Cary Tennis at Salon.com: "How Can I Love My Republican Parents?"

[Hissyspit]

http://www.salon.com/mwt/col/tenn/2007/08/24/republican_father

How can I love my Republican parents?
The people who gave birth to me support George Bush. How can that be?

By Cary Tennis

Aug. 24, 2007 | Dear Cary,

How can I love my parents when they are supporters of the most corrupt, willfully ignorant, deceitful, lying administration in our nation's history?

If we were not related by blood, I would have nothing to do with these people. The Bush presidency has ruined our reputation in the world, destroyed many of our civil liberties and increased the divide between the rich and the poor. Plus they think torture is just dandy!

I don't have any Republican friends. I don't like to talk to Republicans mostly. I find them ignorant of other cultures, and smug -- feeling that our country is the best in the world -- period.

I lived in a foreign country for several years and have traveled to several others. I find many things good about America but I think there are many things to be improved. When I visit my parents, politics is generally off the table for discussion. Occasionally it will come up with tense, sometimes angry results. They have no idea of my political thoughts and don't want to hear them. On the whole my relationship with them is better than many I've seen. We're not estranged, they didn't abuse me, but I don't really like them. I simply shut up and endure the visit.

I live on the East Coast, they live in the Southwest. I know I should love them. They supported me, helped me through college and such. But we have nothing in common and I dread seeing them. They embarrass me sometimes. Why should I spend time with people I don't like and resent for helping to lead my country in the wrong direction? Will I ever enjoy spending time with them again? It doesn't feel like it's possible. They say that you miss your parents when they're gone, no matter what your relationship was like. That might be true but I don't miss them now when they live 2,500 miles away. Can I change my attitude? I doubt it. Maybe you can shed some light.

A Bad Son

Dear Bad Son,

MORE

[Skittles]

1. you can love them, but you don't have to like them

yes INDEED

[fasttense]

2. I have the same problem but it is with both of my brothers,

one of my sisters, and my stepdaughter and her in-laws. It is easy to avoid my stepdaughter's in-laws but her husband is a real wacko. When we visited, he had all of Ann the man's books displayed prominently.

My two brothers both voted for the bushes twice. But recently they have stopped worshiping at the bush altar. In 2006, they turned on the republicans and voted for Democratic politicians. My one brother is a rabid Atheist. I can't understand why he would have thought the bushes were good for America because he hates religion so much. But they both still think republicons, torture, spying on American citizens and doing away with any form of welfare for the poor is a OK.

When I visited the brother who is the Atheist, his son told me "God is dead." I have no problem with that comment but my brother lives in the heart of Florida and his son goes to public school. The boy is in for some tough times being so outspoken about his Atheism.

My one sister recently converted to Orthodox Judaism. Her husband and she are doctors and they make huge salaries. They are the quintessential neocons. Their kids spout right wing talking points as if they are chants in a prayer.

I argue with my relatives but it gets us no where. They are good people, caring and loving but they are so willing to be conned by the bushes that I wonder sometimes if they just turn off their brains when it comes to politics.

They are a difficult group of people to love but I put up with visits about once a year. I have two other siblings who are liberals and my Mother is very liberal. It is an interesting note that the ones who worship the bushes all make huge salaries while the ones who are liberal are Middle Class.

[youngdem]

3. Can't reason someone out of something they weren't reasoned into

as the saying goes.


If you are religious, I guess you could take a 'love your enemy' attitude.

Personally, I just cut off anyone who is outspoken in favor of the Repukes, because I cannot tolerate or respect someone who does, and deep down, I wonder what else that reveals about their nature. For example, if I drop from a heart attack, are they going to blame me for eating poorly and take my wallet? (not serious...well, not completely)

To me, support of this cabal really just comes down to ignorance due to most people not taking any time to actually inform themselves from somewhere other than TV.

When I hear a young bushbot speak, I just look at them with kind pity, like you do when someone who is EXTREMELY STUPID is telling a joke. Ya know, a lips only smile, followed by a head or shoulder pat. That REALLY pisses them off, but it humiliates them and shuts them up, which is of course the point.

[Sedona]

4. Pity them

I just pity my mega-church going, bush-bot, relatives.

[MrScorpio]

5. If I could lock an entire family up in a house, Big Brother stylee, it would be yours

Your story has all the earmarks of a great reality TV show

Sit back and enjoy the ratings while the sparks are a flying!

[mitchum]

6. Abandon them in their old age since they don't mind burdening your children...

and their children with a crippling national debt.
Just drop them off at a bus terminal or dogtrack or something.
Surely they will understand.

[MadHound]

7. Dear Bad Son, you're being an idiot

If you are allowing politics run and ruin your life to the point where you are considering not interacting with your parents, you need to back away slowly and try to get some perspective.

Sure, politics is important, but allowing it to dictate who you do and do not interact with is crazy. I live in the middle of a red county, with conservative neighbors, and if I allowed my politics to dictate who I inacted with out here I would be a hermit. There are many other areas of common interest, and while I don't shy away from politics, it isn't the dominant force in my life or my relationships. Hell, I look at it as a chance for me to do stealth conversions.

And if the worst thing that he can criticize his parents for is their politics, then frankly he's being a whiny little child. There are many, many people who's relationships are strained and torn by real problems such as abuse and mental illness, yet they manage to keep a relationship together and heal their wounds. Threatening to abandon your parents over their politics is simply immature and juvinile. Grow up and stop being a whiny child.

[donsu]

8. my republican father didn't love me and I didn't love him

one of my children has drank the kool aide and violently refuses to talk about anything.

makes me think of our civil war when families were torn apart.

what is, is.