in his arm and see if that'll change his mind" On a thread by w8liftinglady: Question-does being drunk disqualify posting on DU /general? response #7 by Der Blaue Engel: Wait...people post sober?? This changes my entire concept of DU. response #10 by tularetom: I sure as hell hope not! I'd really miss this place. On a poll by mcscajun: Most annoying Food Network program? response #3 by Saint Etienne17: Sandra Lee's show or that TERRIBLE show w/ that Michael Chiarello, 'Easy Entertaining' he's as uncharasmatic as his food, and I think he gives Bobby Flay a run for his money in the boring department Sandra Lee isn't boring at all, but instead some of her food reminds me of what an unskilled pothead would cook to satiate some bad late-night munchies response #6 by displacedtexan: Even Comcast lists Semi-Homemade as "..." here. It's like it's "The show whose name can not be said." response #13 by youthere: Oh it's GOT to be Sandra Lee.... But to be fair, what she does can hardly be labeled as "cooking". I'd like to make my own tablescape..out of her lifeless body. response #19 by Phentex: It's her voice and the way she drags out her words constantly. "Today we're going to make a cupcake look jjjjjjust like a leg of lamb." Once I noticed she prrrrrrronounced her words that way, I couldn't watch. On a thread by rodeodance: Religion and sex life among passenger details to be passed on to officials "Highly sensitive information about the religious beliefs, political opinions and even the sex life of Britons travelling to the United States is to be made available to US authorities when the European Commission agrees to a new system of checking passengers..." response #4 by xultar: Here's my application: Name: Xultar Sex: Frequently freaky Religion: Anti-Bush Occupation: Politically persecuted Black Woman Spouse: Vin Diesel Why are you traveling: To get the fuck out of this jacked up country. Political affiliation: ANTI REPUBLICAN Signed: kiss my black ass. OP by Poiuyt: George Bush is a saint! President George W. Bush was scheduled to visit the Episcopal Church in NW Washington as part of his campaign to restore his 28% approval rating in the polls. Karl Rove made a visit to the Bishop and said, "We've been getting a lot of bad publicity because of the President's position on stem cell research, the Iraq war, Hurricane Katrina, and the VA Hospitals. But, we'll make a $500,000 contribution to your church if during your sermon you will say that the President is a saint. The Bishop thought it over for a few moments and finally said, The Church could really use the money - I'll do it." The following Sunday, President Bush showed up for the sermon, and the Bishop began: "I'd like to speak to all of you this morning about our President, George Bush. He is a liar, a cheat, and a low-intelligence weasel. He took the tragedy of September 11 and used it to frighten and manipulate the American people. He lied about weapons of mass destruction and invaded Iraq for oil and money, causing the deaths of tens of thousands and making the United States the most hated nation on earth. "He appointed cronies to positions of power and influence, leading to widespread death and destruction during Hurricane Katrina. He awarded contracts and tax cuts to his rich friends so that we now have more poverty in this country and a greater gap between rich and poor than we've had since the Depression. "He has headed the most corrupt, bribe-inducing political party since Teapot Dome Scandal. "The national surplus has turned into a staggering national debt of 7.6 trillion Dollars, gas prices are up 85%, which the people of America cannot afford, and vital research into global warming and stem cells is stopped cold because he's afraid to lose votes from the religious right. "He is the worst example of a true Christian I've ever known. But compared to Dick Cheney, George W. Bush is a saint." OP by datasuspect: Bloviating Pontifical Assertion chest thumping pseudo-profound body text. response #5 by deepthought42: Sarcastic, somewhat witty remark followed by :eyes: and :sarcasm: response #18 by bertha katzenengel: pathetic whine retract your uncalled-for sarcasm response #19 by deepthought42: calling out whining making comments about person who replied based on their post and my own shortcomings. Followed by :eyes: yet again. response #7 by Tyler Durden: I've always liked it. Short, loud, insane...beats any press conference for a president I've ever seen that wasn't on a 1940's newsreel. response #12 by FloridaJudy: Off-topic post about Harry Potter n/t OP by Writer: A kind thanks to all Internet posters.