I need help with Bill Kristol...

[Bicoastal]

Is the guy a social conservative as well as a policy conservative? Would he be in favor of, say, teaching promoting abstinence to schoolkids instead of Sex Ed 'n' condoms?

If you help me, I'll tell you why I'm trying to figure this out.

[islandmkl]

1. i'll help you...you hold his arms behind his back....

while i hold his head in a 'non-torturing' waterboarding exercise

[annabanana]

2. I don't think he has any thoughts on , or of sex at all. . .

I think he's a eunuch

[SoCalDem]

3. May I suggest?

[Bicoastal]

4. Look, it's a joke for a show I'm writing.

It's at a party and one of the characters is extremely conservative--think Ann Coulter but more attractive and less liberal--and she ends up pissing everyone off because of her beliefs.

So I need to know about Bill Kristol because she gives one of the other (not too bright) characters a flyer entitled "Abstinence Makes the Heart Grow Fonder" and says "Pretty good title, huh? I'm ashamed to say I didn't come up with it--that was Bill Kristol's idea."

Other character: "Didn't he used to host the Oscars?"

Coultersque character: "You're not really much of a 'current events' person, are you?"

[rox63]

14. He's a neo-con, not a social conservative

I believe he was one of the co-signers of the PNAC charter.

[Ken Burch]

17. That said, the neocons always went along with what the socons wanted on sex 'n stuff

They didn't obey the new rules themselves, believing that chastity was meant for the peasantry.

Just like all the staunch defenders of "Victorian family values" in 19th Century England who inveiged against fornication, masturbation and "buggery", then unwound with nightly visits to the brothels and bondage porn that featured precious memories of "matron" back at school.

[Ichingcarpenter]

19. Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha!

But that wasn't a dead parrot.




I'm sorry sardonicism and black humor are not your strong point.


How to write comedy:



http://www.writersblock.ca/fall1999/feature2.htm

[Bicoastal]

20. Sure thing, anonymous Internet poster.

[Ichingcarpenter]

22. the link I gave you is a good link on writing comedy or drama

writers block is a great site. Take it or leave it.

[Bicoastal]

23. I'll take it into consideration...

...but

A) It's a play, not a comedy sketch

B) The particular joke isn't meant to be a knee-slapper--it's more about establishing character than anything else, since the Colteresque character has JUST entered the scene for the first time. It's a throwaway--if it gets a couple chuckles I'll be gratified.

C) My forte is music/lyrics, not comedy. But I'm writing this original musical to be performed as part of my Masters concert, and believe me, it's hilarious. I've a got a friend, a professional comedy writer, who's seen the script and thinks it rocks.

D) You were incredibly rude to me below, so I'm inclined to leave it.

Thanks for your opinion.

[JBoy]

25. Sounds more like something Rick Santorum would say

Instead of "that was Bill Kristol's idea", how about "I got it from Bill Kristol who stole it from Rick Santorum"?

[SoCalDem]

26. hey.. the strike is over.. you are free to write with abandon..

don't make us do your work for your :P

[AlCzervik]

5. he really does not give a shit about social issues and he's in favor of guest workers

he's a mad neo con and most of the original ones do not give a shit about social issues.

[Bicoastal]

9. Ok, but I think I'm going to use the joke anyway.

The character probably could have come into contact with Kristol at some point...it's a throwaway, anyway.

[AlCzervik]

10. i think if teenagers were shown say a poster of Bill any desire they may have

had to have sex would be gone immediately.

[Ichingcarpenter]

6. You don't have a clue?

and you support who?

O' tahe.

[Bicoastal]

7. Why must you be so rude? I just asked a question. nt

[AlCzervik]

8. see post 5, there is your answer.

[Ichingcarpenter]

11. I'm not being rude

You're just amazing in your admission of ignorance.

[AlCzervik]

13. look not everybody knows them all you know? Du can be helpful that way.

i'm 40 so for these guys have been a fixture since Reagen and then Bush 1. Also older du'ers here, i've learned a lot about other political figures that were before my time.

[Ichingcarpenter]

15. I apologize

He is one the founding assholes that started this neo-con shit.
You got my blood boiling with his name.

This type of topic you choose to debate his standing on this issue
is a non issue which he would use just to distract.

[Truth2Tell]

12. Here's some hints

From: Right Web

During Ronald Reagan's presidency, Kristol worked on the staff of then-Secretary of Education William Bennett, a firebrand social conservative who went on to found a number of rightist letterhead groups, including Empower America and Americans for Victory over Terrorism. Kristol ran the unsuccessful 1988 U.S. Senate campaign in Maryland of Alan Keyes, a conservative Republican and Kristol's former graduate school roommate who was part of a team of rightists hired by Paul Wolfowitz to serve in the first Reagan administration's State Department policy planning staff. During the administration of George H.W. Bush, Kristol was chief of staff to Vice President Dan Quayle, earning the moniker "Quayle's Brain"

Edit for correct link:

http://rightweb.irc-online.org/ind/kristol/kristol.html

[scarletwoman]

16. Bill Kristol is a rabid imperialist and corporate globalist. He doesn't give a shit about where you

put your wang.

[Sugar Smack]

18. Here, I'll help ya:

[Postman]

21. "Always Wrong" William Kristol? Why bother? He doesn't know shit.

All he does is spew shit.

He's a liar and a shill for Israel.

[Bigmack]

24. Did you hear him on Daily Show ....

a couple of nights ago? He was actually able to keep Jon from just overpowering him, like usual.

But... and this is where the "always wrong" comes in.... he says History is gonna vindicate the War and Dumbya.

Man... I wish I had a bale of whatever that asshole is smoking.