A Liberal Goes Undercover to Brave America's Premiere Right-Wing Gathering

[Poiuyt]

Posing as a lobbyist for the American Milk Solids Council, one lefty blogger entered the belly of the CPAC beast.

==

WEDNESDAY NIGHT. When I arrive at the hotel, two members of the Young America's Foundation -- the omnipresent youth league that superceded the hippie-punching Young Americans for Freedom -- are trying to check in using a credit card not belonging to them. Rules are for poor people, and they seem to think that if they berate the poor West African guy working the front desk, they'll get what they want eventually. They may be wrong, but damn it, no late-shift immigrant is going to tell them that. Modern Washington, the Washington of Bush and CPAC, was built to keep people like him from telling people like them what to do.

The convention will be attended, largely, by two groups of people: the mainline Republican rump of 19-percenters, who think George W. Bush is doing a Brownian heck of a job, and the radical right, who think that the problem with George is that he's not heartlessly conservative enough. To put it another way, here we have the people who look at the wreckage of the American 2000s and pronounce it a wonderful thing and the people who look at it and say, "Yeah, it's pretty awful, but if we tried, we could make it a whole lot worse."

In the elevator up to my floor, two men in golf hats (golf hats? at 8 p.m.?) talk about how high taxes will cause the rich to flee the country and stop producing if Hillary gets into office. (They're apparently laboring under the misapprehension that Americans still produce things.) This is a real threat in the world of CPAC, while things like massive healthcare shortages, an increasingly ill-educated population, dependence on dwindling natural resources and the ever-widening gap between rich and poor are the stuff of fairy tales.

more -

http://www.alternet.org/story/77888/?page=1

A funny and scary article

[BleedingHeartPatriot]

1. This is really well done, satrical humor and insightful. I love his take on McCain's speech:

John McCain's not the brightest bulb on the Christmas tree, but he's surely smart enough to realize that he's among a group who wants a candidate slightly to the right of Father Coughlin. He establishes his conservative creds right away by talking about how the most important freedom of all is the freedom to be born without some vacuum-cleaner-wielding liberal getting all up in your fetusitude. He goes on to say the word "conservative" about eleventy seven billion more times, but honestly, he goes over like a lead balloon encased in a lead safe that has been thrown out of a lead airplane while someone plays Led Zeppelin III. There are exactly three times when he gets anything even remotely resembling raucous applause: (1) when he discusses lowering taxes; (2) when he disses Barack Obama; and (3) when he mentions Mitt Romney. He also apologizes constantly, saying that he knows he hasn't always been perfect and he counts on the cons in attendance to set him straight. But to this crowd, any admission of error is an admission of weakness, and every mistake is made by someone else. Anyone who still buys into McCain's reputation as a maverick should see him now, abasing himself before the rightest of the right: He may as well be wearing a "KICK ME" sign.

:rofl:

[guruoo]

2. Priceless!

"Leonard Pierce, American Milk Solids Council."

"I'm sorry? What is that?"

"It's an industry group for milk solids manufacturers. We lobby Washington lawmakers to
lessen regulations on the export of milk solids. The problem is that the government blames
us for the incompetence of African mothers."

"That is so unfair."

"Tell me about it."

:rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

[sharp_stick]

3. Fabulous Article

Thanks for posting the link I hadn't read it yet. I can only imagine how hard it would be to suppress the urge to puke when those entitled shits started that 4 more years chant.

[leftofthedial]

4. poor guy

thanks for posting

[Echo In Light]

5. K&R ...makes me think of drug addled Hunter Thompson infiltrating cop rallies!

:hippie:

[alfredo]

6. did he bathe in Clorox after that experience?

[Yael]

7. I couldn't have done it

I think my head would have popped right off my body.

Funny read!

[Turn CO Blue]

8. His description of * is dead on.

~snip~
"FRIDAY MORNING. George W. Bush, when you get right down to it, is a fucker. That's why I don't like him. He's a fucker who does fucked-up things. He's a privileged little shit who doesn't give a damp hell for the opinions of the people he was elected to govern. He buys into the toxic economic theories of unreconstructed capitalism, despite never having had to earn an honest living in his life, and he supports a worldview that cuts out anyone who hasn't had his good fortune -- the worldview of a murderous plutocracy stained with swaths of luck and cruelty where first is first and second is nobody. He's stupid in the truest sense of the word: willfully ignorant and determined to surround himself with people who keep him that way, not only resistant to different ideas but actively hostile towards them. He is neurologically incapable of thinking ahead, and he consigns the consequences of his actions to the status of dreams. And he forced his country into a pointless, unnecessary, unconscionably wasteful war that will poison every aspect of American life for generations."

[eppur_se_muova]

14. "He's stupid in the truest sense of the word" ... YES !! Not just a dimwit.

Bu**sh** is not incapable of thinking of better policies, he simply can't see any benefit in doing so, because it would only help make the world better for OTHER PEOPLE, a consequence he does not desire. He does not merely fail to see the better options, he actively dismisses them.

[The River]

9. Good Read...Thanks

for the link.

"McCain, not the brightest bulb on the Christmas tree" is an understatement.
The brightest bulbs on the GOP tree combined couldn't out shine
a broken night light

[moodforaday]

10. Oh this is good!

Of Bush: "Mr. I Can Has Legacy?"
:applause:

[BleedingHeartPatriot]

11. HAHAHAHA!

LOL, laughed out loud at that one! :rofl:

[SalmonChantedEvening]

12. Dubya's war speechafyin

"Afghanistan will never again be a safe haven for terrorists who wish to do us harm," he claims, using a strange interpretation of "never again" which apparently means "at some point in the future," since the last I heard the heirs to the Taliban were pretty much running roughshod over the joint.

-------------------------

Thanks for this Poiuyt, Mister Pierce's CPAC (which C baha) synopsis is chock full of gems like this.

:applause:

[iilana X]

13. K&R! Very descriptive story.

It's scary that these types (19-percenters LOL!) really exist.

edit to add because I LOVE this line:

"Here's a description of Hell they never give you: a huge room full of all the people you hate most, and they're all having a wonderful time." (Read the entire thing, it's worth the time.)

:rofl: