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If you threw a party and conservatives showed up how would you know

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rpannier Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Sep-28-07 09:10 AM
Original message
If you threw a party and conservatives showed up how would you know
Edited on Fri Sep-28-07 09:12 AM by rpannier
If you threw a party and there were conservatives there, how would you know?

The conservative would probably be talking endlessly about how bad segregation and separate-but-equal were. How making one race of people superior to other races in the eyes of the law was a bad thing. That conservative would be talking about how he believes in equal rights for all. That people of all backgrounds should be allowed to fully participate equally in society -- Something that conservatives and their allies in the government were suspicious of, spied on and arrested people for believing. Something liberals were advocating 50-60+ years ago and were mocked as traitors and anarchists for advocating.

The conservative would probably be talking about how he believes that it's a good idea that women can work outside the home now. That the expansion of opportunities for women is a good thing for society. That women could be more than just teachers, airline stewardesses and secretaries-- again, something liberals were advocating about 40 years ago and conservatives were deriding as something that was bad for women, bad for the family and bad for society.

The conservative would probably be talking about how strong our Democracy is, that we can stand criticism of the government (not too much criticism unless we're talking about Pelosi, Clinton and Reid) -- something liberals were saying and doing 40 years ago and being blacklisted as undesirables and communists.

The conservative may even be talking about how he supports a woman's reproductive right (not the arch fundie ones). How it is a woman's right to choose whether or not to terminate the pregnancy. -- something liberals supported 40 years ago and conservatives opposed.

You might be able to tell the conservative by the three police officers dragging him away from your house for trespassing. Because, like everything else in life...he arrived very late to the party, so late in fact, that the party is over and has been for quite sometime.

A conservative, for the most part, is just that....a liberal who is 20 years or more too late to the party-- the party being enlightenment.

Conservatives, for all their bluster, pompous idiocy and claims to the contrary are almost always behind the times...

they were opposed to the American Revolution and becoming a Republic,
they were opposed to ending slavery,
they were opposed to a public school system,
they were opposed to Child Labor Laws,
they were opposed to a 40 hour work week,
they were opposed to ensuring that the quality of food was safe,
they were opposed to a National Park system,
they were opposed to T. Roosevelt's Square Deal
they were opposed to women getting the vote,
they were opposed to the entire New Deal,
they were (are) opposed to a minimum wage,
they were opposed to stopping the Nazi's (even after the war some claimed we should have only gone to war with Japan, even though Germany and Italy declared war on us within days after Pearl Harbor)
they were opposed to ending segregation
they were opposed to one-man, one-vote
they were opposed (and many still are) to the Miranda warning

The answer is fairly simple...they'd be the people boasting about their core American beliefs, the things they hold dear, the things that have made America great...things that liberals were talking about 20,30, 50, 100, 200+ years ago when these were unpopular and required men of vision to challenge societal beliefs in order to make society better.
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Bluebear Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Sep-28-07 09:11 AM
Response to Original message
1. Simple: they'd bring the cheapest crap as hors d'ouevres/hostess gift etc.
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ret5hd Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Sep-28-07 09:18 AM
Response to Original message
2. Except for #1 in your list, i think they are still opposed to ALL those things.
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Chipper Chat Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Sep-28-07 09:27 AM
Response to Original message
3. By their haircuts!
The men would all look like Trent Lott and Duncan Hunter.
The women like Peggy Noonan or Lauren Bacall circa 1950.
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youthere Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Sep-28-07 09:32 AM
Response to Original message
4. I'd spot them instantly. Those giant sticks in their asses are a dead giveaway.
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NavyDavy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Sep-28-07 09:34 AM
Response to Original message
5. he'd be the one in the bathroom trying to pickup guys or texting
your teenage children....
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rpannier Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Sep-28-07 09:45 AM
Response to Reply #5
7. I'm safe on that one...I think
I have only girls...

I'd have also included that my oldest is only in 6th grade, but for some of them 6th grade, 5th grade and twin 3rd graders might be prime age material.
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rateyes Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Sep-28-07 09:36 AM
Response to Original message
6. They'd be the ones arriving in SUV's
with that "fishy" thing on the back of it.
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Guaranteed Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Sep-28-07 09:47 AM
Response to Original message
8. The 18-pack of Miller High Life. nt
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rpannier Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Sep-28-07 09:54 AM
Response to Reply #8
9. Probably not anymore...
I heard that lunatic bill donahoe -- the guy from the Catholic league, has them in his sites.
He's gonna do to Miller what he did to Wal-Mart...according to him.

I guess Miller has an ad campaign aimed at homosexuals.
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