* Hello. I'd like to extend my thanks to all of you hard working posters. For your keen insight into the details. For your ability to read the subtext - even if the subtext isn't there! For your colorful perspectives and your innovative methods of exploring important issues with one another. For your push for party brotherhood even if, sometimes, it may take a bit of family therapy. For your sweet humor, baked into a loaf of carrot cake, covered with nuts then dipped into a bucket of Valvoline. For your consistent pursuit for the media to cover the real stories, while still recognizing en masse fun topics like Anna Nicole Smith. For your patience for one another. For your kindness and acceptance of difference. And for making sure everyone follows along in lock-step. For your being consistently duplicitous, logically emotive, and pursuant of many convenient forms of truth. YOU are the brave souls ready to speak out... online. I salute YOU. :patriot: *All previous statements subject to possible irony, only for the joy of self-deprecating humor, and not intended to out any particular poster or cause general mayhem. Poster loves everyone on DU. :hug: On a thread by northernsoul: I propose a moratorium on comparing onseself to Rosa Parks response #1 by bryant69: Can I compare myself to Abraham Lincoln? no wait - how about Emperor Xerxes, immortalized in Frank Miller's 300? Or 80's balladeer Huey Lewis? response #3 by bigtree: but, but, we have the same eyes response #7 by Enrique: that's like asking me to sit in the back of the bus :-) On a thread by Mayberry Machiavelli: Do Republican candidates even have ANY health care proposals beyond status quo? response #12 by tandot: Yes: Don't get sick On a thread by Bluebear: Warning!!!!1 Blocks of cheese connected to wires! "SAN DIEGO -- Lindbergh Field is among four airports named in an intelligence bulletin that warns terrorists may be planning future attacks in the United States... ... the TSA said blocks of processed cheese were connected to wires and an electrical switch, or the cheese was taped to a bag holding a cell-phone charger... While the people found carrying the items were not linked to terrorist organizations, the TSA said, 'most passengers' explanations for carrying the suspicious items were questionable, and some investigations are still ongoing.'" response #1 by lwfern: I blame the Swiss. (nt) response #3 by murielm99: Those damned Cheeseheads. A bunch of them must have gotten drunk at a Brewers game and done this. response #5 by orleans: crap! another food recall. n/t response #6 by zehnkatzen: Looks like the gnomes of Zürich... ...are getting kind of restless. BTW, you didn't hear about the gnomes of Zürich from me. But now, I'm thinkin', mmmm...cheese. Damn that Bush Administration–they sabotage everything, including my diet! response #17 by radfringe: MAN ARRESTED FOR SAYING "CHEESE!" A man was arrested yesterday for saying cheese. He was seeing his family off for vacation and wanted to take a photograph of them standing around their luggage. He shouted "SAY CHEESE" to his family and snapped a picture just before he was tackled by security agents. response #20 by HeeBGBz: It's gouda they caught it in time n/t response #22 by Tesha: Jokes like that just leave me feeling bleu. In fact, after a few of them, I get really cheesed off! I become a real muenster! I curd just scream! response #23 by HeeBGBz: The Provolone Gunman Theory I heard Monterey Jack was in town. GD, July 25, 2007: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=389x1429109 On a thread by spanone: CNN: Terrorists going to blow up planes with Cheese response #22 by SoCalDem: "Don't fly your cheese to town, son.. "Don't Fly Your Cheese To Town" A young cowboy named Billy Joe grew restless on the farm A boy filled with wonderlust who really meant no harm He changed his clothes and shined his boots And combed his dark hair down And his mother cried as he walked out Don't fly your cheese to town son Leave your cheese at home Bill Don't fly your cheese to town He laughed and kissed his mom And said your Billy Joe's a man I can shred as quick and straight as anybody can But I wouldn't shred without a cause I'd melt nobody down But she cried again as he rode away Don't fly your cheese to town son Leave your cheese at home Bill Don't fly your cheese to town He sang a song as on he rode His cheese wired at his hips He rode into a cattle town A smile upon his lips He stopped and walked into an airport bar And laid his money down But his mother's words echoed again Don't fly your cheese to town son Leave your cheese at home Bill Don't fly your cheese to town He drank his first strong liquor then to calm his shaking hand And tried to tell himself he had become a man A cranky traveller at his side began to laugh him down And he heard again his mothers words Don't fly your cheese to town son Leave your cheese at home Bill Don't fly your cheese to town Filled with rage then Billy Joe reached for his cheese to slice But the stranger drew his creese and cut it Before he even saw As Billy Joe fell to the floor The crowd all gathered 'round And wondered at his final words Don't fly