Man I've done some fun stuff in my life but

[MichaelHarris]

nothing as fun as reading the comments to Obama stories on the Fox News website. Heads are exploding, guns are loading, some are even gloating. Call me mean but I love reading their pain.

"
by chauncey Massachusetts
I can tell you right now. I am not sharing my money with anyone. It will go under my mattress earning zero interest for all I care. No lazy P.O.S. will get a dime from me. You can come and try to pry it from my dead lifeless fingers if you'd like but my other hand will be on my gun I cling to. Obama's socialst agenda will wreak havoc in this country. Everybody and anybody will be filing false tax returns including me. The IRS won't have a clue what to do. The people have the last voice. We can as a country NOT PAY TAXES, not conform to socialist policies and rebel against this agenda. We have the power and we may have to use it."

I haven't slept since the election, their pain tastes so sweet, mmmmmmmmmm

[Ken Burch]

1. "...the gun I cling to..." See...Obama was RIGHT about that!

Only in this guy's case, I don't think the gun is a firearm.

[MichaelHarris]

2. ya know

he said pry his money from his cold dead fingers. If he's dead I'll just take that along with the gun in his other hand. It'll be a two-fer!

[Clovis Sangrail]

3. ewww

but what... is only half of his body dead?

[Ken Burch]

6. OMG! The guy's a Republican ZOMBIE!

[MichaelHarris]

9. hahahahahaha

[liberalla]

15. Poor guy... sounds a little *bitter*...

... so he's got his gun, now where's that Bible at?

:sarcasm:

[NJCher]

4. well, I gave it an honest shot

But the site is designed so horribly and so many of the comments are just...banal.

Their election map is an assault to the eyes. Yeeks.

Can you recommend any other stories that have especially pained comments?



Cher

[MichaelHarris]

5. I'm digging some out now

they go from hunkering down and praying to hunkering down with guns. Conservatives sure like to hunker.

[Ken Burch]

21. And when things get REALLY bad, they start praying TO the guns.

n/t.

[MichaelHarris]

8. some are very racist

"There are early reports that Obama's first order of business will be to take down the Statue of Liberty in NY and replace it with yes you heard it here folks…… Mrs. Butterworth. !!!!! KFC will sponsor the demolition and new construction because the liberty torch will now be replaced with a chicken leg…. This should make the skyline more appealing according to the latest Cook County Illinois polls."

[Ken Burch]

20. There was somebody in the comments section of an Obama story on CNN

Who was claiming that Obama only won because the nation's pimps beat all their "girls" and made them vote for Obama.

Which is clearly unfair, if for no other reason than that the white pimps would've done that for McCain.

In any case, who knew the hooker vote could swing that many states?

:wtf:

[lapfog_1]

7. Just like a scene from Men in Black

Space alien: "Drop projectile weapon."

Hick: "You can have my gun when you pry it from my cold dead hands."

VISUAL: giant alien appendage comes out of the pit and strikes guy, killing him

Space alien: "Your offer is accepted."

[Jamastiene]

10. K&R

:spank: Me too though.

More more more. Their desperation feeds my soul. Muahahaahahaa :evilgrin:

[Edweird]

11. A guy I know has gone off the deep end.... Here's his responses to a MySpace poll....

(I only know him because I was hooking up with his sister and we had to pretend to be friends).

For the record, he's a former Canadian that moved to the US.


Name something you dislike about the day you're having?
~The Herd sold out to socialism. What that means… The lazy and poor will get cheques. My company will get taxed higher than the high taxes I currently pay. My clients are dropping projects as we speak, no new clients. Thanks to Socialism I will have to close my company, because I WONT hire Columbians to do my Drafting for me. SO! Your wonderful Socialist Government has doomed my company. This is the last year Ill be filling taxes as (his business name), I am forced to close my design firm, lay off two people after Christmas. The Pathetic Mouth Breathing Herd, gets their dream of “free money”, while I loose mine of having my own design firm.
But I guess that’s “Fair”

Last place you hugged someone?
~This morning, huggin on wifey.


Do you know anyone named Matt?
~I actually Know Matt Damon. Well not so well he comes over or anything, but say hi when we pass.


What color is your hair?
~Suicidal Blonde.


Last beverage you consumed?
~Red Bullies…

Who was the last person you talked to on the telephone?
~My Accountant, as soon as the “Mystery” Tax plan is released he will tell me how long I have before my Design Firm Crashes.


Is there anything stressing you out currently?
~Losing everything. To Be “Fair”. Paying $10,000.00 to get my citizenship escaping a doomed socialist country to find my self awoken in a fucking nightmare of hippy bullshit.


Do you text in class?
~I have no class *smile*

Do you remember what you were like a year ago?
~Yeah happy and successful republican.


Have you ever changed in a car?
~Changed into full Combat gear driving mach 10 to get back to base after a weekend pass.


Are you happy with your life right now?
~I have an Amazing Wife, Dog, New House, An Old House, Two Wicked shiny black cars, and my citizenship. Shame I am going to loose it all to socialists. I guess its not “fair” I earned all that, while someone sits on their parents sofa in the basement smoking a bong, skipping work gets pissed that they don’t have anything.


How many hours of sleep do you get every night?
~Not many lately.


Are you close with your mum?
~Until she starts talking about jebus, then I tell her I got a call on the other line.


What were you doing at 10pm Thursday night?
~Getting back from Boatshow schmoozing

What was the last reason you went to the doctor for?
~Tore my hip out of the socket.


Last person you got in a fight with?
~Its gonna be with the NEXT muther fucking Meatpuppet who throws Barrack Hussein Obama in my face again.


Have you ever in anyway, been betrayed by someone you trust?
~Anyone who voted in Socialism betrayed me and they betrayed America. Socialism is the precursor to Communism. The Last person to stand on a platform of “Change” was Fidel Castro.


Who will your next kiss be?
~My first and last kiss will always be (his wife)

Do you have trust issues?
~Now I do, had no idea so many people wanted my money. Well fuck off cocksuckers, I moved all savings out of the country, closing my company, and Ill go full time with someone else’s design firm, and my accountant will SCRUTINIZE the tax laws so I pay as little taxes as I am obligated to. You wont get a dime from me you lazy meatpuppets.

[silverojo]

13. I can't wait for the IRS to track this asshole down

He thinks it's bad now, wait till they haul his ass into court for "polishing up" the figures on his income tax return.

And BTW, buddy, you're in America now--learn to spell "check" the AMERICAN WAY! :rofl:

[Edweird]

18. The thing is, I'm sure he was paying as little as possible already.

That's what accountants are for.

Except for his politics, he's a cool guy. I had no idea he was so rabid until right before the election when he started sending out these freeperish bulletins.

[BR_Parkway]

14. His drafting firm is closing in midst of Real Estate meltdown - but it's

secretly cause we elected a Socialist? ROFL

[Edweird]

16. He designs yachts. The real estate meltdown didn't affect him in the least.

[Matariki]

19. Seriously doubt his business is closing because of Obama raising his taxes

I'd say he has a 'personal responsibility' problem :rofl:

[SheWhoMustBeObeyed]

12. Oh I think the IRS will have a clue

And when these J-the-P types who don't make shit do get their tax cuts, they will post lies about how much their taxes went up. Walking, talking pustules. I share your delight in their suffering.

[crispini]

17. Schadenfreude! It's what's for dinner!

Nomnomnom!