Obama rescues 53 kids from fire, republicans demand an apology.

[Philosoraptor]

July 27, Chicago, Ill.

Presidential candidate Barack Obama saved 53 orphans from a fiery death just after dinner with his family. The Democratic candidate was just leaving a restaurant when he noticed smoke pouring from the upper floors of The Sisters of Mercy Orphanage and immediately plunged into action, risking his life to drag out all the children from the blazing structure, and all the staff as well.

After assuring that all the children were safe and sound, Obama left the scene where a large contingent of reporters clamoring to speak with the candidate had gathered. One reporter did manage to squeeze in a question as Obama got into his station wagon with his family. When asked if he considered himself a hero, Obama replied, "That word gets tossed around a lot, I'm just a man who did what needed to be done".

However, word of his heroic deed leaked out to the press, and several republicans have made public comments about how bad Obama has made America look by fabricating cheap publicity stunts, designed to enhance his stature as a candidate for president. Several important lobbyists connected with the mc cain campaign have complained bitterly and asked, "What's he going to do next, rescue the passengers of a sinking cruise ship from hundreds of starving great white sharks or something preposterous like that"?

The increasingly effeminate republican senator lindsay graham stated that, "Senator Osama, er, I mean Obama, should apologize to this nation immediately for his shameful and disgraceful showboating, step down, or even face impeachment".

Even the ghastly ghost of the late republican senator henry hyde rose from his grave and was seen floating around the Capital Building and wailing, "Catch the falling flag!", and waving around articles of impeachment.

A surrogate for the mc cain campaign said off record that the republican presidential candidate will offer an apology to the world for Obama's shameless act of conceit for having the audacity to run into a totally hopeless situation and actually doing something nice when he didn't absolutely need to.

mc cain is also expected to demand an apology from Senator Obama for his shameless and selfish act of heroism.

More as story develops.

[Bluzmann57]

1. You should write for "The Onion"

That is funny stuff. Lol.

[Philosoraptor]

4. More like "Cracked"

[proud2BlibKansan]

2. Meanwhile, back at McCan'tReadAMap's campaign headquarters:

[Philosoraptor]

3. That photo says it ALL.

[mikeargo]

5. Is it just the lighting...

Or does the guy in the front have a piss stain on his pants?

[Philosoraptor]

6. Both actually

[TheCowsCameHome]

7. The sense of excitement in the room was overwhelming.

Poor guy just couldn't contain himself.

[Cassandra]

8. They are praying...

for a better candidate, since the one they have is preying on them.

[classof56]

14. Hey, good one!

:toast:

[riverwalker]

12. did the guy in black shirt wet his pants? n/t

[Junkdrawer]

9. "Obama returns to face the music for failing to prevent fire." n/t

[mopinko]

10. no, no, henry hyde would be saying- "we must protect the rule of law"

THE RULE OF LAW, I TELL YOU.

[Philosoraptor]

18. & now I am doomed to lament the rule of law all throughout eternity Scrooge...

[mopinko]

20. it's really not complete without the intonations in his voice. coming from the

bottom of that flabby throat, sounding like he has a mouthful of something that he doesn't want to swallow, a voice like a very deep sewer.

[malaise]

11. This is very, very good

:rofl:

[treestar]

13. LOL! Perfect for the Onion.

:rofl: :rofl:


And like junkdrawer says, why didn't he do something to prevent the fire?

Yet if McSame had done it, he'd be a great hero and immediately start using it to assert why he needs more executive power!

[Jack Rabbit]

15. Excellent work

!!

[Philosoraptor]

16. I heard he only rescued the Muslim orphans!

[Flabbergasted]

17. Nice Spin Hitler. nt

[jmowreader]

29. Of course he did--Sisters of Mercy Orphanage is really a madrassa

[Philosoraptor]

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[Vinca]

21. That's about the size of it.

If Obama is ever caught in a burp it will be a major scandal involving abetting global warming and unauthorized emissions. (Yeah, yeah, I was going to say fart, but thought it was unbecoming to the office he's striving for . . . except, of course, as it relates to His Highness King George of Crawford.)

[Philosoraptor]

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[Philosoraptor]

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[Philosoraptor]

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[SteelPenguin]

25. Obama Shows Disdain for the Secret Service, Says McCain

"By running into that orphanage fire, my opponent recklessly endangered the Secret Servicemen and women who bravely have volunteered their lives to protect him, and me," said Republican nominee John McCain in response to yesterday's actions of Senator Obama. "Personally, I would never intentionally risk the lives of those brave American's who have sworn themselves to protect me. The Senator from Illinois should feel ashamed at his reckless behavior, and American's should ask themselves whether they want a president who would deliberately put American's lives in jeapordy in the name of politics."

[Gabi Hayes]

26. sounds vaguely familiar thematically:

http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=132x6545017

[Philosoraptor]

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[Philosoraptor]

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