Bill O'Rielly changes his mind on terrorists;

[greiner3]

Maybe We Should Try Coddling The Terrorists

I want to make myself clear, right from the get-go: I hate terrorism. Those of you who follow the Factor know that I have never been a fan. Never will be either. I think what they do, particularly to children, violence-wise, is unforgivable.

That said, I'm beginning to suspect that we've been going about this War on Terror all wrong. Before, I said we should treat the terrorists like the vile dogs that they are. But even vile dogs respond well to getting patted once in a while. So perhaps the best way to stop these jihadists from destroying our way of life is to do what the liberals have been proposing all along: start coddling them.

The "blame America first" crowd wants to invite these crazed Islamic extremists to visit Main Street USA, and I say let's give it a shot. Let's invite them into our homes, put them up in the guest bedroom with the good linens, and fluff up their pillows real nice. But let's not stop there. Let's take those heartless murderers out to our finest restaurants, order them appetizers and wine and dessert and then pick up the tab.

Look, folks, we don't really have a lot of options left. We've spent six long years fighting this war, and I don't feel any more safe than I did when we began. So why not call up this Muqtada al-Sadr fellow and tell him that the whole Iraqi shooting match is his for the taking?

>snip<















http://www.theonion.com/content/node/66395

Made you look! :rofl:

[Richardo]

1. I would not have been the least bit surprised if that was a real transcript.

Even the Onion can't satirize he who is himself a satire.

[wtmusic]

2. Yup, that IS O'Reilly nt

[rurallib]

3. It is getting so hard to tell Onion stories from real stories any more

[Cirque du So-What]

4. I shoulda knowed!

As I read the excerpt, I thought that O'Loofah was attempting satire...until I realized that it was too clever by half to have originated in his constipated imagination or from one of his hack writers. The Onion is a national treasure!

[Prophet 451]

5. You got me

What does it say about political commentry these days that I have to check the URL to figure if it's satire or not?

[MidwestTransplant]

6. Give them a tate of our finest falafel

[zbdent]

7. until I saw "the onion" at the end, I thought it was him rationalizing the Dole

payoffs to terrorists ...