January 22nd 2009

[Aviation Pro]

(Dick Cheney lies in his bed. The pancreatic cancer that was diagnosed last year in September, and was hidden from the press until January 5th, has aggressively spread throughout his body. He has lost his ability to speak, but his mind is still surprisingly lucid. The last rites have been administered and now he is surrounded by his family as they stand vigil at his death bed).

CHENEY: Ha! I beat the bastards. Everything that I engineered will fucking die with me and there's nothing that n------'s administration can do about it. Directing Addington to destroy the man safe was the final stroke so there's nothing that will tie me to the interests I looked after for the past eight years. Operation Fear Monger is a rumour with no evidence to back up our involvement. As far as I'm concerned this cancer is a blessing and they can just try to depose my gravesite.

Look at Lynne, she's as hardbitten as ever, pursing those woodpecker lips of hers. Well at least she'll never know about my dalliances especially when I bonked that socialite before I shot old Harry in the face. Shit, she couldn't wait until I croaked since I'm worth close to a billion now. Too bad she won't see a fucking dime of it since I made sure it stays in escrow and then after the lawyers wrangle it out it'll go to funding the next neo-con think tank.

As far as that fucking, shitstain of a President, hoo boy, won't he be surprised when the Feds knock on his door in a couple of days. The little fucking fake cowboy should've known that I was going to sandbag his ass and pin 9/11, the illegal wiretapping and the torture on his moronic face. If he's lucky he'll end up in the Hague otherwise he'll swing like Saddam, which is quite the fucking irony. And if that little fuck tries to run to his redoubt in South America well there's a reason why we contracted with Blackwater for security services down there.

Damn, I'm getting sleepy, I guess it's time. Look at Lynne and the kids, boo-hooing like they mean it. That's it say goodbye to Dickie. Heh, I knew it, they're starting to crack smiles through their tears. Big toothy grins too, but why do their teeth look like daggers?......

(As the soul of Cheney screams, fade to black).