Latest STUPID Bushism

[RazBerryBeret]

"There is some who say that perhaps freedom is not universal. Maybe it's only Western people that can self-govern. Maybe it's only, you know, white-guy Methodists who are capable of self-government. I reject that notion."—London, June 16, 2008

I can't even figure that out....WHAT is he trying to say????

then here are a few recent ones I missed (somehow)
slate has a complete list--could take you forever to get through, but very funny...
http://www.slate.com/id/76886/



"And I, unfortunately, have been to too many disasters as president."—discussing flooding in the Midwest, Washington, D.C., June 17, 2008



"There's no question this is a major human disaster that requires a strong response from the Chinese government, which is what they're providing, but it also responds a compassionate response from nations to whom—that have got the blessings, good blessings of life, and that's us."—Discussing relief efforts after a Chinese earthquake, Washington, D.C., June 6, 2008



"Let's make sure that there is certainty during uncertain times in our economy."—Washington, D.C., June 2, 2008



"I'll be long gone before some smart person ever figures out what happened inside this Oval Office."—Washington, D.C., May 12, 2008

and that last one goes without saying, right?

[Kutjara]

1. "And I, unfortunately, have been to too many disasters as president."

Yes, George, you have. Far too many.

[RazBerryBeret]

3. yeah, they seem to follow him...

[Kutjara]

5. Sort of like Jessica Fletcher or Miss Marple. Everywhere he goes...

...someone ends up dead. Yet nobody thinks, "how come he's always around when somebody's found with a croquet mallet up their ass?" Metaphorically speaking, of course.

[LWolf]

26. Better:

"I, of course, have been too many disasters as president."

[TechBear_Seattle]

2. Isn't "stupid Bushism" redundant? n/t

[RazBerryBeret]

4. oops, you're right!

oxymoron!!!

[TechBear_Seattle]

12. No, an oxymoron would be "clever Bushism"

Oxymorons are where you have two words together which are mutually exclusive. A few oxymorons:

- Jumbo shrimp
- Deafening silence
- Same difference
- Military intelligence
- Liquid gas
- Civil War
- Rush Limbaugh (oops, he's an Oxyconten moron, sorry)

Redundant is where you have two words that means the same thing, as in "stupid Bushism" :hi:

[Hardrada]

14. American diplomacy

[trusty elf]

15. Corporate responsibility?

[crickets]

20. Compassionate conservatism

[L0oniX]

37. Suppose you were an idiot. And suppose you were a member of Congress. But I repeat myself.

- Mark Twain, a Biography

[Rosa Luxemburg]

6. May 12, 2008, no Bush you won't be long till they find out

[RazBerryBeret]

9. yep, that May 12 one is pretty funny...

"I'll be long gone before some smart person ever figures out what happened inside this Oval Office."

he probably peed in the corner or something...

[SammyWinstonJack]

30. Arrogant as ever, isn't he? So sure he will never be held accountable for any of his crimes. He

probably knows something the rest of us don't. :shrug:

[GreenPartyVoter]

7. Oh, teh humanity!

[jimshoes]

8. No george, what has happened in that Oval Office

is a travesty and a tragedy. I'm not all that smart and you're still there. You are a disgrace.

[krispos42]

10. I took this screenshot on Tuesday

Says a lot, I think...

[CAG]

11. "Maybe it's only, you know, white-guy Methodists...."

"Maybe it's only, you know, white-guy Methodists who are capable of self-government. I reject that notion"

Yeah, after the example you've set, *, most people are starting to reject that notion.

[InkAddict]

16. Excuse me, don't the Catholics practice self-government.

on a global scale. The Vatican is a City-State that maintains diplomatic relations and maintains an Embassy, no? The Pope is the Spiritual Husband of The Church as voted by the College of Cardinals and the Ultimate Earthly Authority. Cardinals are elected; Dioceses are geographically/demographically set up to insure support and mission to which bishops and priests are appointed and charged with duty and invested? That might not be quite right, but I'm not Catholic.

He's so stupid, it's embarrassing.

[Rex]

13. He meant WASPs, but he is too stupid of a racist to remember.

Stupid no-nothing asshat.

[Hissyspit]

17. New Doonesbury Bushisms!

http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=389x3499518

[AnotherVietnamVet]

18. Stupid is as stupid does.

Forrest Gump's momma.

[WritersBlock]

19. In that first sentence, he's trying to hide the fact that he *is* that guy - and a racist pig.

He's used this straw man in the past, but he worded it slightly differently:

There's a lot of people in the world who don't believe that people whose skin color may not be the same as ours can be free and self-govern. I reject that. I reject that strongly. I believe that people who practice the Muslim faith can self-govern. I believe that people whose skins aren't necessarily -- are a different color than white can self-govern.
http://www.whitehouse.gov/news/releases/2004/04/20040430-2.html

I have NEVER, ever heard anybody say they feel this way. So where has Bush heard it?

Inside his own mind, that's where. And he's arrogant enough and stupid enough to assume that this is such a natural thing that it's safe to make a statement such as he did.

He just assumes that everybody else feels the same way he does, so he feels safe enough to say "there's a lot of people in the world" who feel that way.

But no one else would say that. At least not that I've ever heard.

Except for George W. Bush.

[RazBerryBeret]

21. either his own mind.....

or maybe he heard it from his dad or grandad...

I've never heard it before either, and it makes no sense....

[arcadian]

22. That's "white man's burden" talk.

I'm sure he was brought up on it.

[Maureen1322]

23. I am still shocked by the stuff that drop out of this guys mouth.

It's not even funny.

[undeterred]

24. "white-guy Methodists who are capable of self-government"

Obviously white-guy Methodists are incapable of governing anything, including themselves.

[two gun sid]

25. Goddamn, I wanna have a beer with that stupid fuck!

I like to say stupid shit too when I'm drunk off my ass!

[Overseas]

27. Why does anyone think we shouldn't impeach someone so obviously deranged?

[derby378]

28. I think I have the perfect response...

Mr. President, I'd like to introduce you to...
-> JIM

Hi, Mr. President?

Hello. Always nice to see you,
-> JIM
You know, the mainspring of this country, wound up as tight as it is, is guaranteed for the life of the watch. And who's watching? People like you,
-> JIM

Right on.

And you,
-> BARNEY
People who are alerted and unafraid to waste the little time that I've scheduled for your question.

Awwww, shoot, Mr. President...

State short question.

Wellll, Mr. President, it's the bees and spiders again! They stole my food stamps and sold them to the rats, and I tried to get down to my car for to honk the horn for help, but the snakes is guardin' it for the cockroaches! I go back upstairs, but the spiders has jammed the police lock! I ain't been inside for a week, and I know my that wife is sleepin' with the bees! Oh...

Could you state that as a question, please?

Well, sure, Mr. President! Where can I get a job?

Many busy executives ask me, "What about the Job Displacement Market Program in the city of the Future?"

That's right!

Well, count on us to be there,
-> JIM
Because if we're lucky tomorrow...

Awwwwwwww, he's jiving me again...ohhhhh...

we won't have to deal with questions like yours ever again.

Shit...no...

<< APPLAUSE >>

Thank you for question. Exit left to Funway.

All that wing and that go went around... (???)

Mr. President, I'd like to introduce you to...
-> BARNEY

Hello. Always glad to talk to you,
-> BARNEY

Ah - me, Sir? Well, I just want to...

You know, when you clock the human race with the stopwatch of History, it's a new record every time.

Ah, that's a cute story, Mr. President, but I...wan...

And who wins? And who loses? People like you,
-> BARNEY

Well...

And you,
-> UH, CLEM
People who are alter...

Stop, stop, Mr. President, please stop! Now, I know it means nothing to you, I'm only a clone, but you've got such a wonderful job and you're doing it so well. You know, we Bozos have a saying: "When you put on the nose, it grow...

Could you state that as a question?

It grow...

REDO
Thank you very much,
-> BARNEY

Ah...

You'll be getting a handsome simulfax copy of your own words in the mail soon...

No...

...and my reply.

Oh, by golly...

<< APPLAUSE >>

Mr. President...

Thank you for question.

You're beneficent...

Exit right to Funway.

Oh - ah, yes, Sir. Hey Harryette, how ya doin'?

Fine, how are you?

Mr. President, I'd like to introduce you to...
-> UH, CLEM

Hello. Always nice to see you,
-> UH, CLEM
You know, the springhead of this country, wound...

Uh, alright, stop, Mr. President - Mr. President, stop, please. Now listen to me - this is Worker speaking. Hello.

Hello. How are ya? State maintenance question.

Uh, fine, thanks, no, no. README DOCTOR MEMORY.

AMRAD
is not sure I understand you fully. Could you state that as a question, please?

README DOCTOR MEMORY?

SYSDAT
DIRECT READOUT
UPTIME 901
I have been awake for 9 hours...

Hey, maaan, ask him a question!

Shh!

...1 minute, 44 seconds.

Good, good...

AMULFAC SHUFFLE TIME:
Less than 1% of Freight Drain
LOGFILE:
5 jobs, 2 detached
MINIMUM ENTRY GATEWAY:

Equalimit? So boring...

Totally balance National Debt, 3, 4, 5, 6 boxcars.
GATE TO CLOSE

Okay, alright, you're doing fine - but, uh, this is a Flip-Flop, Springhead.

Flip-Flop?

"Flip-Flop?" What is this "Flip-Flop?"

Right. Now, I'm gonna ask you a question that you won't be able to answer.

I'm not sure I understand you fully.
LOGOUT RUNOFF MEMORY
A: The system is less energetic if domains of opposite direction alternate.
BM READ: MACNAM PMP READ: MACNAM

What is he TALKING about?

PASSWORD:
Maximum Output Resource Yield
ILLEGAL ENTRY
Try again.

Yes, we're going to try again. Open your Gate, Doctor.

SYS...POP...

That's right...

DAD...BOB...MOM...
MMMMMMMMMMMMM

Yes, yes...

PIP...DAD...DUD...

It's repeating, it's repeating...

It's got little squinty eyes out...

DID...MO...
MAAAAAA
MEM...MAHAM...

MEM. MEM.

MEM...MEM...MEM...MEM...MEM...

MEMORY.

DIRECT READOUT: DOCTOR MEMORY
-> UH, CLEM

Thank you, thank you. Now, now, Doctor, I'm speaking to you, Doctor...

MMMMMMMMMMM?

Something the Leprechauns asked me when I was a sprout in Indiana has always puzzled me. Uh, Doctor? Question. Evaluate.

MMMMMMMMMMM...

Why does the porridge bird lay his egg in the air?

What is he talking about?
LAUGH
RUN AWAY
What's going on in there, man?
I don't know, man...
The Doctor makes NO readout.
READ
UNHAPPY MACNAM
UNHAPPY MACNAM
SYSDAT UPTIME 901
I have been awake for 9 hours...
Hey man, go in there...
Oh, come on...
Man, go inside there...
No, no...
2 minutes, 36 seconds...
EMR
AT
ANSIT
PIER
This is a sickness.
I think he broke it, man...

{Snippet of Spanish}

I'm as TIRED OF IT as you are, and I hope THAT our children...

Get the guard.

Hey, I don't know, man, I think he's gonna break it, uh?

will COME TO love us AGain in some BETTER world than this.

Aw, damn...

<< APPLAUSE >>

Thank you for question. Exit center to Funway.

Okay, it's me now, uh? What did you do to him, man...? Okay...

Mr. President, I'd like to introduce you to...
-> UH, CLEM

No, maaaaaaaan!
Illegal character in line.
No, it's not Clem, man!
RUBOUT
Go away.
What's happening?
Just a second, will you, please?
I'm sorry, this ride is closed.

This ride is closed?!

Exit center to
FUN
AT
ODD
OOOOOOOUUUUUU...

I - I've been waiting for 10 minutes from here to listen to the President talk to me! What's happening? I think he broke - hey, Paolo? He broke the President! I'm gonna get my wife...

[Fire Walk With Me]

29. If Bush were stupid, he and his friends wouldn't still be in power and getting rich at our expense.

He's an incomplete human, yes, and cannot communicate effectively. However, there is hatred, fear, and a vast depth of passive-aggressive mockery and domination in his defective speech.

Translate everything he says into "fuck you" and you'll understand him better.

And yes, he and his friends have created an international energy monopoly, and we paid them to do it, in both tax dollars and American and Iraqi lives.

I see it in many areas of life- those who are defective, gain power and dominance over those who are better capable and more positive. And cause things to become darker and uglier. They snivel and mock and dominate, and are wrong and hypocritic and just ugly (all the while imagining themselves clean as driven snow, unconsciously becoming worse than anything they condemn).

Is it any wonder the country is in the shape that it is in? If it is in a bad place, it is indeed because of stupidity, but the stupidity is our own, in not immediately removing what is obviously a cancer upon the nation.

[Uncle Joe]

31. Okay, here you go

"There is some who say that perhaps freedom is not universal. Maybe it's only Western people that can self-govern. Maybe it's only, you know, white-guy Methodists who are capable of self-government. I reject that notion."—London, June 16, 2008"

I believe in the top paragraph, he is speaking about his perceived base.

"And I, unfortunately, have been to too many disasters as president."—discussing flooding in the Midwest, Washington, D.C., June 17, 2008"

In the second paragraph, he acknowledges his pResidency has been an unmitigated disaster and no matter what he does, he can't escape that fact. He's also looking forward to retirement so he can spend more time playing his Nintendo.

"There's no question this is a major human disaster that requires a strong response from the Chinese government, which is what they're providing, but it also responds a compassionate response from nations to whom—that have got the blessings, good blessings of life, and that's us."—Discussing relief efforts after a Chinese earthquake, Washington, D.C., June 6, 2008

In the third paragraph he believes the United States is blessed because there are only approximately eight months left in his maladministration. I also believe some cocaine may have been involved with that paragraph.

"Let's make sure that there is certainty during uncertain times in our economy."—Washington, D.C., June 2, 2008

I'm not certain about the fourth paragraph, but I believe more cocaine was involved.

"I'll be long gone before some smart person ever figures out what happened inside this Oval Office."—Washington, D.C., May 12, 2008"

Obviously in this last paragraph he hopes to be dead before someone with integrity comes to power that exposes his crimes, malfeasance and general incompetence.

[WhiteTara]

32. I don't know how long that long gone

will be. We have already figured out what happened inside that Oval Office. He desecrated the Constitution, robbed our country blind, and killed millions of people doing it. No, I don't think it will be long at all. I hope there are a bunch of US Marshalls with handcuffs greeting him at the door when he comes out.

[RazBerryBeret]

33. agreed....

I think we all have a general understanding of what went on inside that oval office.
I just wish us the strength and courage to do something about it.

[Marr]

34. The last one is comedic gold.

It's like he doesn't know what he's been doing for the last seven years.

[windoe]

35. He is an evil clown,

amusing yet terrifying at the same time. Not to be misunderestimated.

[SalmonChantedEvening]

36. "There is some who say"

And it all goes down hill from there.

I miss a lot of these because I am unable to cringe and listen at the same time.

"I don't particularly like it when people put words in my mouth, either, by the way, unless I say it."—Crawford, Texas, Nov. 10, 2007

:banghead: