The Gettysburg Address.

[The Straight Story]

Four score and seven years ago our fathers brought forth on this continent, a new nation, conceived in Liberty, and dedicated to the proposition that all men are created equal.

Now we are engaged in a great civil war, testing whether that nation, or any nation so conceived and so dedicated, can long endure. We are met on a great battle-field of that war. We have come to dedicate a portion of that field, as a final resting place for those who here gave their lives that that nation might live. It is altogether fitting and proper that we should do this.

But, in a larger sense, we can not dedicate -- we can not consecrate -- we can not hallow -- this ground. The brave men, living and dead, who struggled here, have consecrated it, far above our poor power to add or detract. The world will little note, nor long remember what we say here, but it can never forget what they did here. It is for us the living, rather, to be dedicated here to the unfinished work which they who fought here have thus far so nobly advanced. It is rather for us to be here dedicated to the great task remaining before us -- that from these honored dead we take increased devotion to that cause for which they gave the last full measure of devotion -- that we here highly resolve that these dead shall not have died in vain -- that this nation, under God, shall have a new birth of freedom -- and that government of the people, by the people, for the people, shall not perish from the earth.

http://showcase.netins.net/web/creative/lincoln/speeches/gettysburg.htm

[intaglio]

1. Re-written for *bush

Long tymago some fellas kicked ass and got 'emselves a nice, little place.

Now we are havin' to kick ass again to make sure we get respect. 'Cos o' this we put out a contract for to build us a memorial to the brave men who served in the Texas Air National Guard. I am pleased to announce that the Bush Memorial Chicken and Rib Shack will be placed here by our friends at Haliburton for only $2.5bn.

But on a more solemn note we will also build a small Megachurch dedicated to the mother of - us all. Yes! Here too we'll put up the Barbara Bush Chapel of Everlasting Debt where thanks can daily be given that I have freed us from the Commie Socialist Islamofascists who tried to deny us our rightful oil. But this is not the end of your work, 'cos we Bush's won't abandon you, rather we will stay to lead you thru the difficult times ahead. More enemies await; like the Gore-shevik Democrat Global Warming Army, who will seek to dee-liberately cause disasters to prove their false prophet right. You will be frightened and rightly so for we Bush's will not cease to ensure that kingship of the people by the Bushes for big business will not be regulated.

[WinkyDink]

2. Spot on!! Heh: He can't do the math.