JUST A BIKER

[Ghost in the Machine]

JUST A BIKER

I saw you, hug your purse closer to you in the grocery store line. But you didn't see me put an extra $10.00 in the collection plate last Sunday.

I saw you pull your child closer when we passed each other on the sidewalk. But you didn't see me playing Santa at the local Mall.

I saw you change your mind about going into the restaurant when you saw my bike parked out front. But you didn't see me attending a meeting to
raise more money for the hurricane relief.

I saw you roll up your window and shake your head when I rode by. But you didn't see me riding behind you when you flicked your cigarette butt out the car window.

I saw you frown at me when I smiled at your children. But you didn't see me, when I took time off from work to run toys to the homeless.

I saw you stare at my long hair. But you didn't see me and my friends cut ten inches off for Locks of Love.

I saw you roll your eyes at ourleather jackets and gloves. But you didn't see me and my brothers donate our old ones to those that had none.

I saw you look in fright at my tattoos. But you didn't see me cry as my children where born or have their name written over and in my heart.

I saw you change lanes while rushing off to go somewhere. But you didn't see me going home to be with my family.

I saw you, complain about how loud and noisy our bikes can be. But you didn't see me when you were changing the CD and drifted into my lane.

I saw you yel ling a t your kids in the car. But you didn't see me pat my child's hands knowing she was safe behind me.

I saw you reading the newspaper or map as you drove down the road. But you didn't see me squeeze my wife's leg when she told me to take the next turn.

I saw you race down the road in the rain. But you didn't see me get soaked to the skin so my son could have the car to go on his date.

I saw you run the yellow light just to save a few minutes of time. But you didn't see me trying to turn right.

I saw you cut me off because you needed to be in the lane I was in. But you didn't see me leave the road.

I saw you, waiting impatiently for my friends to pass. But you didn't see me. I wasn't there.

I saw you go home to your family. But you didn't see me. Because I died that day you cut me off.

I was just a biker. A person with friends and a family. But you didn't see me.

Repost this around in hopes that people will understand the biker community..

If you don't repost this, it sucks to be you. I hope you never lose someone that rides.

EVEN IF YOU DON'T LIKE US, RESPECT OUR RIGHTS TO RIDE WHAT WE CHOOSE AND TAKE A FEW EXTRA SECONDS TO BE SURE WE ARE NOT IN 'YOUR' WAY

[cobalt1999]

1. Nice post.

Even here people are quick to judge bikers (especially us Harley riders).

Here's a few biker sayings to add to your list...

Four wheels move the body. Two wheels move the soul.

Most motorcycle problems are caused by the nut that connects the handlebars to the saddle.

Life may begin at 30, but it doesn't get real interesting until about 60 mph!
You start the game of life with a full pot o'' luck and an empty pot o'' experience. The object is to fill the pot of experience before you empty the pot of luck.

If you wait, all that happens is that you get older.

Midnight bugs taste just as bad as noon time bugs.

Saddlebags can never hold everything you want, but they can hold everything you need.

It takes more love to share the saddle than it does to share the bed.

The only good view of a thunderstorm is in your rearview mirror.

Never be afraid to slow down.

Don't ride so late into the night that you sleep through the sunrise.

Sometimes it takes a whole tank full of fuel before you can think straight.

Riding faster than everyone else only guarantees you'll ride alone.

Never hesitate to ride past the last street light at the edge of town.

Never do less than forty miles before breakfast.

If you don't ride in the rain, you don't ride.

One bike on the road is worth two in the shed.

Respect the person who has seen the dark side of motorcycling and lived.

Young riders pick a destination and go. Old riders pick a direction and go.

A good mechanic will let you watch without charging you for it.

Sometimes the fastest way to get there is to stop for the night.

Always back your bike into the curb, and sit where you can see it.

Work to ride & ride to work.

Whatever it is, it's better in the wind.

Two-lane blacktop isn't a highway - it's an attitude.

When you look down the road, it seems to never end - but you better believe, It does!

Winter is Nature's way of telling you to polish.

Keep your bike in good repair.

Motorcycle boots are NOT comfortable for walking.

People are like Motorcycles: each is customized a bit differently.

Sometimes, the best communication happens when you're on separate bikes.

Good coffee should be indistinguishable from 50 weight motor oil.

The best alarm clock is sunshine on chrome.

The twisties - not the super slabs - separate the riders from the squids.

When you're riding lead, don't spit.

A friend is someone who'll get out of bed at 2 am to drive his pickup to the middle of nowhere to get you when you’re broken down.

Catching a yellow jacket in your shirt @ 70 mph can double your vocabulary.

If you want to get somewhere before sundown, you can't stop at every tavern.

There's something ugly about a NEW bike on a trailer.

Don't lead the pack if you don't know where you're going.

Practice wrenching on your own bike, first.

Everyone crashes. Some get back on. Some don't......Some can't.

Don't argue with an 18-wheeler.

Never be ashamed to unlearn a bad habit.

A good long ride can clear your mind, restore your faith, and use up a lot of fuel.

If you can't get it going with bungee cords and duct tape, it's serious.

If you ride like there's no tomorrow, there won't be.

Bikes parked out front mean good chicken-fried steak inside.

There are old riders. And there are bold riders. There are NO old, bold riders.

Thin leather looks good in the bar, but it won't save your butt from road rash if you go down.

The best modifications cannot be seen from the outside.

Always replace the cheapest parts first.

You can forget what you do for a living when your knees are in the breeze.

Patience is the ability to keep your motor idling.

Only a Biker knows why a dog sticks his head out of a car window.

There are two types of people in this world, people who ride motorcycles and people who wish they could ride motorcycles.

Never try to race an old geezer, he may have one more gear than you.

Gray-haired riders don't get that way from pure luck.

[Ghost in the Machine]

3. Great additions! Thanks for posting them...

:hi:

[Dr.Phool]

47. "Catching a yellow jacket in your shirt @ 70mph can double your vocabulary.

Brother, have you got that right.

[undergroundpanther]

56. Ohh fuck

I never had that happen to me Hope it never does.

But hail, that shit HURTS.And when there is no over pass to sit under, Damn We pull over ASAP and seek shelter as soon as we find some. One day it was a gas station. the hail made a helluva racket.
Luckily the bike was not damaged.I had a lot of bruises tho.It was summer I wasen't wearing sleeves.

[Blue_In_AK]

2. I'm glad bikers are a much nicer group of people

than some of them were back in the old days when my friends and I were assaulted by a biker gang during a home invasion in San Francisco. Times have changed, thankfully. :hug:

edit - "Sons of Hawaii," if you want to know.

[Ghost in the Machine]

4. There are bad apples in any group of people...

I've seen (and been in) both sides of the fence with motorcycle clubs. There *are* some clubs out there that exist solely for criminal enterprise, but in the last 15-20 years a lot of clubs have been forming to combat the stereotypical image of "bikers".

:hi:

[Blue_In_AK]

6. It's been a very positive change.

Here the various biker clubs do all kinds of charities and so on -- there's even a "blessing of the bikes" every spring at one of the community churches. It's just all so different from circa 1969. :)

[TahitiNut]

24. When I got back from Nam, and found a place to live after dealing with a marriage gone bad ...

... I bought my first motorcycle (a 350cc Honda) and THEN learned to ride it. It was a young gal and her brother who helped me most get my head straight. She was a survivor of horrible childhood abuse and he was a sometimes motocross and dirt track racer. Two of the straightest, kindest, truest people I've ever known in my life. He taught me how to survive on the back of a motorcycle - how to ride through sand, how to ride with another cyclist, how to ride with cars around, where to position my bike in the lane behind a car, and dozens of other tips that you can't find in books or pamphlets - including how to tell a decent biker from a thug on two wheels.

I was ENORMOUSLY pleased to discover that the vast majority of bikers were helpful, open, friendly, and generous people. When I took a solo bike trip in Summmer of 1970 north from Detroit, across the Big Mack, across the Soo, west across the top of Lake Superior, turning south at International Falls, following the Mississippi almost to St. Louis, then east through Illinois and Indiana and Ohio to Columbus, then back north to Detroit - camping in a pup tent and sleeping bag along the way - to get my head straight and stop PTSDing - I met dozens of bikers, both Canadian and American, on rice burners and Harleys and Beamer-guppies, and not a single one of them was hostile. I belonged again. These weren't the people dissing the troops. These people said "welcome back" when nobody else did.