your cheese to town son Leave your cheese at home Bill Don't fly your cheese to town OP by Fridays Child: Why would YOU embed wires in your cheese? Why would anyone embed wires in cheese and take it on a plane? I'm thinking that IF it really happened the way the media are reporting it, the whole thing was just a really stupid and bad joke. But, regardless of the reason it was done, I'm not feeling threatened by it. Are you? response #1 by missb: Depends. Was it Velveeta? :scared: response #19 by kenny blankenship: To bring it back to life of course, but first you must implant it with a recently deceased brain Airplanes are often struck by lightning while in flight. The revivification process requires instantaneously high voltages as well as high amperage, and the body of an airplane is conductive. Taking a wired up cheese, prepped with a brain for vivification, onboard a commercial flight is just good science and economy. It does not have to be a human brain. The brain of a dog or a Republican will work as well; but some choices, for example the brain of a mouse, lead to problems of longterm viability. response #32 by Canuckistanian: They hate us for our cheese And also pimento loaf. On a thread by babylonsister: McCain's Media Team Resigns, Futher Shaking Up Campaign response #1 by AndyA: Hi, John. Welcome to Has Been Estates. Where old men with trophy wives are always welcome. Your orientation will begin in January, 2009. On a thread by rodeodance: Boys Face Sex Trial for Slapping Girls' Posteriors "Cory Mashburn and Ryan Cornelison, both 13, were arrested in February after they were caught in the halls of Patton Middle School, in McMinnville, Ore., slapping girls on the rear end. Mashburn told ABC News in a phone interview that this was a common way of saying hello practiced by lots of kids at the school, akin to a secret handshake.,," response #11 by TheBorealAvenger: & what about football players giving each other a pat on the ass? A tradition I vaguely remember from high school. response #13 by SeattleGirl: Homa-sex-shuals!!!!! All of 'em!!! Send 'em to deprogramming STAT!! Football is a MANLY sport! Football is FULL of TESTOSTERONE! There's no ass-patting in football!!!!!! The world will come to an END if this is allowed. An END, I tell ya! An END!!! Marriages will be threatened!!! Children will be harmed!!!! God will throw lightening and thunder at us!!!! Locusts will descend upon us!!! BABY JESUS WILL CRY!!!! Why do football players HATE America??????? :cry: :cry: :cry: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: On a thread by babylonsister: More terra, anyone? General: Al-Qaida making new cells in US response #1 by helderheid: as long as they aren't embryonic stem cells... On a thread by NNN0LHI: McCain says the Iraqis will follow U.S. troops to the United States if they leave response #2 by soothsayer: then the troops should move serpentine! serpentine! and lose them. response #6 by Junkdrawer: An awfully long (and wet) walk for all but the wealthiest Iraqis.... Now, if Jet Blue sets up a Super-Saver direct service.... response #18 by Toasterlad: Poor Johnny. Now It's Just Sad. Doesn't someone have a nice farm somewhere he could live on? He could spend his last days chasing rabbits and lying in the sun. He was a good boy, but his time has passed. OP by Robb: I will be running against Skinner for Admin in the next DU election. Since I will be running as a Democrat, I expect my endless rants against him to remain unchecked. The gloves will come off, I fully intend to question his leadership and speling skils. So vote for me. ...What? What do you mean it's not an elected position? :D Come and see the violence inherent in the system! Help! I'm being repressed!! response #2 by terrya: He's WAY ahead of you in the fundraising department. Just so you know. :-) response #4 by Writer: On what, the Dingbat ticket? ;) response #6 by Gormy Cuss: You'll have no chance of winning. Elad programmed the voting machines and EarlG is the election commissioner. On a thread by applegrove: Novak to be up again on Situation Room. Calls * a "Connecticut Liberal." response #1 by SpiralHawk: Actually, * is a Skull & Boner fatcat fascist republicon elitist preppy Nutmegger Let us be PRECISE in our use of terminology, Mr. Novak, you honorless, malfeasant, treason-enabling propaganda-spouting republicon butt-kisser, you. On a thread by earthside: Rasmussen thrown off Tour de France response #3 by seasat: Rasmussen? I bet it was due to biased polling. Well, someone had to make the joke. On a thread by RamboLiberal: Front yard vegetable patches make food, but some gardens rile the neighbors response #1 by slowry: pomme de terre-orists n/t On a thread by taterguy: Pssst, they're talking about breasts in GD Enjoy it while you can, not sure how long that thread is going to last... response #3 by taterguy: Show's over Missing thread now