Free Republic Brings You the News (Barf Alert!)

[cali]

From HuffPo:

There's nothing worse than a long holiday weekend for falling behind on the news. What group of clumsy criminals are we bailing out now? And, gosh, will a zillion dollars be enough? You can lose track. Plus what's happening with Heidi and Spenser?

That's why a website like Free Republic is indispensable. I know most people write it off as the tragic mutterings of a bunch of dandruff-addled, pit-sniffing shut-ins without the social skills to form a lynch mob. But that's an oversimplification.

It's also a news aggregator. With one click not only do I get all the headlines I need, I also find out -- in parenthesis -- how they make me feel.

Right Tilt: Attacks Tilt India to the Right (Barf!)

One Dead Rabbi Not the Issue (Barf Alert)

A President Named Obama Changes the Name Game (BARF Alert)

Aligning Hillary Clinton & Sarah Palin is Insulting (Barf Alert)

It's a Madhouse Outside the Gun Shops, Too (Barf Alert)

Putting a Face on Big Auto (Semi Barf)

Morning In America - Could Barack Obama Become the Next Ronald Reagan? (Mega Barf)

Iowa Cafe Swamped with Orders for "Obama Cookie" (MEGA BARF ALERT!)

Second Stonewall: One Gay Man's Rant on the State of Queer Equality (Hurl-icious!)


Okay, so the part in brackets isn't actually a very useful feature. You can be pretty sure how you're supposed to feel is nauseous.

Almost everything makes Freepers throw up at least a little. If an army marches on its stomach, this one isn't going anywhere.

The trick, if you're not the typical Free Republic reader -- one hand on your gat, the other probing and stroking the crack between the couch cushions, dreamily, then frenziedly, then dreamily again -- is to figure out what it is about each story that makes you sick with rage.

<snip>

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/chris-kelly/free-republic-brings-you_b_147224.html

[Starry Messenger]

1. Have you been over to FR yet to see if they've linked to this story

with a (barf alert)? What a fun read! k&r

[cali]

4. I have. That's where I picked it up from. Posted by

an outraged Rimjob, no less.

[Starry Messenger]

7. I'm reading it there now.

The comments are unhinged (of course). Thank you for this comedy gift.

[davidinalameda]

2. there are some freepers I truly feel sorry for

and there are others I wouldn't mind burying in an anthill

[POAS]

3. I'm not crazy about ants either but geeez man I may barf..

[davidinalameda]

8. that would help the ants

[TahitiNut]

5. Well, it helps to take FRamamine.

:dunce:

[Cleita]

6. Why do that to your blood pressure?

We get enough Freeper news through the M$M.

[cali]

9. It makes me laugh.

[Ian David]

10. Freepers make me want to barf more than I can eat. n/t

[onehandle]

11. Why are they even addressing them at HuffPo?

That well known hate group is beyond marginal, judging by our recent success.

Ignore them.