Bikers? I was one and will always be grateful. I drive safe around them and always wave 'Hi!' I have since found out that a LOT of people who SCUBA dive also ride bikes - and do both safely. Good people.

[cobalt1999]

27. As a SCUBA diver and biker, I want to say "great post".

Glad you found a way back.

SCUBA divers and bikers have the comradeship of shared risks & experiences. It builds a bond that transcends the type of bike you ride or where you dive.

[undergroundpanther]

57. My roommate

Dives and bikes.He was an EMT and a firefighter too.
I know what you mean about that kind of comradeship bond .
Bikers I rode with as a kid they all come around once in awhile and I still have fond memories riding with them. My sister hangs with them still .Sometimes I ride but I hop on the back I have no license because my eyes are fucked up, but I love riding,Except for rideing in the hail, that shit was painful.We still joke about the hail.

[ForrestGump]

29. Learned to ride a motorcycle when I was 11; basically grew up in the water and

started SCUBA as early as I was allowed, at 15. Still two activities nearest and dearest to me...they really do go together quite well.

[hootinholler]

5. Never Forget Chickenman! n/t

[Ghost in the Machine]

12. Heh!

http://www.usssatyr.com/audio/chickenman.wav

On into the '60's, radio drifted in a hero-less limbo. And then . . . a daring new anti-hero hero rose like a phoenix over crime-infested Midland City (pop. 7,043). The new champion of justice was none other than "Chickenman - the most fantastic crime fighter the world has ever known - and he arrived on the scene resplendent in his rented, feathered, zippered suit to fight crime and/or evil."
http://www.usssatyr.com/chickenman.htm

[hootinholler]

31. OH! Um, I meant the other Chickenman.

This one.

Your link is more joyful.

-Hoot

[Oeditpus Rex]

7. Welcome back

[Ghost in the Machine]

14. I'll make it to that rally one of these years...

Thanks for posting a reminder!

:hi:

[Oeditpus Rex]

16. Look me up when you do

I know where the best breakfast places are. :9

[Ghost in the Machine]

23. You got it, my friend...

The invitation is there from me, also... if you ever make it to East Tennessee...

Peace,

Ghost

[OwnedByFerrets]

8. Its a good post, but wont ever happen....

we DON'T get respected and I ride like I am invisible.

Glad you posted this though, because it gives me a chance to vent. I am so sick and tired of the guys on crotch rockets ( I dont know what they are called now) weaving in and out of traffic....going 30-40 miles over the speed limit.....splitting cars.....doing wheelies on the interstate at 80 miles an hour. They give the rest of us a bad name. rant off.

[Ghost in the Machine]

15. No matter how hard you try, you just can't educate some people on some subjects..

... like 'sharing the road' or 'paying attention while driving'... I'd hate to even *think* about riding in Miami and/or Ft. Liquordale now, and I used to do it all the time... it was dangerous back then... 15-20 years ago...

I don't much care for the 'Ricky RoadRacers' on their little crotch rockets either. What about the ones who ride like that... wearing shorts, tank tops and sandals??? They're flat out crazy!

:hi:

[ForrestGump]

34. Hey...*I* ride a crotch rocket!

:grr:





Actually, though it's a Ninja I'm not sure it really qualifies as a crotch rocket (it's the ZX-11, more a sport tourer despite its long reign as speed king before the Suzuki EyeAbuser) and, besides, as with most things the problem is not the bike itself but how it's used. And I agree with both of you about these idiots on fast sport bikes who not only give the rest of us a bad name but who're a danger to themselves and everyone who's unfortunate enough to share the roads with them. Las Vegas seems to be Ground Zero for 'stunters' and I've seen some incredibly stupid things done by people on sport bikes here (as elsewhere, the Suzuki "Gixxers" in the 750-1000cc range seem to be the favored mounts of these 'squids'). The thing is that, though they're unquestionably possessed of a fine degree of control over their bikes when it comes to doing tricks with them, these morons often seem fairly incompetent when it comes to just riding a bike.

When I first came to the US I was taken aback by the widespread perception that motorcycles were basically toys. I'm still disturbed by that way of looking at them. In other countries, motorcycles are often not just a legitimate form of transport but the only personal transport a person has (I was like that where I came from and for years here in the US, including a recent three-year spell here in Vegas when the ZX was my sole form of transport), whereas here in the US the tendency is for people to own a car or two and use the motorcycle for 'fun.' Bikes sure can be fun, and the best way to travel in many cases, but seeing them as anything but a serious piece of machinery with serious capabilities and serious consequences if abused can be very, very dangerous. Unlike a car, it doesn't take much to take a bike down and you have to remain far, far more alert and recognize that riding a motorcycle is inherently more demanding, physically and mentally, than going the same distance in the average car.

One of the ways in which this cavalier attitude toward bikes manifests is in riders not being adequately protected -- leathers or similar and a helmet, with boots or similar and gloves a distinct necessity -- to the point where we see the half-naked riders you mention. Is it possible that any of these dweebs, or the Harley equivalents, have ever dropped a bike before? If so, I'd question the swiftness of their intellect. Look at Gary Busey, who I recall being an outspoken opponent of the helmet law (before they passed it in California) until he dropped his Harley, smacked his head, and began evangelizing for helmets (at least he learned, though he arguably got even more weird than he was before, as a result of his head injuries).

Of course, it's not just young (and usually they're young...older dudes either tend to already appreciate their own mortality before learning to ride or have been riding for years and had their quota of mishaps and near-mishaps) punks on Gixxers who're the problem. I've seen a great many posers who got the Harley as part of the midlife crisis deal and really have no riding skills whatsoever...they're just as much a danger. Not all are gentlemen of a certain age, either, and I've seen young women and a few younger men attempting to ride their new and highly-chromed Harleys and getting it absolutely wrong (I mean, other than the regulation brand new Harley Davidson-licensed clothing items, leather vest or fringed jacket, and fiberglass yarmulke that I guess is supposed to stand in for a helmet) and it truly sends chills down my spine to see such disasters just waiting to happen or to see them try to ride on streets they are not yet ready for, often seeming to beleive that their feet were meant to be outriggers.

For that matter, I know a few women and a lesser number of men who've stated that they will one day get a Harley even though (a) they know nothing about them or any other kind of bike and (b) they don't even have an interest in motorcycles but have bought into the image that the company's successfully marketed independent of the suitability of their bikes. Motorcycles should never be mere accessories. Then there're the many, MANY people of both cruiser and sport bike persuasion who have never ridden in their lives but will tell you that they're going to buy whatever the biggest and most prestigious model is at the time, the saddest fact being that unethical motorcycle salesmen will sometimes talk these rookies into learning to ride on something like a 1400cc sport bike that's capable of 200 mph (more, if the governor's deactivated). Very scary. Very dangerous.

Anyway, there sure are a lot of idiots out there on two wheels. More on four wheels, of course, and even in nations where bikes are seen more as legitimate transport 'cager' drivers tend to be possessed of this remarkable ability to see right through motorcycles, even when the rider's wearing dayglo pink duds and has a large neon sign towed behind.

Be careful out there, but not so extremely much that you don't have fun... :D

[Fumesucker]

48. "Fiberglass yarmulke"

:rofl:

Fantastic description..

[OwnedByFerrets]

64. Fantastic post.....

You said a lot of truths in that post. And being careful is the most important part.

www.wearableartnow.com

[Edweird]

35. South Florida checking in. Yes, it sucks ass.

South Florida is, without a doubt, the most pedestrian, bicyclist and motorcyclist hostile place I have ever witnessed. They WANT to hit you. I got hit from behind making a right hand turn about 8 months ago and ended up with a broken clavicle and road rash.
I commute from Miramar to Pompano daily (30 miles each way) as well do everything else on my bike....

I moved here about the time you were leaving apparently. I arrived around 18 years ago.

[undergroundpanther]

59. Yeah they're still called crotch rockets

And it angers me too because it is THOSE kind of fuck heads doing shit like you said make it harder on other bikers and scooter riders.
Crotch rockets are not bad things,they are whiny, but these fucked up people who disrespect the rules of the road and endanger people and themselves doing this stupid shit, THEY are the problem.And should be treated as such.

[az chela]

9. Well now I am sobbing like a baby!!!!

That was so beautiful and has a very special meaning to me as my son who was killed due to negligence at the VA was a biker for several years as were many of his friends.Two of his best friends are also dead.They all died way to young and would have given there last dollar to anyone who was hungry or their shirt to someone who was cold.I totally respect bikers,my husband and I used to ride all the time and my youngest son rides.He just built a tricked out Harley and he also has a crotch rocket.
In my sons memory and his 2 best friends thank you.
Bikers are damn good guys!!!!!And gals

[Ghost in the Machine]

18. I'm sorry for your loss...

:hug:

Many bikers die way too young, usually from the negligence of someone else. Your son's memory will always live on through the lives of those he helped, and through the actions of those he taught to follow his example....

Peace,

Ghost

[ProdigalJunkMail]

10. i respect everything but the loud pipes...

they serve no purpose...other than to make a racket...they don't save lives...cause you can't hear them until they are in front of you...

sP

[RC]

17. AMEN...!, I mean Amen.

there is no excuse for straight pipes. If they are illegal on cars, how do they get away with them on bikes?

[Owl]

21. Seconded AMEN.

[Ghost in the Machine]

19. I've heard plenty of loud pipes coming up behind me...

but I do know what you're saying.... I've also jumped a bit from having one I never heard, until it was right beside me while it was passing...

:hi:

[Fumesucker]

52. Just because someone is behind you

Doesn't mean they see you.

I don't particularly care for loud pipes myself, IMO they are a cop calling stereo system.

But I do think they are at least marginally effective in drawing attention to the fact a motorcycle is present.

Around here there are far more loud Harleys than other bikes. When I bought my current ride I got both quiet pipes and loud ones, I put the quiet ones on.

[DS1]

58. especially the shithammers who love to gun them through small towns

after midnight. those people make me dream of piano wire strung between trees

[Jeffersons Ghost]

11. K&R... I "see" you for who you are...

[Ghost in the Machine]

20. From one Ghost to another...

:thumbsup:


Peace,


Ghost

[cbayer]

13. What a beautiful post.

I know a lot of bikers and I am going to spread this around. Thanks so much!

[Ghost in the Machine]

22. Thank you.. I was glad to share it..

Pass it around, as it is the "Season of the Bikes" out on the roads now... summer is upon us

:hi:

[biermeister]

25. ghost- I've seen your postings in the dungen

where I spend a lot of time reading. Now I have another reason to like & respect you.

ride careful & have fun!

biermeister- '07 electraglide

[Ghost in the Machine]

39. Thank you, biermeister...

and welcome to DU...

:hi:

[gratuitous]

26. Why would anyone wear a leather jacket on a bike?

Just makes you sweat more.

Oh, waitasecond.

You didn't mean "biker"; you meant to say "motorcyclist." There's a difference.

[Ghost in the Machine]

40. No, I meant 'biker'...

.. not 'bicyclist'...

:hi:

[underseasurveyor]

28. To those that understand,

no explanation is necessary..
To those that don't understand,
no explanation is possible.

Cheers:toast:
Ride On

[Ghost in the Machine]

41. Well said!

:hi:

Peace!

Ghost

[undergroundpanther]

60. road rash

is why.

[Sequoia]

30. It wasn't me! I like bikers! Vr-r-r-r-ro-o-o-o-m !!

That's excellent. I'm going to send this to some biker friends who don't post on DU.

[Ghost in the Machine]

42. Thanks for passing it along

:hi:

Peace!

Ghost

[Sequoia]

32. Biker movies:

That one from the 1970s with Peter Fonda and Dennis ? where he got shot by those rednecks still bothers me to watch. Those were some fine bikes that's for sure.

[Ghost in the Machine]

43. That movie was 'Easy Rider' with Peter Fonda & Dennis Hopper

... I just saw some highlights of it on VH1 on "The Drug Years"...

Excellent movie..

