About the two boys in the middle of Florida's gay adoption ban being overturned

[ck4829]

Miami-Dade Circuit Judge Cindy Lederman struck down a 1977 Florida law—the only one of its kind—that forbids gays from adopting. (Arkansas, Mississippi and Utah exclude unmarried couples, which has the completely intentional result of excluding gays.) In a case involving two young boys taken in by two gay men, she found the law was unconstitutional largely because it violated the rights of foster children to equal treatment under the law.

You could hardly find better proof than this that efforts to combat the "homosexual agenda" mainly serve to harm children in dire need of stable, loving families. Four years ago, Martin Gill and his longtime partner agreed to provide a foster home for two boys, one 4 years old and the other an infant, who showed the physical and emotional effects of neglect, including scalp ringworm.

Now a legal guardian who regularly observes the boys attests that they are, in the judge's words, "in excellent health, well-behaved, performing well in school and bonded to" their foster family. They have a dog, a cat and a rabbit. They attend a church.

But they have also spent four years in limbo. The adults whom they have come to regard as parents were only foster caregivers. Because of his sexual orientation, the state would not allow Gill to become their permanent, adoptive father.

No one else has asked to adopt the boys. Yet the Center for Family and Child Enrichment, which handles these matters, concluded that if the brothers could not be adopted by Gill, it would have to look for other adoptive parents.

http://www.chicagotribune.com/news/columnists/chi-oped1130chapmannov30,0,6061835.column

These boys have a wonderful and loving family, why would someone, anyone, want to take that away from them?

[msongs]

1. fundies think jesus doesnt like it nt

[WillParkinson]

2. Because they're....you know....gay.

And they recruit. Think of the children once in a while why don'tcha?

:sarcasm: x 10

[gollygee]

3. Kids get ringworm constantly

My daughter got it at school. It's not a big deal and certainly not a sign of neglect. I bet most kids get it at some point.

Those kids do NOT need to be taken from their parents. It is shameful that anyone would play politics with the lives of young children.

[jwirr]

4. One of the biggest things wrong with the foster care programs in

most states is that they are far too mobile. Children need a stable home that gives them a sense of security no matter the gender or marital situation of the parents. If they move those children now after all this time they are doing damage to them.

[murielm99]

6. That is true.

I know some foster parents in Illinois. I have been told that some foster children are moved every few months.

I have some friends here who raised a great daughter. She was their foster daughter for eleven years. At one point, a social worker tried to move her to another home. She was a normal teenager who got into some trouble over drinking. It was an isolated incident, and the foster parents handled it intelligently.

They went to court to keep their daughter. She stayed with them, finished high school and college. She is married and works in a bank. I think a move like the one attempted by social services would have devastated her, and might have ruined her life.

[Crunchy Frog]

9. Especially with what they know now about the process of early attachment

and the devastating effects when that process is interrupted. There's just no excuse for it anymore.

[davidinalameda]

5. they have a rabbit????

oh the humanity!

[Crunchy Frog]

10. Better watch out for a fundie Glenn Close character showing up.

[rvablue]

7. This could become a very good way of allowing these adoptions...

I had never thought of it in that context: equal protection under the law.

Thanks for posting.

[Crunchy Frog]

8. We need to expose the REAL anti-family agenda

of these fundamentalist hater assholes. :grr:

[wellstone dem]

11. The trauma of repeat moves is terrible for foster kids

I adopted a child from foster care and in the classes I took before my 9 year old daughter became my life, they told us about this.

The more moves, the more likely the child will exhibit depression, anxiety, etc. The child will never feel settled and safe. As it is, for a child moved from a foster home to an adoptive home, I was told that I could expect it to take the same number of years the child was in foster care, for the child to feel like s/he was fully part of the new family. Before we finalized the adoption, my daughter lived in fear that I would change my mind. After the adoption, she lived in fear that some behavior (and there was SOME behavior) would "break" our family. Any one putting the best interests of these two boys first, will support the adoption by their family--by their real father who has loved and cared for them while being called "foster father".

I stand up in opposition every time I see an attack on gay parent adoption, because I see an attack on my family.

We are not a two-parent family. There is not a male parent in my daughters life. An attack on gay parent adoption is an attack on my family as well as gay parent families. I will not stand by quietly.

My daughter spent more than 4 years on and off in foster care before I adopted her at age 9. Her birth family was a two-parent heterosexual family. But I am her mom. I have sat with her when she sobbed at night because she was afraid. I have taken her to her counseling appointments as she tries to deal with what happened to her before we were a family. I have cried with her. I have laughed with her. I have yelled at her. I have dropped her off for college. I talk to her at least 3 times a day, working to convince her that she can do this, that she is strong, that she is amazing--because she can and she is. I have loved her. I am her mom. Her life is better because we are a family. My life is better because we are a family.

I know I will never convince people who oppose adoption by anyone except heterosexual couples that our adoption was right. They will say it is wrong. But as my wise daughter once told me when someone said something bad about me, "Just because he says that, doesn't make it true."

[Luna Lovegood]

13. I'm so glad that Judge Lederman struck down this unjust law ...

So, according to this article, this was the last law of its kind? I hope so!

[jwirr]

12. There are so many children waiting for homes that this argument

is actually sinful - when someone wants to adopt these children the question should be "will you make a good parent" not what is you marital status or sexual preference.