Satan, bush, and hitler were in a bar together

[The Straight Story]

Satan buys em all a round.

Hitler: "I'll have...uh water!"
Satan: "Give me a flaming Moe."
bush: "anything with alcohol in it."

bush turns to hitler "Sooo...what brings you here?"
"Well, Satan lost a game of darts with me, so I was given one request. I wanted to come here and defend my honor - people are talking you know, saying you have done worse than I did when I was here." Hitler glared at bush.

bush looked over at satan and smirked.

Hitler reaches out and slaps bush "Wipe that smirk off your face asshole. I started a war that killed 25 million people. I turned the swastika into an eternal symbol of hate, the effects of my existence will never be forgotten. And what have you done you little wuss???"

bush sucks down another shot and thinks for a minute.

"well, let me tell you. You did a lot in a short time I admit. But you failed in your mission. So I improved on it. These wars I started, well they are just a distraction. In my time, thanks in a large part to me, we will see many millions die from diseases we could have cured and I didn't give people what they needed to do so, we will have massive climate change which I have ensured we are not working to combat (that is the real terror threat), I helped slow the fight against the spread of aids - which will help kill millions more, I have made sure health care is not readily available which has had a lasting effect on people...."

He stops, takes another sip, "You see, hitler, your problem was you used your power to just do things, like kill people. Me? I have done that AND used my power to keep things from being done which will help kill millions more even after I am out of power. And I still have about 17 months left in power to make it all worse. Financial markets, people dying of hunger, and it goes on and on - but I need to leave, I have an entire world to fuck up."

hitler stood up and shook bush's hand "You win."

Satan smiled at bush and said "Good job son."

[sakabatou]

1. LMAO

[Cetacea]

2. Well done and sad.

Would you mind if I used this in one of my "reply all" responses to right wing fwd chain mails?

[The Straight Story]

4. Go for it

I would probably have done better but missing some keys on the laptop and typing is a chore - getting a new laptop tomorrow anyway so I will endure :)

[autorank]

3. Extremely well done!!! RECOMMENDED n/t

[jeff30997]

5. LOL!

Great story! 2 Thumbs up!

[Jack Rabbit]

6. This reminds me of Voltaire's remark about Cardinal Mazarin

He should be forgiven for all the good he didn't do.

[DeSwiss]

7. Proud to Kick this....

...to the Greatest Page!!!!

[Vidar]

8. Cute.

[SydneyBristow]

9. flaming moe!

nice detail, lmao

:toast:

[formercia]

10. What you do in life will echo through eternity.

:rofl:


Junior is the Supernova of Evil.

[Synnical]

11. Well Done. n/t

[DangerDave921]

12. Comedy Rule

First off, a joke has to be funny. Listing out all the ways Bush has (or will) kill people doesn't make this a good joke. I don't get the comedy aspect of it.

Might as well just say, "That Bush, he sure is one evil bastard."

[The Straight Story]

13. That DangerDave21 sure has no sense of humor

there, short and sweet :)

[shadowknows69]

14. We've all said "That Bush is one evil bastard"

But someone like Straight Story does it with such style. K+R.

[Toasterlad]

20. Yes, a Style That is Not Comedic.

Sorry, but Danger Dave is right. There is no way this is a joke. Which would be fine: there's nothing wrong with what was posted, and I certainly agree that Bush is evil, but it was set up as a joke, and I was disappointed to find no humor (except for the Flaming Moe, which was pretty funny).

[BlooInBloo]

16. His statement was so manifestly stupid, that I assume he's kidding.

[druidity33]

18. i took it as a parable, not a joke... nt

[truedelphi]

21. I didn't find myself laughing either

It was just a list of things the guy did that are hurting us as we type

[BlooInBloo]

15. I regret that I have but one K&R to give to this thread.

[Hydra]

17. K&R

you forgot the Nukes- Hilter never managed to cobble those together, though he tried. Bush would like to use those to go out shopping for new property with.

[Mme. Defarge]

19. GHWB as Satan ...

why not?