Peace,

Ghost

[LWolf]

33. If it were safe to do so,

I'd ride my horse everywhere. I yearn for a world in which there is infrastructure for all kinds of alternate transportation, where all can be used safely.

[Ghost in the Machine]

45. That sounds like a plan, too..

I have friends who own & ride horses... I haven't been on one since I was 10 and got thrown...

Peace!

Ghost

[LWolf]

63. My ex was raised on a ranch.

As a matter of fact, we grew up together. He rode anything and everything as a kid. When he was 18, he built his bike; bought a frame and added parts to it, bit by bit. While he still rode with me, because I wanted him to, (and I rode with him, because he wanted me to,) he said he preferred his bike. It didn't require the same cost and level of maintenance that a horse does. ;)

[undergroundpanther]

36. Great POST!!

Alot of people in my family are bikers.
I know the bigotries bikers face.

I hate it,if you look different than a soccer mom or a button down khaki dad you are suspect.

I know punks, freaks, goths, just creative people with unique looks,and each of them face bigotry from the normals.


Long ago in school I saw a picture in my history book of an Indian wearing a roach. I had no clue what a roach was than, but I thought it was the most beautiful hairdo I had ever seen. I swore to myself someday I would have hair that beautiful..
Today ,I wear a mowhawk,I love it. I was the first person in my town to dye my hair unnaturally . It was bright ass fuchsia.

Bikers, punks,hippies, goths,cyber ,anyone else too creative to dress like everyone else does. Anyone too much of who they really are to be mainstream and live like a normal, faces the resentment,hostility, fear, projections and bigotry of normals and the 'mainstream'.

It is the culture bullies who cannot stand people being different.
And culture bullies are in every culture and against anyone they perceive as threatening.
Some culture bullies are such assholes and hypocrites they need a good 'ol curb stomping.

[Ghost in the Machine]

46. I couldn't imagine being short-haired and/or bald faced....

I haven't seen my chin or upper lip since 1984... it's just part of who I am...

Peace,

Ghost

[undergroundpanther]

55. Yeah I know how it is

I haven't grown hair on the sides of my head for years.It is uncomfortable to me to have hair on the sides of my head now.
And to have a tattoo free body, I wouldn't like being without them because they are part of me now, literally ,as are my pierces.
I wear certain things like leather, black clothes,colorful rainbowed things, feline themes and feline ears and tails because it is part of who I am.

I like a world to be diverse and full of varieties.I love seeing hair in wild colors and cuts,Love bikers with thier zztop beards and long locks. I love weird beards. I love people wearing clothes from other eras and places. Decked in spikes,guys wearing kilts or in flowing gossomer things.I love guys wearing eyeliner,I love all kinds of different looks,I love seeing all the distinctive creative things people do to express themselves with appearances.It makes life INTERESTING.

Monoculture & business wear is a tyranny.Mainstream is a tyranny too.I say this because in the "mainstream"people more or less all look the same way pretty much, and it is BORING AS FUCK.

The sameness of people's attire and limited style it bothers me.
It's like I live inside a zerox machine, making copies of certain"style" range and putting it on people everywhere. It is surreal to me.When I see a biker,a punk,a tattooed person,a freak I feel joy,and it makes my day.


I still wonder..
Why DO so many people dress so much alike each other so much of the time?
Do these people ever think they might want to step out of the norm and change. Dye a piece of their hair blue, or pink, or purple.. or get a bike and ride it, or maybe get a small tattoo?

Why so much of the same all the time?

Why are they so alike.Were they always like that?

[MikeH]

67. Good to have both "mainstream" people and people who are "different"

For myself I am and always have been for the most part "mainstream" in taste, clothing, lifestyle, and appearance.

I personally have no desire to get a tattoo, or dye my hair, or ride a motorcycle. And I personally have a very hard time identifying with the desire to pierce one's body.

It is important for each person to make their own choices about what they want to do, whether that is being "mainstream" or being "wild". In particular I will say that I do not appreciate somebody telling me that there is something wrong with my being mostly "mainstream", any more than you or somebody else appreciate being told that there is something wrong with you being "different".

Even though I am mostly "mainstream", I will say that it has been a process for me to become much less uptight, and much less judgmental about people who are "different", than I used to be when I was younger.