response #6 by kay1864: How will I ever learn about breasts NOW??? :cry: On a thread by Maat: Apparently, only American Conservative Christians can save us! "Only the United States, and more specifically, only the conservative, evangelical Christians of America are who stand between radical Islam and their quest for global domination... ... only Christianity has the intellectual and spiritual horsepower to defeat radical Islam and prevent the world from returning to the darkness of the 7th century..." response #1 by pepperbear: "...prevent the world from returning to the darkness of the 7th century...." Yeah, the darkness of the 9th century should suffice. :eyes: On a thread by cat_girl25: Attention DUers! You all are a bunch of LOSERS! "HOUSTON (AP) — Republican presidential candidate Rudy Giuliani called Democrats "the party of losers" for demanding a scheduled pullout of U.S. troops from Iraq..." response #1 by cloudbase: His Assholiness was here in Houston, and it didn't even make the local news. response #11 by BlooInBloo: That's an upgrade from being the party of slavery. On a thread by simskl: Specter is back on the bus "Sen. Arlen Specter of Pennsylvania, the ranking Republican on the Senate Judiciary Committee and a harsh Gonzales critic, said he doesn't support Schumer's request for a special prosecutor..." response #5 by malaise: But, but, but Fox gave him a (D) yesterday. OP by Jackpine Radical: What really happened on that AF1 flight... "Arlen, would you rather land back in DC or in a Special Place in Poland?" "...Uh, DC, Mr. President." "OK, Arlen. How ya feelin' 'bout that speshul persecutor bidniss?" "Not a good idea, Mr. President, Your Highness, Sir. Not a good idea at all." "OK, Take 'er to DC." On a thread by Hamlette: Update: Only McCain and Paul agree to do a Youtube debate. Scared? response #5 by Canuckistanian: I'd be surprised if they knew what "Youtube" meant They probably think it's an oil company. OP by Swede: Breakfast at the White House Dick Cheney and George W. Bush were having breakfast at the White House. The attractive waitress asks Cheney what he would like, and he replies, "I'd like a bowl of oatmeal and some fruit... "And what can I get for you, Mr. President?" George W. looking up from his menu, replies with his trademark wink and slight grin,.... "How about a quickie this morning?" "Why, Mr. President!" the waitress exclaims "How rude! You're starting to act like Mr. Clinton! As the waitress storms away, Cheney leans over to Bush and whispers.......... "It's pronounced, 'Quiche' " ! On a thread by SHRED: "Reefer Madness" in the U.K. "A single joint of cannabis raises the risk of schizophrenia by more than 40 per cent, a disturbing study warns. The Government-commissioned report has also found that taking the drug regularly more than doubles the risk of serious mental illness..." response #3 by OrangeCountyDemocrat: I Guess I'm Fucked Mentally Deranged response #13 by loudsue: That's two of us. In fact, I'm sitting here right now, mentally ill as hell, and I'm not even worried about it! In fact, I'm going to get even MORE mentally ill right now. response #26 by MisterP: would 3 spliffs give you a 120%, or is it a Zeno's arrow kinda thing? 40%, then 64%, 78%, 87%, 92%, 95%, 97%, und so weiter? response #33 by formercia: Seeing 'Reefer Madness' and believing it will increase your chance of mental illness to 100%. On a thread by unhappycamper: Half of Baghdad Without Power for Ten Days response #6 by PA Democrat: There goes the liberal media. Of course they don't report on the half of Baghdad that DOES have electricity! :sarcasm: On a thread by sabra: USNews: WH advisers concerned that Bush "looks like he doesn't have control over the government" response #1 by babylonsister: Looks like? Ya think?? nt response #14 by jimshoes: But first, he's got a vacation to go on. On a thread by kpete: Novak: “I’m 76 years old, and pretty soon I’m going to a place where there are no blogs.” response #2 by blogslut: There is no Internet in Hell Bob Novak confirms it! response #18 by zbdent: Novak's going to a place where he sees Clinton getting a BJ from Pamela Anderson ... Novak says "I'd like that position!" The manager of the place says "Okay, Pam. Your replacement's here ..." response #19 by blackops: Why wait? Let's bury him now. nt OP by blondeatlast: Time once again for--NEWS DUMP! Yes, it's Friday in DUerland. It's time to predict the big news no one else will be discussing next week, and what a banner week we have to choose from already! The surge is working, unless it's the electricity! Contemptuous KKKarl Rove--In contempt! Gong Show Gonzo! DoJ vampires--they suck the blood out of hospitalized, sedated victims! O--you call it! Bonus points for including Ralph Nader or Cindy Sheehan's candidacy without violating DU rules. Grand Prize--a DUzy award* *DUzy awarded only if your reply is sufficiently witty, garners 75 responses, grammatically and spelling correct, at least 5 responses get deleted, Will Pitt* AND H20Man respond but Skinner doesn't, and your thread must not be locked for any reason. :evilgrin: Good luck! On a thread by BamaLefty: Why, Massachusetts? Why? According to the latest SurveyUSA opinion poll, Shrub has a 42% approval rating in Alabama. When I first saw that, I was thrilled. Then, out of curiosity, I checked the percentages in some of the bluer states. What did I find? Minnesota was 29%, California at 25%, New York was 23%, and Massachusetts at 19%! 19 percent! Why must you torture me? I jest I jest... response #2 by IanDB1: There are so few Bush bumper stickers now, that the muscles in my middle finger are atrophying. n/t response #7 by stellanoir: Apparantly his approval rating in RI is so bad they don't even bother asking any more. On a thread by Maraya1969: Hey C-Span 2 They just shut the doors because of all the yelling outside! :bounce: :bounce: :bounce: :bounce: :bounce: Someone complained that they could not concentrate with all the yelling. response #2 by sfexpat2000: Have it on but not really watching. What are we yelling about today? :hi: response #3 by alyce douglas: excuse me, those are we the people who are yelling!! response #4 by sfexpat2000: We don't know but we seem to be happy about it! :woohoo: :rofl: On a thread by El Supremo: Nacchio to prison for six years "A federal judge this morning ordered former Qwest chief Joe Nacchio to serve six years in prison and to pay $71 million in fines and forfeitures for illegal insider stock trades he made in 2001..." response #2 by Lautremont: And he was so good in 'The Karate Kid.'  On a thread by Wetzelbill: The DUzys have become so corporate lately response #5 by wildhorses response #6 by wildhorses The Lounge, July 21, 2007: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=105x6746201 OP by HawkeyeX: Care to update the Moran Photo Album? (Dialup warning, naturally) Plenty of great pics in the responses! GD, July 22, 2007: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=389x1399687 On a thread by blogslut: I Love this Photo! response #3 by eppur_se_muova response #5 by Patsy Stone response #9 by SoCalDem response #12 by TahitiNut GD, July 26, 2007: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=389x1446600 On a thread by IChing, with screencap by wakeme2008: I agree with what Faux News thinks of DemocraticUnderground.Com response #3 by C_U_L8R GD, July 27, 2007: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=389x1454921 |
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| The Straight Story
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Fri Jul-27-07 04:45 PM Response to Original message |
| 1. Kick - even though I did not make it this week :) |
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| EFerrari
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Fri Jul-27-07 04:49 PM Response to Original message |
| 2. Thanks, JeffR! |
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| Ghost in the Machine
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Fri Jul-27-07 04:50 PM Response to Original message |
| 3. I accept my DUzy with pride and many thanks!! |
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| mmonk
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Fri Jul-27-07 04:52 PM Response to Original message |
| 4. Enjoyed it all. |
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| stellanoir
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Fri Jul-27-07 04:53 PM Response to Original message |
| 5. 3rd rec without even reading |
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| malaise
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Fri Jul-27-07 04:59 PM Response to Original message |
| 6. Wow! |
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| Lautremont
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Fri Jul-27-07 05:01 PM Response to Original message |
| 7. Well! Another for my shelf. |
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| HCE SuiGeneris
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Fri Jul-27-07 05:02 PM Response to Original message |
| 8. K & R |
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| Robb
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Fri Jul-27-07 05:04 PM Response to Original message |
| 9. Holy crap! I won a DUzy! |
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| InternalDialogue
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Fri Jul-27-07 05:07 PM Response to Original message |
| 10. As always, brilliant. |
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| Hawkeye-X
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Fri Jul-27-07 05:16 PM Response to Original message |
| 11. Was that a DUzy for me for that moran photo album update idea? |
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| JeffR
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Fri Jul-27-07 05:19 PM Response to Reply #11 |
| 13. You bet! |
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| malaise
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Fri Jul-27-07 05:41 PM Response to Reply #11 |
| 15. That was fall down funny n/t |
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| Breeze54
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Fri Jul-27-07 05:17 PM Response to Original message |
| 12. Funny stuff! Congrats to the winners! |
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| tandot
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Fri Jul-27-07 05:26 PM Response to Original message |
| 14. My first DUzy. Thanks so much, JeffR. |
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| Lars39
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Fri Jul-27-07 05:56 PM Response to Original message |
| 16. I missed this one: |
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| helderheid
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Fri Jul-27-07 06:14 PM Response to Original message |
| 17. Jeff, these ae great and THANKS for mine! :) |
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| Patsy Stone
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Fri Jul-27-07 06:53 PM Response to Original message |
| 18. "Still waiting for Gorot, eh?" |
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| Kurovski
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Fri Jul-27-07 08:21 PM Response to Original message |
| 19. "pomme de terre-orists". Hot damn, the DUzy's just went all classy-like! |
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| annabanana
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Fri Jul-27-07 08:48 PM Response to Original message |
| 20. yippitie yippitie! |
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| Buzz Clik
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Fri Jul-27-07 09:54 PM Response to Original message |
| 21. A word to Writer ("Writer: A kind thanks to all Internet posters.") |
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| Laurab
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Fri Jul-27-07 09:59 PM Response to Original message |
| 22. A BIG K&R as always - I think your Wetzelbill/Kurovski sign |
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| JeffR
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Fri Jul-27-07 11:34 PM Response to Reply #22 |
| 25. I had to photoshop it with the two of them holding my |
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| Laurab
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Sat Jul-28-07 12:07 PM Response to Reply #25 |
| 32. Well it's a beautiful piece of work |
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| JeffR
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Sat Jul-28-07 01:02 PM Response to Reply #32 |
| 33. Kurovski's trying to preserve plausible deniability, I think |
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| Kurovski
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Sat Jul-28-07 09:19 PM Response to Reply #33 |
| 42. Actually, it's a very simple formula: just the truth. |
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| Laurab
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Sun Jul-29-07 01:42 AM Response to Reply #42 |
| 44. Exactly what I meant to say, |
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| Kurovski
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Sun Jul-29-07 03:30 AM Response to Reply #44 |
| 47. We're all about the love. |
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| Laurab
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Sun Jul-29-07 02:44 PM Response to Reply #47 |
| 52. Now I too am shedding a tear |
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| Kurovski
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Sun Jul-29-07 01:10 PM Response to Reply #44 |
| 51. RE: love. |
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| Laurab
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Sun Jul-29-07 02:52 PM Response to Reply #51 |
| 54. oh, it is all about the love |
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| Buzz Clik
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Fri Jul-27-07 10:13 PM Response to Original message |
| 23. OMG! Jesus on a trailer hitch! |
 :rofl: "Back when I was a messiah, I had to carry my cross through the streets. People throwing stones, crown of thorns. What the HELL is with these kids today?" |
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| formercia
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Sat Jul-28-07 04:27 PM Response to Reply #23 |
| 39. Takes a plastic Jaysus to a new level. |
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| eridani
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Fri Jul-27-07 10:20 PM Response to Original message |
| 24. And that's the SECOND one for cooking and baking! n/t |
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| Kurovski
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Sat Jul-28-07 09:23 PM Response to Reply #24 |
| 43. There are wits there sharp enough to cut the hardest cheese. |
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| JeffR
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Fri Jul-27-07 11:41 PM Response to Original message |
| 26. Thank you all for supporting the DUzy Awards. |
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| Richard Steele
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Fri Jul-27-07 11:53 PM Response to Original message |
| 27. "There are so few Bush bumper stickers now, that the muscles in my middle finger are atrophying." |
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| sakabatou
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Sat Jul-28-07 12:05 AM Response to Original message |
| 28. Guess I'm not crazy enough for a DUzy |
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| EFerrari
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Sat Jul-28-07 01:42 PM Response to Reply #28 |
| 34. Don't kid yourself. |
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| sakabatou
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Sat Jul-28-07 02:44 PM Response to Reply #34 |
| 36. Lolz |
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| OzarkDem
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Sat Jul-28-07 08:08 AM Response to Original message |
| 29. Congrats to all1!!11! |
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| scarletwoman
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Sat Jul-28-07 08:28 AM Response to Original message |
| 30. "The Provolone Gunman Theory" -- *snarf* |
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| HeeBGBz
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Sun Jul-29-07 08:42 AM Response to Reply #30 |
| 49. I thank the gods for cheese threat levels moving from green to bleu. |
 |
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| Canuckistanian
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Sat Jul-28-07 09:13 AM Response to Original message |
| 31. "What are we yelling about today?" |
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| WilliamPitt
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Sat Jul-28-07 02:23 PM Response to Original message |
| 35. Someone gets a DUzy for calling me a drunk again. |
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| JeffR
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Sat Jul-28-07 02:53 PM Response to Reply #35 |
| 37. I read that as affectionate and not an attack |
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| EFerrari
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Sun Jul-29-07 01:52 AM Response to Reply #35 |
| 45. What if I ask Jeff to give you a retro Duzy for calling me a harpy? |
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| Buzz Clik
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Sun Jul-29-07 09:31 AM Response to Reply #35 |
| 50. I'm missing something -- I thought one could post on DU only if drunk. |
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| jeff30997
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Sat Jul-28-07 04:18 PM Response to Original message |
| 38. Thanks again for your great work JeffR !!! |
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| krispos42
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Sat Jul-28-07 05:12 PM Response to Original message |
| 40. Another notch in my gunbelt. 12 so far |
 Call me the "DUzyslinger". Stephan King's gonna write a series about me. Maybe 10 volumes or so.... :-) |
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| terrya
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Sat Jul-28-07 05:16 PM Response to Original message |
| 41. Well, there's my 15 minutes of fame....thanks, JeffR! |
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| Eurobabe
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Sun Jul-29-07 02:52 AM Response to Original message |
| 46. You all are DUzys!! |
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| SalmonChantedEvening
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Sun Jul-29-07 06:58 AM Response to Original message |
| 48. Fortunate yet again to be given a DUzy :) |
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| spanone
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Sun Jul-29-07 02:48 PM Response to Original message |
| 53. YO ! |
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| Maat
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Mon Jul-30-07 12:23 AM Response to Original message |
| 55. Hey, my thread made it ... even though ... |
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