"My God is an awesome God and call with your credit card to pay $9.99 for total redemption.

[stellanoir]

It's the oldest scam in the books. "Do you want to go to heaven. . .?. . . then gimmee fifty bucks."

They just played these ads on TV repeatedly. I want to shoot my TV.

I have no gun except for a super soaker.

It's horse shit.

Humor is my religion and I'm stickin' to it.

Discuss and have fun.

Peace.

This evangelical stuff is getting totally ridiculous.

:silly: :silly: :silly:

[RevCheesehead]

1. I won't sell you anything.

Promise. :hi:

[stellanoir]

2. I'll barter with you anytime.

:hiya: back

[Beausoleil]

3. It's an old story

"Well the preacher kept right on saying that all I had to do was send
Ten dollars to the Church of the Sacred Bleeding Heart of Jesus
Located somewhere in Los Angeles, California
And next week they'd say my prayer on the radio
And all my dreams would come true"

The Stones were onto them.

[Speck Tater]

6. In the 1920's it was Billy Sunday on your radio

making himself rich on contributions from suckers

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Billy_Sunday

[stellanoir]

7. yeah put your hands on the radio

:woohoo:

[Beausoleil]

11. Which makes me think of "Elmer Gantry"

mentioned in the Wiki page you referenced.

'Sunday in turn referred to (Sinclair) Lewis as a member of "Satan's cohort."'

[cyberpj]

4. Oh. And by the way... Jesus and God want you to tithe 10% of your earnings to my "church".

Will that be cash or check?


George Carlin's latest HBO special has it right:
"It's all bullshit, and it's bad for ya'"

[irish.lambchop]

5. Opiate of the masses

[stellanoir]

12. truly

[NMMNG]

8. Indeed

Greed is Good. Send us $9.99 and we’ll tell you how to get yours (screw everyone else).

[Beausoleil]

13. We're going to up our contributions to Jesus

and if you want to be saved, well, up yours, too!

[NMMNG]

16. LOL

[awoke_in_2003]

19. That cat worships a false god

Belief in Ceiling Cat is true heresy :)

[NMMNG]

21. Ceiling Cat, LOL

[ayeshahaqqiqa]

9. Redemption is an inside job, you know

working on your own self. You can turn to help if you need it--helpers just seem to appear. If you think you must use money for this, your money will be gladly accepted, but if you realize it is a gift given freely, then you don't have to worry about that at all.

[malaise]

10. Getting totally ridiculous?

Religion is the oldest con on earth. The real good news is that not one of them has received a penny of our money.

[stellanoir]

14. It's all a scam on fear of death

yet that's nothing to fear really.

[malaise]

24. It's the absolute philosophical truth

Everything that lives will die.
I remember when we sat with my best friend's dad as he lay dying three years ago. He was nearly 87 years old, lucid as hell. We all chat for a while then he was quiet. Then he raised his head and began reciting Inviticus from start to finish. He told us he learned that poem in his first year in high school and said we must never forget that life was all we had do we must continue to enjoy it.

We then recited poems we learned at school and he recited those he knew with us. It was a lovely experience. He died that night as he lived - peacefully - an agnostic to the end - a wonderful, wise old lawyer with an unbelievable social conscience.

We are the masters and mistresses of our fate. No con man is living off my savings.

[Warpy]

15. This too shall pass

as anybody who's been constipated will tell you.

I knew this scam was on its way out when I read about a Christian porn website in the local paper a couple of years ago. Millennial fever is waning and the old guard of Dominionist ranters on television are all in their dotage. Once the rank and file start to cheat and the movers and shakers are starting to check out, it's done until the next century changes over.

That doesn't mean the world won't still be full of suckers who want to try to bribe their way out of hell and sleaze bags who will give them a place to try it. It means that as a mass movement, it's just about over. Their political and economic clout will fade, and they'll retreat to the fringes of mainstream religion, tracts and books for "donations" in the church vestibule.

[devilgrrl]

17. My Allah is an awesome Allah

:silly:

[GreenPartyVoter]

18. Yep. Organized religion is too often a scam. Personal spirituality is where it's at.

[trusty elf]

23. "Organized religion" is an oxymoron, it seems to me.

It makes some nifty anagrams, though.

IDOLIZE GROIN ANGER , GOD IRE IN GRAIL ZONE , DIRE AGONIZING ROLE,

REIGNING LIAR OOZED, NAZI GOON GIRDLE IRE, I DIG INANE ZORRO LEG,

I, DROLE NAZI GOERING, REAL GIN DIRGE IN ZOO, DOZING GENIE OR LIAR

[Feron]

20. Ah but the Pat Robertson tactic is much better...

He says that if you give the 700 Club (aka Robertson) money, then God will make you rich!!


Of course the joke is on the gullible folks that open their wallets.

[spoony]

22. Our society needs a Martin Luther to pound some Theses on their doors

and denounce this age-old scourge of indulgences.

[KamaAina]

25. Ah, but does that include shipping and handling?

That's where they get you. Have you checked out the shipping charges to Heaven these days?