I had a very difficult dad, who was very very much "mainstream", very conforming, and very, very judgmental. I remember as a young man trying to be a "good boy" for my dad, and deviating hardly at all from certain conventions, even though many of my peers were doing so (this was in the late 60's and early 70's). And I tended to be very judgmental of those who were "different".

However I found that even though I was very much "mainstream", I was not going to escape the judgment of my dad. For instance I was not going to not ever make honest mistakes, and I was not going to never forget something. And being young I was not going to have my dad's knowledge of the world. And I was going to have problems, and things that bothered me and that I got upset about, and was not always going to be able to handle them in a fully "adult" way.

My dad often treated an honest mistake, an honest forgetting of something, or something that was not quite according to his standards as if it were a crime, or a heinous sin, or an affront to his pride. He always said he was doing this "http://www.nospank.net/fyog.htm">for my own good", which he in Godlike fashion decided I needed. And he was often very poor at understanding from my point of view some sensitive issue that was causing me to be upset. In short, my dad sometimes bordered on being abusive, especially emotionally and psychologically (though I did receive my share of spankings when I was a kid).

My dad died in 1985, shortly before my 35th birthday. I came to fully realize how angry I still was at my dad about a year after he died. I came to realize that much of his behavior was actually abusive; i.e. it was not just something wrong with me that I was often angry with him and resented him and things he said and did. Just coming to this realization was an extremely important step for me.

I have been in therapy over the years to deal with my issues, both relating to my dad and otherwise. One thing I learned was to distinguish between things that people did that really were not OK or not appropriate, and really did violate me in some way, and things that my getting upset with or offended by was my problem. And I also learned a sense of how much importance to attach to things that were not OK, and to better confront things that were actually not OK and important to confront, and let go the other things.

Just by having my own sense of things as described above, I became much better at not being upset by or judgmental of other people who are "different", or not like myself.

Incidentally the Swiss writer and psychotherapist http://www.naturalchild.com/alice_miller/">Alice http://www.alice-miller.com/">Miller in her books and writings documents how abuse suffered at the hands of one's parents, particularly when one was too small and too young to remember, and which is unconscious, manifests itself in hatred for surrogate targets, such as people who are "different".

In fact here is an interesting quote by Alice Miller in an article titled http://www.naturalchild.com/alice_miller/political.html">The Political Consequences of Child Abuse.

What is hatred? As I see it, it is a possible consequence of the rage and despair that cannot be consciously felt by a child who has been neglected and mistreated even before he or she has learned to speak. As long as the anger directed at a parent or other first caregiver remains unconscious or disavowed, it cannot be dissipated. It can only be taken out on oneself or stand-ins, on scapegoats such as one's own children or alleged enemies. Sympathetic observation of the cries of an infant brings home forcibly to the onlooker how intense the feelings involved must be. The hatred can finally work as a lifesaving defense against the life-threatening powerlessness.

Here is another very telling passage in the same article.

In the lives of all the tyrants I examined, I found without exception paranoid trains of thought bound up with their biographies in early childhood and the repression of the experiences they had been through. Mao had been regularly whipped by his father and later sent 30 million people to their deaths, but he hardly ever admitted the full extent of the rage he must have felt toward his own father, a very severe teacher who had tried through beatings to "make a man" out of his son. Stalin caused millions to suffer and die because even at the height of his power his actions were determined by unconscious infantile fear of powerlessness. Apparently his father, a poor cobbler from Georgia, attempted to drown his frustration with liquor and whipped his son almost every day. His mother displayed psychotic traits, was completely incapable of defending her son and was usually away from home either praying in church or running the priest's household. Stalin idealized his parents right up to the end of his life and was constantly haunted by the fear of dangers that had long since ceased to exist but were still present in his deranged mind. The same might be true of many other tyrants. The groups of people they singled out for persecution and the rationalization mechanisms they employed were different in each case, but the fundamental reason behind it was probably identical. They often drew on ideologies to disguise the truth and their own paranoia. And the masses chimed in enthusiastically because they were unaware of the real motives, including those operative in their own biographies. The infantile revenge fantasies of individuals would be of no account if society did not regularly show such naive alacrity in helping to make them come true.

