Report: Hitler had one ball

[mollymongold]

AN extraordinary account from a German army medic has finally confirmed what the world long suspected: Hitler only had one ball.

War veteran Johan Jambor made the revelation to a priest in the 1960s, who wrote it down.

The priest’s document has now come to light – 23 years after Johan’s death.

The war tyrant’s medical condition has been mocked for years in a British song.

The lyrics are: “Hitler has only got one ball, the other is in the Albert Hall. His mother, the dirty b****r, cut it off when he was small.’

Until now there has never been complete proof Hitler was monorchic – the medical term for having one testicle.

But the document tells how Johan saw the proof with his own eyes. In the account, he relives the horror of serving as an army medic in World War I.

He died aged 94 in 1985, but had told his secret to priest Franciszek Pawlar, who kept a note of their conversation.

Johan’s friend Blassius Hanczuch confirmed the priest’s account of how the medic saved Hitler’s life. He said: “In 1916 they had their hardest fight in the Battle of the Somme.

“For several hours, Johan and his friends picked up injured soldiers. He remembers Hitler.

“They called him the ‘Screamer’. He was very noisy. Hitler was screaming ‘help, help’.

“His abdomen and legs were all in blood. Hitler was injured in the abdomen and lost one testicle. His first question to the doctor was: ‘Will I be able to have children?’.”

Blassius said that when the Nazis swept to power Johan began to suffer nightmares and blame himself for saving Hitler.

Hitler’s genitals have long caused controversy. Some historians dismissed the “one ball” song as propaganda. But an alleged Soviet autopsy on Hitler backed it up.

Records show Hitler did suffer a groin injury in the Somme.

It is the first time an interview with anyone who treated Hitler during WWI has come to light.

Dr Martin Farr, senior lecturer at Newcastle University School of Historical Studies, said last night: “This genuinely new twist is fascinating.”

http://www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage/news/article1945960.ece

[Donnachaidh]

1. "had only got one ball"

:eyes:

[daggahead]

2. Didn't George Carlin say something about that in one of his acts? n/t

[musette_sf]

3. this is news?!?!?!

seriously, i thought everyone knew this.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hitler_Has_Only_Got_One_Ball

[Sebastian Doyle]

4. I'd never really given much thought to how many testicles Hitler had, actually.

But the thought of being the medic who saved his life in WWI... now there's a trip. Should have that let that one die in the mud, Johan.

[malaise]

24. Well that song was pretty much the standard in British

colonies especially at sports stadia. I grew up hearing that ad nausuem.

[lame54]

5. Yeah, but it was this big...

[renie408]

6. OH SHIT!! That was FUNNY!! n/t

[Drunken Irishman]

7. Even Godzilla likes to play soccer.

[mollymongold]

35. lol nt

[Beausoleil]

8. I heard it differently

Hitler has only got one ball,

Goering has two but very small,

Himmler has something simmler,

But poor old Goebbels

Has no balls

At all!

[trackfan]

12. That's the one I remember. n/t

[Sanity Claws]

9. Was it a soccer ball?

I don't think he was into golfing.

[JackRiddler]

10. The American version of the "one ball" song is better...

Hitler - has only got one ball
Goering - has two but very small
Himmler - has something sim'lar
And Dr. Go-balls has no balls at all!

Learned in my youth from the daughter of a vet. My first girlfriend, in fact!

What's the name of the tune? It's whistled. Very famous. You always hear it as an inspirational marching tune.

Anyway, all this fascination with Hitler the person is a form of religious relic-keeping beautifully mocked in the 1990s German film "Schtonk!" about the forgers of the bogus Hitler diaries.

Why do you think the article loads on all these golly-gee-whiz adjectives about how fascinating and amazing the "discovery" is? (Of something that's been known since Hitler's own lifetime?)

Because they have to assure you that this trivia is in anyway interesting.

WHO CARES?!

[Beausoleil]

11. Tune is "Colonel Bogey March" (Bridge on the River Kwai theme).

I heard this version from a Catholic priest who was raised in Britain during the war.

[beac]

18. Ha-- you beat me to it!

(this is why one should never answer the phone while replying...)

[JackRiddler]

36. Thanks subliminable...

for adding to my storehouse of trivia. Which with age depletes as fast as it fills!

[beac]

17. I believe the tune you are refering to is the

"Colonel Bogey March" written in the early 1900's and famous as the theme from 'The Bridge On The River Kwai':


http://home.comcast.net/~freewebman/war/ww2/bridge-river-kwai.mp3

[NoGOPZone]

13. That's still one more than most Republicans nt

[gratuitous]

14. Still one more than . . .

The aggregate total for the Democratic House and Senate leaders.

[Dr Fate]

15. This is old news- I read a similar theory in "Explaining Hitler" almost 10 years ago.

But I guess this serves to confirm that old story...

I highly recommend that book if you like to study the Nazis like I do, btw.

[Commie Pinko Dirtbag]

16. OMG LANCE ARMSTRONG IS A NAZI!!!1111!!!11!!!

[4lbs]

30. Also, it makes him extremely aerodynamic !!!111!!11!!

Less drag.

:rofl:

[Hippo_Tron]

37. That was my first thought too

[DS1]

19. Ein Ball, ein Reich, ein Führer!

[KatyMan]

38. One bourbon, one scotch and one ball...

sorry, George Thorogood reset

[DearAbby]

20. Soccer or Ping pong?.........n/t

[Uncle Joe]

21. It's too bad he wasn't lined up across from Alvin C.York,

having three balls wouldn't have helped him.

[old mark]

22. Hitler had one ball, Bush has no brain - Fitting, somehow....nt

[Mnemosyne]

23. Here comes Adolf with his pecker in his hand, he's a one-balled man and he's off...

to Rio de Janeiro... :)

[musette_sf]

25. allemande left, allemande right

...piss me off
fcvking jerk
get on my nerves!

[Mnemosyne]

29. LOL, couldn't remember the rest of the words, thanks musette!

I hope * ends up hunted the rest of his miserable life, as were the old Nazis.

:hi:

[LeftishBrit]

26. And is there also medical evidence that 'Dr. Goebbels had no balls at all"?

[rug]

27. Well, is it his right ball or his left ball?

[TexasObserver]

28. Why is "butcher" written "b*****r"?

[MellowDem]

31. It's "bugger"

Which I think translates to "fucker" in American English.

[TexasObserver]

32. ah HA

[santamargarita]

33. Someone - not me - should check Bush, they're related

[Ladyhawk]

34. Caution: Lowest form of poetry / humor below.

There once was a man from Devizes
Whose balls were of two different sizes
One was so small
It was no ball at all
While the other one won several prizes

[Generic Other]

39. So some Brit shot off Hitler's ball

Good job, old chap!