mcCain has picked his cabinet (not sexist!)

[Bennyboy]

From the AP:(not really)

In another unprecedented move, Republican presidential nominee John McCain has announced two of his cabinet picks prior to the November election.

McCain tapped a local Wells Fargo bank teller for Secretary of the Treasury, and named his UPS delivery person as his pick for Secretary of Transportation.

Lance Goodling, 27, of Arlington Virginia and the drive thru window at the Jefferson Mall branch of Wells Fargo Bank, has been named McCain's pick for the nation's chief financial officer position. While his resume is slim (including an unsuccessful 4 month stint as assistant manager of a now closed Starbucks) "he is eminently qualified to replace current Secretary of the Treasury Hank Paulson", according to McCain, who gave a brief statement to reporters today. "The nation thanks Hank Paulson for his service" said McCain, "but you don't need to be a former CEO of Goldman Sachs to count money. I've driven up to Lance's window on three occasions, and all three times I was greeted with a hearty good morning. Twice I needed to change a hundred, and both times I was given five twenties. Lance will be a breath of fresh air in Washington and he has my full confidence".

Laqweeshiqua King, 34, of the District of Columbia, is McCain's pick for Secretary of Transportation. She first came to McCain's attention just one day before being named to the job, as she delivered a copy of "E-Mail for Dummies" to the McCain household. The book had been ordered for the senator by his wife as a present for his 94th birthday, which was last Friday. "I asked Lasee, Lanee, Labikwoo, er, uh, Miss King how she managed to deliver so many packages to so many people without getting lost", McCain
stated. "I was impressed when she showed me this little electric box with a map inside that she said she'd been using. She said she never had to make a left turn. I mean never. No left turns, ever! I knew right then, especially after seeing how young and vibrant she was, not to mention noticing those very strong, muscled legs, that I would name her as my Secretary of Transportation. She'll be able to tell everyone how to get around and her directions will contribute greatly to fuel conservation and the battle against global warming", the senator concluded.

McCain is also rumored to be looking at several ROTC kids from his
daughter's high school for Secretary of Defense, including JV track star Christian Booth, who last semester was named "Best White Rifle Twirler" at the DC area ROTC Weekend Rifle Twirlathon

http://groups.google.com/group/rec.music.gdead/browse_thread/thread/b7700e455dfa2fc4#

[ColbertWatcher]

1. "No left turns, ever!" LOL! I still liked the picture! n/t

[BrklynLiberal]

2. hahahahahaha

[pansypoo53219]

3. he's not gonna look in the nearest DC

hooters?