Rapture Ready: "please!!!! Lord come in 2009 !!!!!"

[Bluebear]

Conclusion: These people 1) hate life and; 2) love exclamation points.

:crazy:

http://www.rr-bb.com/showthread.php?t=83507
http://www.rr-bb.com/showthread.php?t=82436

im so tired of this nasty world!! what else JESUS just RAPTURE US!!!!!

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Yes, God, please!!!!!!!!!!!

Amen.

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AMEN!!
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I have been lead to write this post by the Holy Spirit to tell you all that JESUS IS COMING!!!!

And our Lord God is coming very very soon!!!

Be ready!!!...I have never felt like this before in my life. I can't wait until my King tells me, "Come Up Here!!"

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is like the more we wait the the longer it gets..

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Me to me too>>. I want out of here!! Jesus come for us this year pleaseeee!!! I long to be with you so badlY!!!

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dont worry it wont be longer.. Scripture He who is coming will come and will not tarry. it wont be much longer... so hang in there its almost over

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YES PLEASE!!!

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Please LORD!!!! The spirit and the bride say come!!!!! Please return for your bride...we are so weary and tired.

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Dear Lord I am so sad and weary of this wicked world.

How I long to here you say, "Come Up Here".
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think about all the sick , hurting , tortured , kdnapped ,starving .. children under the age of determanation

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I second that! Let's get this show on the road!
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Marantha, COME LORD JESUS COME!!!!!!!

[SemiCharmedQuark]

1. I need to go check out the latest on Fundies Say the Darndest Things

It's a shite day...that site always makes me laugh

[stopbush]

2. The world would be such a better place if all these people were raptured.

Too bad it's a childish fairy tale that Ain't. Ever. Gonna. Happen.

[cynatnite]

5. I'd say amen if was a christian...

:evilgrin:

[damntexdem]

31. They have a lot of nerve to assume that they would be the ones to be raptured.

But if these nutcases start to disappear, I'd think it was more likely they were raptored than raptured. When will biological knowledge and technology advance to Jurassic Park level? ;-)

On the other hand, I am prepared for the Rapture -- I have a bumper sticker on my car asking "Come the Rapture, can I have your car?"

[ogneopasno]

3. So much with the awesome: "It is like the more we wait the the longer it gets.. "

Well, yes. That's true.

[hatrack]

22. That's the best unintentional comedy I've seen in YEARS!!

Yep, I'd say they hit the nail right on the proverbial head there - "The more we wait, the longer it gets."

:rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

[immoderate]

35. Maybe they're all a bunch of trolls....

...egging each other on. Oh yeah...!!!!!!

--imm

[ulysses]

4. I'm always reminded of Waiting for Godot when I read about these folks.

Sort of sad, really.

[sniffa]

6. Jesus, I long to be with you so bad

Are they expecting some great sex?

[ulysses]

7. not going there.

:scared:

[Bluebear]

8. There's an awful lot of references...

to being his bride and coming.

I kid, I kid!

[sniffa]

26. When they get to heaven, Jesus will fuck them 70 times

and tell them they were his first.

[dysfunctional press]

23. wait until some of those fundy chicks find out that he's WAY into anal...

praise jesus!

[gratuitous]

9. Apparently, they're not well, er, versed

But, since none of them are giving away all their possessions to the poor like Jesus ordered them to, it's pretty apparent they aren't very sincere in their desire. Nothing but seed that fell on the rocky ground that withers in the heat of the day.

[polichick]

10. How helpless they sound! Guess rapturing themselves is out of the question.

[stopbush]

15. A bunch of people living in a democracy longing to spend an eternity

in the dictatorship that is - by definition - a kingdom. Like King Jeebus is going to treat his heavenly serfs any better than would an earthly despot.

There are no votes in heaven. No opinions. No discussions.

Sounds pretty shitty to me.

[polichick]

29. Yep. It's no accident that those who look to a big man in the sky to save them...

...would also act as sheeple for the bullies the Republican party holds up as leaders.

Thankfully, people are waking up every day!

[RagAss]

11. Where have you gone Jim Jones?...Our nation turns it's lonely eyes to you !!!

[Ishoutandscream2]

14. Okay, this Boomer LOLed

Very nice!

[RagAss]

Hey Boomer...I so want that on a bumper sticker. !...LOL

[FudaFuda]

30. Jones was no fundie. He was an anti-racist, anti-capitalist, atheist advocate of socialism ...

and crazy as fuck.

[Stellabella]

12. Why don't they just do it themselves?

Sheesh.

[donco6]

13. There's nothing stopping them from meeting Jesus today.

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[stopbush]

18. Except that he doesn't exist.

I see Jesus a couple of times a week at Ralph's. He's a grocery bagger.

[billyoc]

16. Yes, please Lord, rid me of these freaks.

[Loge23]

17. "Get me out of here, I owe money!"

In business, a colleague of mine is fond of warning me to "watch out for the Christians, they'll get you everytime".
I'm not sure why this seems to happen so frequently, but many of the companies that stick us for money are run by people with a Bible on their desk. Less reading, more check writing, please!

[TK421]

19. "I second that! Let's get this show on the road!"

What do they think it will be like...a fucking carnival? Guess your weight or something?

Fucking loony bastards

[Sebastian Doyle]

20. It's really too bad that all the ultra rich bastards aren't really Christians

Jesus had that rule about camels passing through the eye of a needle before a rich man could enter Heaven and all that.

But if Jesus would do us a favor and rapture the top 1%, we could solve all the world's problems with the (mostly stolen) wealth they have.

[marmar]

21. "I can't wait until my King tells me, "Come Up Here!!"

How cheap this king is. He can't even spring for plane tickets? :P

[hatrack]

28. "Come up here . . and bring me a fried banana sandwich & some Percocet!"

[WolverineDG]

24. Hurry up already, Jesus! I need a new car! nt

[Kablooie]

25. Well, that's a pretty great recipe for disappointment. They just do it to themselves.

[cherish44]

27. These people have been yammering about the rapture coming "any day now" for years

Their god must be appalled at how they're wasting their lives and are bemoaning the world he created for them to enjoy.

[butterfly77]

32. What in the hell are they crying about...

We took all of their president's garbage and we are still here better than ever. They will feel better after they take Obama's medicine. The prescription is GET OUT OF THE WAY AND SHUT THE FUCK UP!
These people destroyed almost every thing good about this country, for many years and now they have the nerve to whine.

[Sheltiemama]

33. Somebody's being awfully presumptuous.

What would Jesus do? He would know the difference between "here" and "hear."

[ProgressiveFool]

34. "is like the more we wait the the longer it gets.. "

Dude, what? Wow that's profound. I actually had to read it twice before getting it.