Actually even though I am mostly conventional as far as tastes, appearance, lifestyle, and values are concerned, I actually do have one personal taste that has long been considered out of the mainstream. Since I was an adolescent I have always had a physical, sexual attraction to body hair on women. I particularly like hairy legs on women, but also like body hair elsewhere, such as legs, underarms, etc. That was one thing I didn't tell anybody when I was an adolescent, but since college I have come to tell a number of people.

It has always bothered me that just about anything else has been acceptable in our society at some time since the 1960's, except for natural body hair on women. I was bothered in the 1970's that hairy legs and hairy underarms on women did not become common and widespread like long (head) hair on men. And now it especially boggles my mind that body piercings are more acceptable than natural body hair on women. It really bothers me that women practically *have to* go through all kinds of pain and trouble to remove any and all body hair.

[OwnedByFerrets]

65. LOLOL

Funny that. I havent seen mine since 1976:rofl: :rofl: My wife would shoot me as an intruder if I came in the house with no beard LOL

www.wearableartnow.com

[lostnfound]

37. Recently I overheard an EXTENDED conversation between bikers: about the beauty of wildflowers

I ate at a diner with some friends and came out to the sight of two guys with beards and tattoos standing by their motorcycles admiring the extraordinary beauty of a nearby patch of wildflowers.

I laughed to myself as I got in the car, we exchanged smiles and they knew exactly why.

[Ghost in the Machine]

49. Real stereotypical, huh?

LOL! Great story, thanks for sharing...


Peace,

Ghost

[windoe]

38. With the price of gas there's going to be a lot more motorcycles.

Some people have not gotten rid of their wild spirit. This does not make them (us) dangerous.

[Ghost in the Machine]

50. Biker: It's not a label, it's a lifestyle!

:hi:

Peace,

Ghost

[Dr.Phool]

44. Kick and Rec!

[Ghost in the Machine]

51. Thank you!

:hi:


Peace,

Ghost

[Dr.Phool]

53. At my mothers funeral service back in December,

They had a photo montage that changed, showing pictures of her life. One of them was her with a 5 year old me, sitting on my dads new '57 Harley.

I've been on one ever since.

[Fumesucker]

54. We're up to four generations of bikers in my family now..

My parents were both bikers from all the way back before WWII, in fact my mother dumped her first husband off the back of her BSA 500 when she cracked the throttle a bit too hard once. :)

My daughter and son in law are bikers and my oldest granddaughter is already riding with her daddy on his Road King at eight years old.

Thanks for a cool post.

[Swamp Rat]

61. I saw you in the lane in front of me,

so I backed off a couple more car lengths to protect you in case I was rear-ended.

:)

[Catherine Vincent]

62. I don't mind bikers but there are two items that you mentioned that I can't stand.

All those ugly tattoos and those loud assed harleys. :)

[happyslug]

66. I understand your frustration, but it is one that also included bicyclist and pedestrians.

The problem with most drivers is that they are looking only for other cars or trucks, anything else they do not see. This is more a product of experience than anything else (i.e. they see cars and trucks all the time, but motorcyclist, Bicyclist and Pedestrians, especially in suburbia, are "Rare" and thus car drivers are NOT use to seeing them).

I was reading about a sociologist and he mentioned why people do NOT see certain things. He describe it like walking through a forest, your mind dismiss anything that is NOT what you are looking for, for example individual tress (unless a know landmark) are dismissed, as are most bushes and other fauna. Animals are noted, but unless harmful dismissed (unless looking for birds, most birds are dismissed). Things that may cause danger are marked and remembered. That is normal for people. When you drive a car you are like someone walking through a forest, you dismiss things that you are NOT interested in (i.e. side streets) and note landmarks (i.e. Red-lights) and other known dangers (other cars and trucks) but you dismiss things that are NOT a threat and are not landmarks (i.e. Motorcyclist, Bicyclists and Pedestrians). In a car none of them are a threat, and none of them are of any importance to the driver. This will change as more people end up going to smaller cars and smaller motorcyclist to get around (and as more people peddle bicycles and walk) but that will take some time (i.e. wait till the price of Gasoline equals the price of a Gallon of Gasoline).