Fuck You US Commerce Association!

[The Sushi Bandit]

http://www.sushibandit.com/2009/07/fuck-you-us-commerce-association.html



So I get this e-mail today. "You have been awarded the Best of Chicago 2009 Award in the Restaurants category by the US Commerce Association."

What the Fuck?? Chicago? Restaurant?? Who are these people??? Cucina Bella was a defunct Chicago Italian Eatery that closed it's doors over 4 years ago... 4 fucking years ago... Then I bought the rights to the name and opened a kitchenware store on MAUI with the same name... mind you the ONLY Cucina Bella in the whole fucking United States. It closed last year because of George Fucking Bush's Depression, LAST YEAR. So now I get an award for having a restaurant that is one of the best in Chicago! Who fucking voted for this? Dead People??

So they put this press release on their website:

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE

Cucina Bella Receives 2009 Best of Chicago Award

U.S. Commerce Association’s Award Plaque Honors the Achievement

WASHINGTON D.C., June 8, 2009 -- Cucina Bella has been selected for the 2009 Best of Chicago Award in the Restaurants category by the U.S. Commerce Association (USCA).

The USCA "Best of Local Business" Award Program recognizes outstanding local businesses throughout the country. Each year, the USCA identifies companies that they believe have achieved exceptional marketing success in their local community and business category. These are local companies that enhance the positive image of small business through service to their customers and community. Various sources of information were gathered and analyzed to choose the winners in each category. The 2009 USCA Award Program focused on quality, not quantity. Winners are determined based on the information gathered both internally by the USCA and data provided by third parties.

.... OK I get it... They want me to buy their $189.00 fucking plak to hang on my wall cause all their data and interviews said that I must own a restaurant in Chicago!

These people at the US Commerce Association need to be castrated with a rusty knife from my defunct kitchenware store.

[Hello_Kitty]

1. That sounds like a 'Who's Who' scam I got sent to me recently

I got an email from an outfit claiming they were a registry of "important people". They had a fancy-schmancy patrician kind of name (which I can't remember right now) and said I just needed to pay a small fee to acknowledge my "honor". I googled it immediately and saw several negative comments and appearances on scam watchdog sites.

[realisticphish]

2. yup

"who's who among american high school or college students who paid 50 bucks to get their name listed in a crappy book"

[The Sushi Bandit]

6. It looks like they just open up any old phone book

or old links in google

[imdjh]

3. There is an entire industry built on this.

Consider any award to be suspect.

As you drive into some small town and see a sign that says, "Tree City USA National Arbor Day Foundation" or some such bullshit..... the city council wasted something like $20,000 for that designation. They come up with these awards, but it costs money to get them. Theoretically, they decide first who the winners are, and then the winners can elect to "donate" the required funds to keep it going.

Another little scam out there are these "certification" programs for all manner of things from outdoor education (Outward Bound kind of stuff) to municipal police departments. Being an accredited police department costs something like $100,000 every five years or so, and it's completely worthless. You don't get a break on your insurance, you don't get squat except the right to claim to be accredited. A local municipality bought into this years ago when the town was still being constantly reminded of it's rather blatantly racist past, some of which was real, some of which was folklore, some of which was indeed official, and much of which the city had no control of whatsoever. So they paid the fee a few times, and now the budget watchers are saying "No more."

I always get a laugh out of the restaurants that have "Voted Best In Tampa Bay" on their signs. Some of these places are awful. They were voted best, because no one gave a shit when only ten people voted for these minute categories like, "Best combination crab house and fondue restaurant." or "Best family owned sub shop." It reminds me of the restaurants in Provincetown, all of whom seemed to be "four star" or "five star" despite none of them having been rated by a respected guide.

[SoCalDem]

4. Indeed, ALL of these "organizations" exist for ONE purpose

To raise money for THEMSELVES..

The sad thing is that some have morphed FROM entities that USED to actually serve the public.. The BBB in my hometown, actually did "investigate" businesses that treated customers poorly, but it's now just a front organization that collects "dues" from businesses, and they have their monthly breakfasts where they all just sit around schmoozing with each other..

and the ones like the one who "awarded" you, are just solicitors of money..

here's what you should do..

Go to the newspaper, or write to the AP, and lay it all out.. This is the kind of story they might be interested in:)

[The Sushi Bandit]

5. I think your right

great advice!